January 26, 1999
NC-17
By: Lauren Spirit
Kids don’t need to read this, you’re too young!
Disclaimer: Paramount owns trek, and I made up Taya Osté. Deal with it.

Though hope is frail,
It’s hard to kill.
-Whitney Houstan and Mariah Carey. Prince of Egypt Soundtrack.

I sit and watch her, my cheerful emotions slowly drifting away. She isn’t going to come over here. It’s so rare that I speak with her now. I used to talk to her all the time. As she came onto the bridge with Chakotay, she would call out to me asking for a report. There was even one time she called me by my first name. The way she said it echoed through my dreams for many nights.

But then…oh then…Ensign Leilan was promoted and moved into my spot, while I was transferred to the science lab.

Oh gods, she just did the thing I love. She shifted her weight to the left leg and her hips swayed, then her hand drifted from her side and slid downwards. Wetness rushed through me at the thought of her hands on me. Mmm…If I keep thinking these thoughts, I may have to leave the party.

Ooh, the music has started. Chakotay has gone over and asked her to dance, like I knew he would. He never misses a moment to hold her, which is all the better for me. I know that I can never have her, although I always have hopes. Seeing the look on her face as she is in his arms is equally as pleasuring for me. I imagine that she would give me that look if I held her.

I gaze longingly at her breasts as she turns in my direction. Tonight I’ve let quite a bit of my own cleavage show in a teal dress. I want to give her a sight to see. Clearly Lt. Carey has seen it, for he is asking me to dance right now. He offers his hand and I take it, letting him pull me onto the dance floor.

We twirl to the music and dodge other couples, but I keep my eyes on her. She and Chakotay are in their own little world, they’re held in the lover’s lock, nothing exists but the pair of them. My heart weeps and my stomach clenches with jealousy. What I wouldn’t give to be Chakotay.

Carey senses that I’m not paying attention to him and his eyes turn to my interest.

"They’re quite a couple aren’t they, Taya?" he asks me.

I shiver and whisper back, "Oh yes."

Sighing, I lay my head on Carey’s chest, wrapping my arms tighter around him. My chest crushed against his stomach and I feel him gradually get hard as I do so.

Moments later, I feel someone brush up against me. My head rises and my eyes lock with the woman of my dreams.

"Sorry Taya," she says to me.

My heart jumps and a wave of passion tears through me as I hear her say my name for the second time.

"That’s all right," I manage to say. And as she and her lover drift away, I speak softly to myself, "do it anytime."

As the last lines of the song fade out, I thank Carey and walk slowly back to my seat. I really want to talk with her, but I don’t have anything to say. The party is already nearing the end and couples are already slowly filtering out. Then I remember that I was supposed to give her a report. Yes! It is the perfect object for a conversation starter.

Nervously, I get up and head toward her. Chakotay is standing against the far wall with his arms wrapped around her, and she is leaning on him. They are talking to Tom and B’Elanna. As I near them, her eyes flit to mine.

"Hi Taya," she says to me when I come to a stop.

I barely catch myself when I start to call her ‘Kathryn’ as I do in so many fantasies. "Good evening, Captain," I say instead, then I nod in the direction of the others. What am I doing? Mentally I smack myself. This is stupid. Oh well, I’m here now. I have to do something. They are looking at me, waiting for me to speak.

"Uhh…Captain, I finished that report that you said you wanted, earlier. Where should I submit it? You know I was just getting ready to leave and…" I stop, realizing that I am starting to drone.

The scent of her light perfume drifts over to my nose. Involuntarily, my eyes close and I breathe deeply.

"Oh, the science report?"

I nod.

Her eyes brighten. She loves science. "You can just run it by my quarters and lay it on my desk. I’m looking forward to reading it."

I can’t help but smile at the enthusiasm in her voice. "Of course, Captain."

An uncomfortable pause follows.

"Well," I say, "I should be going now. I have early shift. Goodnight all of you."

I start to walk away and I feel her eyes following me. Why does she do that? It really turns me on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Picking up the report from my quarters, I glance in the mirror. My face is flushed. My hands are shaking. Damn, that woman is wonderful.

I arrive at her quarters and go directly to her desk, laying the report down. Realizing that have never been in her quarters before, I decide to look around for a second. Like a kid in an amusement park, I go from place to place, fingering objects and gazing at the things that make up her life.

A holo-image of her and Chakotay embracing on beautiful planet is set on her coffee table. They look so happy…

My head jerks up and I hear someone keying entry into the door. I dive behind one of her plush chairs just as two people enter the room.

"Mmm…that party was fun Chakotay. But I’m ready for some real fun now."

I look around the edge of the chair and see her walk over to the desk. "It looks like Lt. Osté has been here already, but her report can wait until in the morning."

She giggles as Chakotay hoists her up onto the desk and kisses her. His hands move to the zipper of her dress and pull it down slowly.

His lips move to her collarbone and gently nip at her skin. She smiles as he moves to tease her nipple with his thumb, while his mouth suckles on the other.

I suppress a moan as I watch them together. They’re so perfectly matched. The only one that could love her near as much as Chakotay does, is me. Unfortunately for yours truly: it won’t happen.

I hear soft whimpers as his fingers slowly rub the sensitive flesh between her legs. At the warm feel of his hands, a shiver takes her body. "Oh Chakotay," she whispers as her arms struggle to hold her in a sitting position on the desk. Soon, the passion grew too high and her arms no longer held, causing her to collapse on the desk. She looks up at him from her laying position and he grins saucily.

"This would be nice," he says, "However, I think you would prefer the bed." She nods and lets him pick her up in his arms.

I see them coming towards me and I crawl to the other side of the chair quickly but quietly, omitting detection.

He carries her into the bedroom and lightly lays her body down on the bed. His hands slide down the length of her sides and back up, caressing her hips, her belly, the outer swell of her breasts. He cups their fullness, brushing his thumbs again over and around their sensitive crests.

She shivers for a second time and catches her breath shallowly. Chakotay’s was an unhurried, tantalizing exploration. He pauses, then his hands return to her breasts and his thumb traces lightly, ever so lightly over her breast’s swelling apex.

She breathes in sharply, the incredible sensation tightening, centering in the very core of her being.

My own breath comes in rasps. I don’t know if I can take much more of this. It’s driving me mad watching them.

She looks up at him and notices that he still has his clothes on. Her hands come up to pull his shirt off, then she begins to undo his trousers. I cannot see Chakotay’s expression, but I’m almost sure he’s grinning at her insistent manor. Soon, he is rid of all clothing, and she stares at him openly and hungrily.

She reaches for him again, and strokes him hesitantly first, then boldly, imitating the movements of his hands. They are both breathless and aching, quivering near the edge, I can see it. He stretches himself over her, positioning. Drawing her hands alongside her shoulders, he holds her beneath him, trembling. And then he groans and thrusts into her taking her to himself.

Chakotay’s body begins to move. He thrusts deeply, rhythmically, piercing her body, filling her with himself. She groans and rides with him as the heat and wanting sweep them, as they spiral beyond need, shattering together into the immense, satisfying oblivion of a perfect, trusting pleasure.

~~~~~~~~~

She lays in his arms contently, softly sleeping. I decide to make my exit now. Silently, I sneak from the chair, to the couch, and to the table by the door. My stomach glides across the floor as I reach the door. I key the entry open and slip out unnoticed.

In the hall I sigh. That was close. Too close. But the show I got was very nice. Remembering, I walk back to my quarters and stumble into bed.

As I close my eyes, visions of her fill my mind. Though hope is frail, it’s hard to kill I guess. I will never get over her.

Finis

Kathryn will climax times!

~

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