Bible Thoughts

March 14, 1999

The words of the apostle Paul, preserved through thecenturies that have followed the writing of this epistle, are as true today as the day in which they were written. They establish a principle that is true for all ages. Children are to obey their parents, for it has been right to do so from the beginning. Even Jesus Christ was obedient to his earthly parents(Luke 2:51).

Children who respect the Lord at present will have the same attitudes toward their own parents. If Christ could obey his, surely any child can also do the same whatever the generation or the age. Such obedience and respect brings a calmness to a home and great benefits to the age in which one lives. Proper behavior begins in the home and with the family. Disrespect for parents will lead to disrespect for any authority.

Obedience to parents grows out of a proper respect for parents. In verse two of Ephesians 6, Paul stated, "Honor thy father and mother." So living to bring about that honor is up to the parent. If one shows little or no respect for a child, there will be little(if any) respect shown to the parent. The father/mother, by attitude, behavior, and speech must treat children in a way that will lead them toward the paths of righteousness. Mistreated and ignored children seldom grow up to have the respect they should for parents. Proper respect begins early in life and will continue until the parents no longer live upon the earth.

Righteous parents are interested in their children and in seeing their children have those things that are needed to live a productive life. Obeying and following parents who are following the Lord will contribute to a child being "well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth"(v. 3). People who belong to the Lord have a lifestyle that avoids many of the harmful practices found in society. By setting an example to one's children early in life, habits can be formed that will last a lifetime. And--even when they may stray, more often than not, they will remember what a parent taught them, by word and example, early in life.

Paul also encourages that "fathers" are not to "provoke...your children to wrath"(v. 4). Children are to be treated as children. They are not adults; they lack the maturity to be able to control themselves in situations. It is up to the parent to guide a child in such a manner that he/she learns to control wrath rather than wrath controlling the child. The strongest influence in regard to controlling/not controlling anger is the parent. When one begins early to try to deal with children in a proper and helpful manner, anger can be pacified.

All children do have a temper(mild or otherwise). It is the duty of parents to so treat children that they not be provoked to wrath. How can a parent provoke a child? One way is by demanding the unreasonable of a child. A parent must remember that a child is not an adult. Children will think and act like children. Expecting the impossible can lead to frustration in the heart of any youngster.(this is not excusing misconduct) Punishment that is too severe for the infraction can also provoke wrath within the child. And, punishing the child for something the child did not do can incite the same kind of feelings. When a parent disciplines a child, it is wise to make sure of the guilt. There have been instances where children were punished for something they did not do or were overpunished because of the anger of the parent. Never demand of a child more than the child is capable of doing. Cheerful obedience to a parent will be decided by the degree of respect for the fairness of the parent.

The apostle encourages parents to "nurture them(children) in the chastening and admonition of the Lord"(v. 4). Inherent within the word "nurture" is the idea of education(Vine). In fact, it is proper to explain that in the framework of this word it is the duty of parents to educate children in mind and morals. Obedient and respectful children come from the right kind of teaching, both by example and by words. A child increases his/her respect and honor toward a parent when the parent is concerned with the child walking in the paths of righteousness. More often than not, the child will remember the lessons taught in them more than any type of instruction. Learning from the cradle to be dependent upon the parent, a child will be more like the parent(s) than any other person. Such a strong influence will follow through life. The child who knows about the "chastening and admonition of the Lord" will have a solid foundation upon which to build a future that will be satisfying to God, to mankind, and to oneself.

Parents can rear obedient children only when the proper example is set before the children, when a spirit of love and care exists within the home, and appropriate discipline is administered in a fair and effective manner. The parent who applies the principles of Christ in rearing children will never regret such attitude and behavior. The child who is reared under such conditions may not always walk in the paths taught by the parent, but they will never forget what they were taught. It is the parent's duty to teach; it is the child's duty to listen, learn and apply--throughout life.

"Lo, children are an heritage of Jehovah; And the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows in the hand of a mighty man, So are the children of youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them; They shall not be put to shame, When they speak with their enemies in the gate"(Psalm 127:3-5).