Noraa2005: hola Hnsn1440: lol Hnsn1440: howdy Noraa2005: my dad was on so i decided to not change sn Hnsn1440: oh, okay Noraa2005: whatcha doin? Hnsn1440: trying to talk to Kyle Hnsn1440: and do homework Noraa2005: your kyle? Hnsn1440: how bout you? Hnsn1440: yeah Noraa2005: kyle w. Hnsn1440: yup Noraa2005: nothing Hnsn1440: huh? Noraa2005: i'm doing nothing Hnsn1440: oh, okay Hnsn1440: feel any better? Noraa2005: yeah i took some codeine Noraa2005: it still there though Hnsn1440: oh Noraa2005: hey i thought about it when you left i was a little flirty on the way home sorry Hnsn1440: it's alright Hnsn1440: i didn't help any Noraa2005: well if we're in agreement is it ok? Hnsn1440: what do you mean? Noraa2005: i mean i know that for me i'm just like "over the commitment" so my mind tells me its ok to flirt now Hnsn1440: oh Noraa2005: but i don't want to put my self in a bad position Hnsn1440: i forget i'm off of it Hnsn1440: yeah Noraa2005: what? Hnsn1440: it doesn't ever cross my mind that the commitment's over Noraa2005: yeah well it hasn't mine either until you left and i thought that i might have flirted too much Noraa2005: and then i didn't want you to think i was like............ nevermind Hnsn1440: :o) Noraa2005: well what do you think Hnsn1440: about? Noraa2005: what we just talked bout smarty Hnsn1440: what about it though? Noraa2005: that was for you to decide i'm still kind of out of it Noraa2005: :) Hnsn1440: nah, you know what you're talkin about Noraa2005: thanx Hnsn1440: what? Noraa2005: nothing Noraa2005: so you never said what you thought Noraa2005: about the hunger problems in zimbabwee Hnsn1440: didn't know there were any Noraa2005: well what were your thoughts on the other subject we were convoing about Noraa2005: i need some chap stick Hnsn1440: got a pot sitting right here of it Hnsn1440: about flirting? Noraa2005: yeah Hnsn1440: i don't know Noraa2005: i mean for me most of what i do can be called flirting but i don't think of it that way most of the time Hnsn1440: yeah, it's just you Noraa2005: but well you remember how we talked after the flood Hnsn1440: yeah Noraa2005: well has anything changed since then Noraa2005: i mean i was trying to ask my self the same thing Noraa2005: and i haven't got a answer Hnsn1440: i've been asking myself that too Noraa2005: well what has yourself told ya Hnsn1440: i've been confusing myself Noraa2005: like what Noraa2005: (see thats the coolest thing about our friendship that i hope never changes we're honest with each other) Noraa2005: i mean totally honest Noraa2005: but anyway whats been confusing ya Hnsn1440: like one day i'll just want to be friends cause i see how close our relationship is but i don't want to mess it up...and then the next day my thoughts will be completely different Hnsn1440: yeah, i've never been able to be totally honest with anyone Noraa2005: completely different? Noraa2005: and i hope ya feel you can be honest with me Hnsn1440: i don't know, wish there was more Noraa2005: i know what ya mean cause i feel the exact same Hnsn1440: i do, i don't share much with other people Hnsn1440: weird huh? Noraa2005: i mean i know its "natural" to want to have a close relationship with a girl but is it right between us at this point in time Hnsn1440: define right? Noraa2005: if i could the answer might be easier Hnsn1440: uh huh Noraa2005: i mean its not a sin and i don't care what other people think Hnsn1440: yeah Noraa2005: but well like you said i don't want anything to come between our friendship Hnsn1440: yeah Noraa2005: and most importantly i want it to be of God Hnsn1440: me too Noraa2005: yeah i know and thats a good thing Noraa2005: as long as we're both seeking God's will its a little easier Hnsn1440: true Hnsn1440: if not it wouldn't work Noraa2005: yeah i know then thered be no question Noraa2005: but as it is well i don't know Noraa2005: any thoughts? Hnsn1440: in the same boat as you, i don't know Noraa2005: so what do we do? Noraa2005: smart girl Hnsn1440: pray... Hnsn1440: that's the only sure thing i know of Noraa2005: i know that much Hnsn1440: :o) Noraa2005: but in a subject as this i want to make sure its God's answer and not one that i conjure