Well, as promised, my response to Jan's article. I checked out most of the sites that Jan mentioned in her article. The Dear Birthmother letters were indeed kind of.....strange. You have to check it out yourself. But in general, Jan I think, was exaggerating. In all fairness, she was writing an article, and you do have to stretch the truth sometimes perhaps. But I mean, I went to google, and i typed in the search keywords that she suggested. The first twenty something sites that came up were legitimate sites to facilitate matching birth parents with their children. I didn't go beyond that.

But basically, the things she said were not incorrect, merely exaggerated. So should couples be allowed to "buy" babies? Not really "buy". Should couples be allowed to adopt babies over the internet if they have to pay a fee. Well, let's take a closer look at the fee. Raising a kid is an expensive business. Looking at the fees that they charged Kazakhstan baby that Jan called about. It worked out to be $22000 I believe? Well, who wants to bet that raising the baby until the point of transfer to the new parents has cost more than $22000? Like I said, caring for babies is not cheap, especially in the first year or two when they require constant attention. I don't think that it is unreasonable for the people who raised the child to recoup some of the money that they spent, especially since the adoptive couple will be escaping the cost of early infancy.

So, money aside, what is the issue? Adopting via the internet. Quite frankly, I don't seem to have much a problem with it. I'm a fan of adoption in its original sense. I've always thought that every kid deserves a chance to be brought up in a stable and loving family. I've always thought also that every couple who wants to care for a kid should have one. Some couples are unable or unwilling to have children. Adoption should be in place as an alternative. And women who have children who don't want them should have adoption as an option.

So adoption is good. So the only thing now is adoption over the internet. It seems a strange thing to do over the internet. Earth shattering to both the kid and the family, just with the click of a mouse. But if the internet helps with the adoptive process, then isn't that a good thing? Because we think adoption is good right? If we don't, of course, the point is moot anyways. But assuming adoption is good, then isn't anything that helps the process also good? I think the key lies in how you look at the internet. Because, how is this different from the traditional adoption process? Traditionally, I guess you register with the hospital, or some kind of organization, and then when a baby appears, they give you a call and you go down to the hospital. Well, how is this different from the internet? For one thing, on the internet, you're not really there in person to meet the kid and the mom. But what if you're out of town that weekend, and you have to send a relative to get the baby from the hospital. But you are able to talk to the doctors, the birth mom and the baby through videoconferencing. Well, the internet is basically the same thing. What other problems. Um....hospitals are reputable and accountable for their actions, whereas net companies are not. A fair argument, and a valid concern. But there is always that element of risk whenever you deal with the internet. You live by it, or you don't do business on the net, simple as that. As for Jan, who is concerned that the adoption ads are aimed at net-savvy young women who got pregnant when they didn't want to be....well, if they don't want their kid, then maybe adoption is the best thing after all, wouldn't you say? There is a danger again, that they'll be desparate for money, and so turn to the net rather than the hospital, and in doing so, run the risk of turning their kids over to bad people. Which, I realize is a bad thing. But the way to stop it is not to ban all internet adoption agencies. It is to educate young women on the dangers that they may be exposing their children to. In a semi-free market economy there will always be people out to make a quick buck. There's no helping it. The best thing to do is to encourage "buyer beware". But in the end, you simply cannot control every aspect of people's lives. Unless you decide to institute a totalitarian government. Which is a topic for another day.

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