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Monday The date was September 28, 1998. We had all just returned from an uneventful weekend to another Monday morning. When I arrived, classmates were talking about a rumor. The first version was that some skater kid had committed suicide in a park near the school. I remember thinking "that's too bad" and then going on about my business. It came time to do the usual televised morning announcements. I was in the video production class that put the show together so I took my place at the audio board. Announcements were normal as usual, but as we were finishing, Vice principal Markham-Cousins came in. We signed off and the secretary came over the PA to ask teachers to turn on their TVs again for one more announcement. "Special Report" was the graphic that was on the screen as we turned to Mrs. Markham. She began to speak. "I regret to inform you that Senior BRIAN GACEK passed away last night." I don't remember anything else that she said because I just went numb. I remember thinking that it couldn't have been Brian, it was supposed to be a skater. There had to be some mistake. Not Brian, not the same Brian that I saw in the hall just 3 days ago. Once the channel was clear, she quickly took off her mic and slipped out of the room. After sitting there for a second, I got up.....I muttered-I knew him. I went to my chair in the classroom and just sat there looking off into space. I don't doubt that my fellow classmates were at a loss for words. Everyone came over and in their own way, tried to offer their condolances. It was obvious that they didn't have a clue what to say. To their carbon copy questions "are you OK?" i responded that i would be fine. After the period was over, I got up, and went to the art window to see how my friends were dealing with the news. I encountered Lacey in the hall. She was disturbed and we began to talk about it. Further down the hall by the home economics room, I saw Amber. She was in tears. We went to her and knew instantly what was wrong. After a few minutes, we decided with a few others that we would leave the school and go to Perkins restaurant and talk. We went to the main office and looked for our school psychologist Mr. Paisley. He served the entire district so he was not in his office. I knew Mrs. Markham fairly well-I thought that she would give us permission to leave. In Mrs. Markham's office, we found out that the counselors' had setup a crisis room in an unused classroom in the 300 wing for us to go to. She walked us over there. When we arrived, all my friends were there. Many were crying and the counselors were wandering among the clumps of people sitting on the floor trying to help. Sarah, my friend, walked across the room and gave me a hug. Sarah said that we could all go over to her house. The counselors were very hesitant to let us go until we had parental approval. So everyone began to call their parents. There was only one phone in the room, so I decided to go with Jenny D to the library to call home. She made her call, then it was my turn. I took the phone off the desk and sat on the floor as I dialed my mothers work number. She answered, I paused, then said "mom, one of my friends killed himself last night......would it be alright if I left school and went to Sarah's house?" When I uttered friend killed himself, I began to weep. Up until then, I hadn't cried at all.....but something about saying that Brian killed himself ended my denial. My awesome mom said that she would grant me permission to leave the school grounds. Sarah's mom ordered $50 in pizza for us to eat, though not many of had appetites. She spoke of her own loss to suicide and how it effected her life. Throughout the afternoon, people came and went. Amber, Arianna, and Lacey went to the store because several people came up with the idea that it would be positive to wear ribbons to show our support. When they came back from the store, they stopped at the tree where Brian ended his life and decorated it with the ribbons as a sort of memorial.
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