up Hnsn1440: yep Noraa2005: cause it would be so easy to convince myself of an answer Hnsn1440: yeah Hnsn1440: that's what i've been wondering if i'm doing Hnsn1440: but i've prayed about it so much Noraa2005: why? Hnsn1440: i don't know Hnsn1440: it's just been on my mind Noraa2005: i mean what answers have you come too that would make ya think that you thought them up Noraa2005: its not really been on my mind till tonight Noraa2005: i mean off and on but i really felt weird after you got out Hnsn1440: i'm sorry Noraa2005: cause thats the most serious i've flirted in over a year Noraa2005: not your fault it works both ways Hnsn1440: i understand Noraa2005: but anyway what have you come to Hnsn1440: nothing Hnsn1440: i just don't want to jump into something that's what I want and not what God wants...and also there's two sides to a relationship and i don't know exactly what you're thinking or feeling Noraa2005: well join the group Noraa2005: you wanna know what i'm feeling well i can tell ya that Hnsn1440: okay Noraa2005: but i know that God doesn't work through feelings Noraa2005: its gotta be deeper than that Hnsn1440: yeah, i agree Noraa2005: i mean my feelings tell me that your the first girl i've been this close to and still be just friends so what would it hurt to slowly become more but............. Hnsn1440: but? Noraa2005: the buts what i don't know cause thats what God has to fill in in whatever way he answers Hnsn1440: ahh... Noraa2005: sorry i think i'm doing most the talking and i'm sure you wouldn't mind venting Hnsn1440: no, it's fine Noraa2005: no really go ahead "EXPRESS yourself" (: Hnsn1440: :o) Hnsn1440: i have Hnsn1440: some of it's been through you cause it sounds like you're thinking the same thing as me Noraa2005: yeah i know Noraa2005: so now that we've talked whats your thoughts Hnsn1440: still don't know Noraa2005: ok well i'm stuck so you'll have to pick up from here Hnsn1440: but another thing i was thinkin about was now that this commitment's over it seems like people are gonna make you feel guilty if you start dating...i don't know if you know what i mean Noraa2005: i know exactly Hnsn1440: okay, good Noraa2005: but i mean i know its harder saidn than done but if its of God then i'd hope i wouldn't care what others think even if the others are "good" peoplw or even our friends Hnsn1440: i mean, i don't know if i've told you but back in Feb. when i first started coming i liked James and i found out he was on the commitment and i prayed about it and i got over him really quick but this is different...like God keeps bringing it to my attention Hnsn1440: yeah Noraa2005: yeah well its like after the flood i had a crush on you but i was able to listen to God and together we made a great friendship but i wander if theres suposed to be more Hnsn1440: yeah Noraa2005: or if there can be more Noraa2005: or if there will be more Noraa2005: :) Hnsn1440: lots of questions Noraa2005: and no answers by the way remind me to pick up an application from circuit city morrow Noraa2005: thanx Hnsn1440: but then i think what if something went wrong and our friendship got messed up...but then i think a little more and can't imagine ever getting mad at you...i don't know that i could Hnsn1440: alright Noraa2005: yeah i've thought about that more than anything Hnsn1440: i just don't want to lose my best friend Hnsn1440: cause i really don't know where i'd be without you Noraa2005: cause i mean i know that if we had more then we would have arguments but i hope that by then our friendship is tight enought to talk and get on and over Noraa2005: yeah i mean your like the best friend i've ever had Hnsn1440: exactly Hnsn1440: what would we argue about? Hnsn1440: i know something would come up more than likely i'm just trying to imagine what Noraa2005: thats why i do know that if there ever was more then it would go slow and on our on time Noraa2005: i don't know but it'd probally be misscommunication or something stupid Noraa2005: i mean even married couples argue sometimes Hnsn1440: yeah, that's all arguments are anyway...over something stupid Hnsn1440: i know, my parents argue all the time...if i was my dad i couldn't have married