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CAT Tracks for October 16, 2002
JUST FOR FUN... |
Hey...nothing concerning paychecks. I did NOT say that no mistakes were made...it's just that this edition has nothing to do with them. Such frequent occurrences are not really newsworthy...
I received the following e-mail at 11:30 p.m. Maybe the hour made me giddy...I thought it was funny. So...I decided to share...
This was an actual letter sent to a man
named Ryan DeVries by the Michigan Department of Environmental Quality,
State of Michigan.
***************************
Mr. Ryan DeVries
SUBJECT: DEQ File No. 97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec. 20;
Dear Mr. DeVries:
It has come to the attention of the Department of Environmental Quality
that there has been recent unauthorized activity on the above referenced
parcel of property. You have been certified as the legal landowner
and/or contractor who did the following unauthorized activity:
Construction and maintenance of two wood debris dams across the outlet
stream of Spring Pond. A permit must be issued prior to the start of
this type of activity. A review of the Department's files shows that
no permits have been issued. Therefore, the Department has determined
that this activity is in violation of Part 301, Inland Lakes and
Streams, of the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act, Act
451 of the Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of
the Michigan Compiled Laws, annotated.
The Department has been informed that one or both of the dams partially
failed during a recent rain event, causing debris and flooding at
downstream locations. We find that dams of this nature are inherently
hazardous and cannot be permitted. The Department therefore orders
you to cease and desist all activities at this location, and to restore
the stream to a free-flow condition by removing all wood and brush
forming the dams from the stream channel. All restoration work shall
be completed no later than January 31, 2002.
Please notify this office when the restoration has been completed so
that a follow-up site inspection may be scheduled by our staff.
Failure to comply with this request or any further unauthorized activity
on the site may result in this case being referred for elevated
enforcement action. We anticipate and would appreciate your full
cooperation in this matter. Please feel free to contact me at this
office if you have any questions.
Sincerely, David L. Price
*******************
This is the actual response sent back........
Dear Mr. Price,
Your certified letter dated 12/17/01 has been handed to me to respond
to.
First of all, Mr. Ryan DeVries is not the legal Landowner and/or
Contractor at 2088 Dagget, Pierson, Michigan. I am the legal owner
and a couple of beavers are in the (State unauthorized) process of
constructing and maintaining two wood "debris" dams across the outlet
stream of my Spring Pond. While I did not pay for, authorize, nor
supervise their dam project, I think they would be highly offended that
you call their skillful use of natures building materials "debris." I
would like to challenge your department to attempt to emulate their dam
project any time and/or any place you choose. I believe I can safely
state there is no way you could ever match their dam skills, their dam
resourcefulness, their dam ingenuity, their dam persistence, their dam
determination and/or their dam work ethic. As to your request, I do not
think the beavers are aware that they must first fill out a dam permit
prior to the start of this type of dam activity.
My first dam question to you is: (1) Are you trying to discriminate
against my Spring Pond Beavers or (2) do you require all beavers
throughout this State to conform to said dam request? If you are not
discriminating against these particular beavers, through the Freedom of
Information Act, I request completed copies of all those other
applicable beaver dam permits that have been issued. Perhaps we will
see if there really is a dam violation of Part 301, Inland Lakes and
Streams, of the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act, Act
451 of the Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of
the Michigan Compiled Laws, annotated.
I have several concerns. My first concern is - aren't the beavers
entitled to legal representation? The Spring Pond Beavers are
financially destitute and are unable to pay for said representation - so
the State will have to provide them with a dam lawyer. The
Department's dam concern that either one or both of the dams failed
during a recent rain event causing flooding is proof that this is a
natural occurrence, which the Department is required to protect.
In other words, we should leave the Spring Pond Beavers alone rather
than harassing them and calling their dam names. If you want the stream
"restored" to a dam free-flow condition please contact the beavers - but
if you are going to arrest them, they obviously did not pay any
attention to your dam letter, they being unable to read English.
In my humble opinion, the Spring Pond Beavers have a right to build
their unauthorized dams as long as the sky is blue, the grass is green
and water flows downstream. They have more dam rights than I do to
live and enjoy Spring Pond. If the Department of Natural Resources
and Environmental Protection lives up to its name, it should protect the
natural resources (Beavers) and the environment (Beavers' Dams.).
So, as far as the beavers and I are concerned, this dam case can be
referred for more elevated enforcement action right now. Why wait
until 1/31/2002? The Spring Pond Beavers may be under the dam ice
then and there will be no way for you or your dam staff to
contact/harass them then.
In conclusion, I would like to bring to your attention to a real
environmental quality (health) problem in the area. It is the
bears! Bears are actually defecating in our woods. I definitely
believe you should be persecuting the defecating bears and leave the
beavers alone. If you are going to investigate the beaver dam, watch
your step! (The bears are not careful where they dump!)
Being unable to comply with your dam request, and being unable to
contact you on your dam answering machine, I am sending this response to
your dam office.
Sincerely,
Stephen L.Tvedten
2088 Dagget Pierson, MI 49339
Montcalm County
District Representative Land and Water Management Division
Re: DEQ File No. 97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec. 20; Montcalm County.