April 13, 2001
"Blessed is the man whom God corrects;
so do not despise the discipline of the Almighty.
For he wounds, but he also binds up;
he injures, but his hands also heal.
Job 5:17-18
Yesterday I experienced what can only be described as a crushing disappointment that was obviously the hand of God at work. I struggled all day to understand God, what he was doing, how he could be working for the good when I seemed to hurt so badly. What I realize is that in his great love for me God will orchestrate or allow circumstances that will cause pain (not evil) so that he can heal me. He'll allow the perfect painful circumstances to happen so that something in me that needs to be healed will come to the surface so I can see it and grapple with it... then God can heal it. It's like going to a doctor when a bone has been set and healed incorrectly... they need to break it again, inflicting much pain in the process, in order to set it correctly so that it will heal properly and function the way it was originally intended. God is the heart doctor.. he knows the things inside me that have been set incorrectly because of past experiences and hurts and he will allow me to go through additional pain... he'll allow my heart to be broken so that he can heal it; so that it he can set it correctly and I will be healthy, able to move forward in my life living the way God always intended.