my mom Hnsn1440: but i'm glad he did Noraa2005: yeah i am too :) Hnsn1440: :o) Noraa2005: i mean its really cool that we can talk about this Hnsn1440: yeah, i never imagined i would be talking to a guy about how i felt about him Noraa2005: yeah the same Noraa2005: well except about a girl Hnsn1440: yeah Noraa2005: so what now? Hnsn1440: i don't know, what do you think? Noraa2005: i asked you first (: Hnsn1440: not fair Noraa2005: c'est la vie Hnsn1440: right Noraa2005: hey i started the whole convo so you can go first Noraa2005: i mean until we answer this question then we're absolutely no where Hnsn1440: i know Noraa2005: well nowhere different Hnsn1440: just a state of confusion Noraa2005: yeah so what now? Hnsn1440: hmm Noraa2005: i don't know that language Hnsn1440: i don't either Noraa2005: well i still asked you first? Hnsn1440: i know, i know Noraa2005: (: Hnsn1440: i'm glad we talked about this Hnsn1440: i just wish there was a clear-cut answer Noraa2005: good i hope if you ever want to talk about anything even if it about me then you want be afraid to just talk Hnsn1440: thanks Noraa2005: i mean i'd rather be confronted then talked about Hnsn1440: yep Hnsn1440: same to you, if you ever need anything Noraa2005: yeah well you still never answered the question (i: Hnsn1440: i don't have an answer Hnsn1440: do you? Noraa2005: no i was hoping you did thats why i kept asking Hnsn1440: lol Hnsn1440: and that's why i keep turning it back to you Noraa2005: i mean like we said i have an answer i just don't konw if its right Hnsn1440: yeah Hnsn1440: how will we know if it's right? Noraa2005: i know all the scenarios i've played them through in my mind but i want to choose the right one Hnsn1440: yeah Hnsn1440: i don't want to lose our friendship and i don't want to hurt you Noraa2005: i don't know i mean God doesn't work through trial and error i don't think Noraa2005: hurt me? Hnsn1440: yeah Noraa2005: how would you do that? Hnsn1440: i don't know Noraa2005: well whyd you say it Hnsn1440: who knows Noraa2005: come on you had to have a reason think about it Hnsn1440: i guess emotionally Hnsn1440: i knew you'd say that Hnsn1440: do you know what i mean? Noraa2005: well did you mean hurt me in a deeper relationship or without Hnsn1440: both Noraa2005: how would you hurt me without Hnsn1440: maybe something i said, i'm not sure Noraa2005: i don't know i'm pretty sure that we should be able to keep our friendship Hnsn1440: me too Noraa2005: but if both of us feel this strongly about it then how will we react if anything ever happened Noraa2005: is everyone still online Hnsn1440: no, just Kyle Noraa2005: ok just a minute Hnsn1440: okay Noraa2005: i think i'll stay here Noraa2005: i got kicked off Hnsn1440: okay Hnsn1440: i was wondering what happened Noraa2005: well where were we? Noraa2005: all four words began with a w Hnsn1440: yup Hnsn1440: you asked if i'd had any new revelations Noraa2005: ok i'm not going to try checking a profile anymore Hnsn1440: :o) Noraa2005: well where were we? Noraa2005: again Hnsn1440: i think we were both trying to find an answer Noraa2005: well whats your thoughts now that we've talked about it Hnsn1440: lol Noraa2005: i mean seriously now that we've talked how do you feel Hnsn1440: better Hnsn1440: i'm not confused anymore Hnsn1440: i just wanna know what God wants Hnsn1440: cause we pretty much want the same thing right? Noraa2005: yeah Noraa2005: well what do we do now Hnsn1440: not sure, do you know? Noraa2005: thats why i asked you Noraa2005: :) Hnsn1440: am i supposed to make a decision? Noraa2005: yep Hnsn1440: why me? Noraa2005: cause your so smart Hnsn1440: whatever, you know how i am with decisions Hnsn1440: :o) Noraa2005: yeah but this is something that has to be decided mutally betweem us and God Hnsn1440: yep Noraa2005: but hurry cause i think my dad woke up because of stephen and dusty so he wants me to get off Hnsn1440: oh no Noraa2005: yeah but we both need sleep Hnsn1440: yup Noraa2005: i would just like to feel like this convo helped some Hnsn1440: yeah Hnsn1440: i think it did i just don't wanna leave it unsettled Hnsn1440: but yet it's hard to make a decision Noraa2005: yeah if it did