Asylum BZ34

Asylum BZ34

Where the strange just get stranger

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. > Words of Wisdom

> > 1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead.
> Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow.
> Do not walk beside me, either.
> Just leave me the hell alone.

> > 2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt > and a leaky tyre.

> > 3. It's always darkest before dawn.
> So if you're going to steal the neighbour's newspaper, that's > the time to do it

> > 4. Sex is like air; it's not important unless you aren't getting > any.

> > 5. We are born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things get worse.

> > 6. No one is listening until you make a mistake.

> > 7. Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

> > 8. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

> > 9. It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as > a warning to others.

> > 10. It is far more impressive when others discover your good > qualities without your help.

> > 11. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a > couple of car payments.

> > 12. If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.

> > 13. If you lend someone 20 pounds, and never see that person > again; it was probably worth it.

> > 14. Never mess up an apology with an excuse.

> > 15. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day.
> Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink > beer all day.

> > 16. Some days you are the fly, some days you are the windshield.

> > 17. Don't worry, it only seems kinky the first time.

> > 18. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

> > 19. Good judgement comes from bad experience and a lot of that > comes from bad judgement.

> > 20. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half > and put it back in your pocket.

> > 21. Timing has an awful lot to do with the outcome of a raindance.

> > 22. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

> > 23. Duct tape is like the force, it has a light side and a dark > side and it holds the universe together.

> > 24. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet > engines.

> > 25. Before you criticise someone, you should walk a mile in their > shoes.
That way, when you criticise them, you're a mile away and you > have their shoes.

> > 26. Experience is something you don't get until just after you > need it.

> > 27. Don't be irreplaceable; if you can't be replaced, you can't be > promoted.

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