By Fred P. Stone, Ph.D., 9^th Gup Yellow Belt

Which is better for your mental health—Tae Kwon Do or psychotherapy?  It is a question that I have been asking myself a lot since I started Tae Kwon Do (TKD) last November.  As an Air Force social worker, I spend most my time counseling people about their problems—most often trying to help them feel just a little bit better about themselves.  We therapists do this by empathizing with our clients and helping them to have insight into their problems.  Tae Kwon Do isn’t a whole lot different—it helps us feel better about ourselves.  The TKD instructor (who would never be mistaken for a psychotherapist), however, uses the marital arts to help students gain confidence, discipline, and control.  So which is better?  For those with certain serious mental disorders, counseling even medication is advised.  But most people who come to therapy do not have serious mental disorders.  They are what is referred to as the “worried well.”  People with mild angst about life who just might benefit more from TKD than counseling. 

            So at the risk of sounding like some late night talk show, are the serious (and not so serious) . . .

Top Ten Reasons Why TKD is Better than Therapy:

Number 10: You get to hang out with a fun crowd.  Nothing is more dreary than group therapy especially when the group ends up just being a bunch of people who would rather complain than work on their problems.  TKD is a time when you get together with people who are serious about making themselves better and are interested in having some fun while they do it.

Number 9: You get to wear a cool uniform.  Okay so you could wear your Toe Balk to therapy, but you will most likely end up in a padded room if you do.   

Number 8: You get to yell a lot.  In therapy, we encourage crying not yelling.  Why?  I have no idea, but I think yelling may be a lot more helpful.  After a few CHIMBEEs, I always feel a little better. 

Number 7: You get a lot of genuine encouragement.  Your therapist may or may not encourage you, but your TKD instructor will.  Even when you make the smallest bit of progress, you will get his or her support.  You also get the support of your fellow students who are like you trying to master the skills of the sport. 

Number 6: It is a lot cheaper.  Individual therapy may cost anywhere from $75 to $100 an hour or more.  TKD should never cost more than $100 a month and you get a lot more “sessions.”

Number 5: You get to break things and no body arrests you.   Therapists get really nervous when people start breaking things.     

Number 4: You get some good exercise.  Studies have shown that moderate amounts of exercise may be just as effective in treating mild depression as anti-depressants.  Doing stretching exercises increases flexibility even in the elderly.  While it probably depends on the instructor, TKD certainly qualifies as moderate exercise and you get some great stretching.  Therapy, on the other hand, has never been confused for an aerobic exercise. 

Number 3: You learn that change takes time.  The very idea of consistently and patiently working towards goals is an anathema to most of the people who come to therapy.  They either don’t understand or face up to the fact that change requires both knowledge and skills.  Just because you know what to do does not mean that you have acquired the skill to do it.  You can learn all kinds of techniques to avoid overeating, for example, but you will never lose a pound until put that knowledge to use and make it a habit.  TKD has taught me that I can intellectually understand a kick but until I am willing to put in the practice, I will never “learn” the kick.  TKD teaches that getting better at anything takes commitment and practice.    

Number 2: You learn the value of self-discipline and control.  Therapists don’t like to talk about self-discipline (probably because so many of them lack it).  But as M. Scott Peck points out in the Road Less Traveled, self-discipline is the key to personal growth and happiness.  With complete self-discipline there are not limits.  The simple rituals of practice, the respect for each other and the instructor, the totality of the TKD experience teaches self-discipline and control.  You will never learn to control your kicks and punches until you learn to control yourself.

And the number one reason that TKD is better than therapy is---TKD is fun.  Getting together in an environment where you are encouraged, learning new things about yourself, and enjoying the company of your instructor and fellow students that is what makes TKD so much fun.  Therapy, as the saying goes, just can’t compete.