help then i don't feel it Hnsn1440: well what would help? Noraa2005: an answer Hnsn1440: okay Noraa2005: so? Noraa2005: whats the answer for now at least? Hnsn1440: so how do we go about stating an answer? Noraa2005: i know how to state it i just don't know what it is Hnsn1440: then how can we answer? Noraa2005: tell me Hnsn1440: tell you what? Noraa2005: an answer Noraa2005: well now i'm just asking for an answer for now Hnsn1440: for now? Noraa2005: well unless you know a answer Hnsn1440: i know my answer, but I want to make sure it's God's too Noraa2005: well i've told you my answer (but i agree i want to know if its Gods) but whats yours Hnsn1440: what's your answer? Noraa2005: i've already told you Hnsn1440: tell me again Noraa2005: you first :) Hnsn1440: no Hnsn1440: why can't we say it? Noraa2005: you mean say that we both like each other and that its going to be near impossible to keep anything from happeniing in two years Noraa2005: or that we're both scared and don't know what to do Hnsn1440: all of the above? Noraa2005: well thats how "I" feel what bout you Noraa2005: don't say you agree i want to hear your view Noraa2005: but quickly :o) Hnsn1440: why deny what we're both feeling? Noraa2005: deny? as in how? Hnsn1440: um... Noraa2005: speak :) Hnsn1440: i'm not sure how to explain Noraa2005: well try Noraa2005: please Noraa2005: i'm confused and thats a new feeling for me when its about relationships Hnsn1440: i guess, if we both like each other and want more why act like there's nothing there? Noraa2005: true Hnsn1440: well, we both know about my experience with relationships so... Hnsn1440: and i know God's put us here for a reason Hnsn1440: maybe the commitment was so that we wouldn't be involved so that we could become friends and maybe more Noraa2005: yeah thats another thing i feel like sometimes i'm taking advantage of you because you don't know what i do Hnsn1440: you can't help that Hnsn1440: taking advantage of me how? Noraa2005: i don't know i haven't felt like it yet i just feel like it might happen Noraa2005: its just another scenario Hnsn1440: can you explain it though? Noraa2005: i don't know how Hnsn1440: try? :o) Noraa2005: i mean i've had many different experiences and (nothing personal) but you've never even kissed anyone Hnsn1440: alright Hnsn1440: i think i got ya Noraa2005: so if we ever kissed i might feel like i was coming on too strong and that maybe you didn't want it yet didn't know how to say no Noraa2005: see i've played out these weird scenarios :o) Hnsn1440: lol Hnsn1440: but those situations will come up if something happens Noraa2005: so we finally got out what we've been beating around but what do we do now Hnsn1440: what are our choices? Noraa2005: yeah but they'll all be fine as long as we're always brutally honest and trusting Noraa2005: i think you pretty much know Hnsn1440: well? Noraa2005: so what ya think Hnsn1440: you tell me Hnsn1440: and don't say you asked first Noraa2005: i asked first Noraa2005: :o) Noraa2005: but a little faster Hnsn1440: you decide :o) Noraa2005: this isn't a decision to be made online Hnsn1440: i know Noraa2005: how bout we go at morrow and talk if it comes up Hnsn1440: so what do we do? Hnsn1440: okay Noraa2005: i mean if anything happens then i guess we'll decide what to do then right? Hnsn1440: yeah Noraa2005: so lets just keep on doing what we've been doing and if something happens then well go from there Hnsn1440: okay Noraa2005: whats your thoughts Noraa2005: don't say the same thing :) Hnsn1440: we won't get back in the same rut will we? Noraa2005: rut? Hnsn1440: like, where we were before tonight Noraa2005: well we're not out of it yet Noraa2005: :) Hnsn1440: true Noraa2005: but well no we won't as long as theres always communication Noraa2005: well i guess we should both go to bed Hnsn1440: yeah, once that's gone there's not much we can do Hnsn1440: probably Hnsn1440: i'm going to finish this paper though Noraa2005: so sweet dreams Hnsn1440: you too Noraa2005: aight and if you think of anything then write it down and tell me later Noraa2005: later alligator Hnsn1440: alrighty, same to you Hnsn1440: call if you decide to do something tomorrow 1