Humour

What Would [insert your Deity here] Do?
(For those of us with myth-terious backgrounds...)

Many folks, when faced with a difficult choice, say that they always ask themselves, "WWJD?"  As we all know, WWJD? is "What Would Jesus Do?"

Now, for those of non-Christian religious persuasions, we have...

WWAD?

• (A= Artemis) Turn him into a stag to be torn apart by his barking hounds.
• (A= Athena) Stare him down (then beat the crap out of them...in a logical manner.)
• (A= Apollo) Test their musical skills... in a fair contest.
• (A= Aphrodite) Don't you mean "Who" would Aphrodite do?
• (A= Astarte) Make love AND war.
• (A=Aonghais) Paint his face blue bare his arse , break a bottle and utter the challange "cum intae ma brew, ya tea bag" (translated to head butt me if you are brave enough or Glasgow Kiss)

• (B= Bacchus) Get them drunk and turn them into dolphins.
• (B= Britannia) Rule!
• (B= Buddha) Does it matter?  If you are enlightened it doesn't.  If you are  not enlightened it still doesn't.

• (C= Ceres) Discuss it calmly while holding a scythe.
• (C= Ceridwen) Stir it up one more time.
• (C= Chaos)  No one is quite sure... but it will be messy and...  interesting.
• (C= Cthulu) Does it matter?  No one will survive anyway.

• (D= Demeter) Lay waste to your lands if you don't have her daughter back by10 p.m.! (And don't even THINK of laying a hand on her!)
• (D= Discordia) Here... have an apple... IF you are the fairest!

• (E= Ereshkigal) Strip them and hang them on a hook to rot.
• (E = Elueusinians) It's a mystery!

• (F= Flora) Say it with flowers.
• (F= Fortuna) Play the lottery.

• (G= Gaia) Remind them to worship the ground they stand on.
• (G=Ganesha) Saddle up his rat.

• (H= Hades) Tell them to go to Hell.
• (H= Hecate) Show them the right path... or is it the left?
• (H= Hera) She'd get jealous.
• (H= Hercules) He'd labor to come up with an answer.
• (H= Herne) Lead them on a Wild Hunt!

• (J= Janus) Look the other way.
• (J= Jupiter) Strike them down with a bolt from the blue.

• (K= Kali) Tear out their beating heart, drink their blood and dance on their trembling corpse.  Then wear parts as jewelry.
• (K= Kwan Yin) Show them some mercy.

• (L= Loki) Turn left at the next street, buy five chickens, "borrow" some jewelry, change into a seal and steal some apples. For starters.
• (L= Luna) Moon them!

• (M= Mithras) Cut the bull!
• (M= Mars) Suit up for battle.
• (M= Mercury) Change his mind... again.

• (N= Narcissus) Huh? Is there someone else here?

• (P= Pan)  Tell them to pipe down or fuck off.
• (P= Pluto) Hump Minnie's leg.
• (P=Priapus) Rise to the occasion.

• (S=Sekhmet) Drown her sorrows in blood.
• (S= Set) You don't want to know but it won't be nice.
• (S=Shiva) Smoke some weed and dance the night away.

• (T= Thor) Hammer it out.

• (V= Vesta) Keep the home fires burning.
• (V= Vulcan) Live long and prosper. (Hey, this took a while! I was just checking to see if you got this far.  After all, I suffered for this;  now  it's your turn!)

• (Y= Yahweh)  "I hear you, I hear you.  Stop with the burning bush already! OY!

• (Z= Zeus) By Jove, he'd flirt with the girls!