YBible Thoughts Y

August 16, 1998

Parents often find themselves in a state of confusion in regard to administering proper discipline to children. They seek to find methods that will direct their offspring in the ways that are right. Often, they read books by men and attend seminars where "authorities" explain that if they will only follow their methods, they will not have many problems. It is not long, however, until they realize that the ways of those men are not satisfactory. They turn to other "authorities," in the hope they will learn more appropriate methods for the guidance of their youngsters.

For Christians, they will seek the answer in the word of God. Understand, however, that the Bible gives answers to spiritual needs and does not deal with all of the problems faced by all parents. But the word of God does give instruction as to the proper moral and religious principles to be taught and applied to children. Providing the needed guidance to lead one's family in the paths of righteousness is available from the instructions found in the scriptures. This prepares a child to deal with the other problems of life as he matures.

Paul is giving instruction to those who compose a home in Ephesians 5 & 6. Having spoken in regard to wives and husbands, he tells children to "obey their parents; for this is right"(6:1). They are further encouraged to "honor thy father and thy mother"(6:2). Following the teachings of the inspired apostle will contribute to one being "well" and to "live long on the earth"(6:3). A home with loving parents and obedient children creates an atmosphere that will make the home an enjoyable and profitable place.

There are problems, however, that arise in the best of homes. Children may not always obey the parents, or they may engage in activities that are not appropriate. When this happens, what is a Christian to do? Paul(6:4) teaches parents to "bring them up"(nurture) with "chastening and admonition of the Lord."

A wise parent instructs in righteous principles, as those principles are applied to one's own life. An example of doing right by the parent will have a positive affect on offspring. A parent that ignores the law of God, neglects the service of God, and lets all other activities come before God, while living a life that, to say the least, is on the edge(questionable living and practices), will effectively tell a child that little thought is given to living faithful to the Lord. It is extremely difficult to teach a child to live right if the parent does not live right! The "nurture" of which Paul speaks takes time and effort--and--a great deal of sacrifice.

When a child is provided the proper instruction and given the right example, the child will not be perfect. Like adults, there are times when mistakes are made and correction must be administered.

There are many different methods that one may use toward helping a child to realize that a wrong has been committed and a penalty must be paid. It is wise to learn early in life, "Whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap"(Galatians 6:7). A child needs to understand through verbal explanation, the difference in right and wrong. Always be willing, as well, to listen to the explanation of the child as to his/her behavior. From admonishing to isolation to denial to many other approaches, parents must use their knowledge and maturity to "bring up" their children.

One effective method for dealing with a child's behavior is to spank the child. This method should not be the only method utilized, but can be effective when properly applied. It is not right to abuse the child, and a proper paddling is not "child abuse" regardless of what some "authorities" may say. The Lord provided a proper place to administer that punishment and, when properly done, will cause no lasting damage to a child(Proverb 23:13).

Most of us have been in a store where an unruly child(weighing less than 50 pounds) has been able to manipulate and lead a grown person into frustration. Some even ignore such misbehavior and let the child have his/her way, continuing to annoy and aggravate those nearby. A proper administration of a few swats in a private location would help to solve that problem.

There are many areas in which human authorities contribute much to our society. There are other areas where they offer little help, and, in fact, contribute to the negative conduct of our society. Please note the following:

"New York(Reuters) -- Compared with children who are not spanked, those who are have(sic) lower scores on tests of cognitive ability -- a catchall term including intelligence, memory, learning and language skills, according to University of New Hampshire(UNH) researchers." (Reuters)

All human research has some flaws, since it is done by fallible humans. Research does not establish truth, it only reaches conclusion through evidence the researcher(s) observe. That evidence can be slanted to favor the position the researcher is trying to establish. The preceding is an example of flawed research. The bias of the investigators led them to a conclusion that contradicts the teaching of the Word of God. When one researches the Bible teaching on corporal punishment, it is evident that several thousand years of human history contradict the research conducted at the University of New Hampshire.