Caine's version of events as told to the Sumpfall Rag's best reporter:
Well we had heard that the Colony of Tatterenda had been seized from the rebel factions by the Spandex Militia, so thought we ought to go in and re-asserrt our claim, so we were on the outskirts when we bumped into the Militia, and the RAF who were obviously trying to return to the settlement.
All three gangs squared up for a fight, which we started. A well placed shot from Abel took down the RAF's leader with the opening shot. After that we traded shots with the Militia, we had the edge due to superior skills and equipment.
Our forward group was attacked by the infamous Pick who knocked Delius down before engaging Eridus. She was clearly as high as a kite. I charged in, didn't stop her but gave Eridus time to try out his new piece of kit - the powerfist - which shredded her dead easy.
Meanwhile, Abel, Corvinus and Mobius had climbed one of the towers and engaged one of their heavies, the leader and a few others in a shooting match. Their leader survived a direct hit from Abel which took us by surprise, but then thinking about it since the Militia are part of the shadow conspiracy against me, they must have daemonic support. Anyhow, Eridus and I charged her, but she was a coward and jumped back out of range leaving us in the open. Not that that stopped us any. Abel blew away two of them with a well aimed shot and we all opened fire on the leader and some of her minions. They went down like nine pins.
Meanwhile, Brutus, Marcus and others flanked them and started pinning them down. As it happens the RAF put down a couple of the Militia as well and they pegged it pronto. They were badly beaten, but not enough to drive them out of the settlement. After taking a few pot shots at us, the RAF retreated obviously ready to make another attack, so we too took stock and prepared for the next assault on the rebellious colony.
We found one of the Militia's heavies and executed her pronto nicking her gear. Felix then got weird on us (again), and wanted to barbeque her. I disagreed cos meat doesn't go with jelly and ice-cream. Felix argued back, but then he's always been one to get carried away with the lighter fuel at those barbeques of his, before he wandered off saying he was going to play with a box of matches. He hasn't been seen since. Not that it mattered, we recruited two new juves to replace the one we had lost to the RAF's fire, and another to replace Felix.
Looks like we're ready for the final assault now, better warn all the civies to keep out of the way. And better tell the Militia they better listen up and they better listen good cos the next time I say it, it ain't gonna be so nice:
Get out of Tatterenda !