Wrapped in daddy's arms
and then to me they came
never quiet the same...
but always telling of death. And so I did start from sleep to run
wishing for neverending sun
so I won't sleep
and the face of death can't seep...
showing me what's to come. And as a child I learned early
how to turn off all feelings growing surly
altering by any means the waves of my mind
so the death visions can only lag behind...
lost in the fog of denial. Why can I see
this I never asked to be
and I don't want to know
how the ones I love will go...
And feel their death each clear night. See the pain in daddy's face
as over him the car did race
shattering the only feeling I had left
leaving an already broken child bereft...
Thinking if I knew why couldn't I stop it. In eternal hell fire guilt rains
on one whose soul fate condemed life long pain
and I always and still wonder
do my dreams cause them to go assunder...
and my heart breaks chanting:it's all my fault. If I could shut off the dreams I sigh
maybe by chance they would not die
but I know down deep they have no power
other than to torment, my soul do they devour...
and I writhe in what i cannot escape. I'm older now, but still afraid
for out of my sleep they still are made
so I run, fight, and hide
to true sleep I can never subside...
So talk to me late at night stay with me
deep me in your sight
softly I plea
help me to flee
what lurks inside of me. Rhonda Enrayne - vixenskis@aol.com
