by: Dacia
BtVS / Angel
This is a f/f fic with just about every female character from both shows.
PG-13/R
The rating depends entirely on how dirty a mind you have.
WARNING : There is definitely something going on in this story, and I think/hope it's got a f/f vibe to it.
DISCLAIMER : I do not own the characters of BtVS, nor of Angel: The Series, they belong to Joss Whedon, Fox, Mutant Enemy, Kuzui… and anyone else with an army of lawyers to back them up. And without the benefit of hallucinogens, I am unable to foresee a future where I will profit in any way from this story.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS : I would apologize to the makers of Vaseline for misrepresenting their product if I thought that was remotely true…
SPOILERS : There really aren't any. This story is well and truly detached from the realities of the Buffy-verse. There is one mention of the Season 5 well-fare of Buffy's mom, but I'd like to think that I heal, rather than create any headaches, with this.
"Yo, B! Could you hand me that towel? Things are getting a little messy here."
"Sure thing, Faith." Buffy paused long enough in her ministrations to pass the article in question.
"Hey! No hogging!"
"You had your turn, Willow." Buffy said absently, as she concentrated on the girl before her.
Faith, the object of Buffy's attentions, smirked and stuck out her tongue, "Why don't you take care of your girlfriend first before you start horning in, okay Red?" The Boston native flinched suddenly, "Ow! Watch the hands, B. That area's wicked sensitive."
"Whatever."
"Um, how much longer?" Came a quiet question.
"Just a couple more minutes, Tara." Buffy mumbled, engrossed in her work.
Willow observed the slayers' progress, "Whoa, Faith! Green? I never woulda pegged ya for a 'green' girl."
"Look who's talking 'Red'." Faith threw her a knowing look.
"This grows tedious, when are you going to do me?" A previously quiet Anya stated from her position on the couch.
"After we've done Buffy. Don't worry, everybody gets a turn." Faith reassured her.
"And you're sure Xander said this is okay?"
"Everything's 5x5, Sweetcheeks. Now let's switch positions." She said to Buffy.
There was a worried interjection and Tara raised her hand, "Um-- "
"Oh no! Tara's dripping again! Quick! Get a towel before she stains the rug!" Willow exclaimed.
"Sorry." The blonde witch mumbled, embarrassed.
"No worries, happens to the best of us." Faith grinned. "Hey B, quit squirming, will ya?"
"Sorry, but do you have to use so much Vaseline?" The blonde slayer shifted nervously.
"Trust me, I've got experience in these matters." She dipped her hand into the pot.
"She's right. You'll be thankful for the Vaseline when she's done, Faith doesn't have the world's best aim." Willow commented sagely.
"Time's up you two." Faith announced in pseudo-retaliation, "Hit the showers." Willow and Tara shared a wide grin and scampered up the stairs.
"And remember to wash all those hard to reach places!" The dark slayer yelled after them.
"Mind if we join in? Or this an exclusive engagement?" Came a familiar voice from the threshold of the Summers' home.
"Cordy!"
"Who's your friend?" Buffy asked, looking at the attractive, denim-clad blonde beside the former cheerleader.
Faith squinted, "Hey, I know you, you're Lady Cop. I heard you haven't been around much lately."
"I've been tied up." The blonde deadpanned, then quirked a grin at her brunette companion.
"What an interesting picture." Anya licked her lips.
"It would be, but Kate and I haven't developed the film yet." Cordelia replied seriously. Kate elbowed her, and the sometimes actress bit her lip, "Uh, I mean, heh--heh, that was a metaphor, uh, for something else, cuz I didn't mean that literally… nuh-uh, I don't even own a camera. In fact, I'm not even sure what one looks like."
"Okay… am I the only one in a scary visual place?" Buffy queried the room.
"I dunno, I kinda like the view." Faith paused in her efforts and leered openly. Buffy hit her.
"C'mon in you two, make yourselves comfortable." The blonde slayer invited.
"And take off your shirts or they won't do you." Anya added helpfully.
"I'm afraid you missed most of the major action." Faith mentioned as she returned her attention to Buffy.
The blonde slayer leaned into her touch, "Mmm… Faith, while you're at it, could you just flex your fingers a little, and-- oh yah-- that's the way, and maybe swirl them around a bit…"
"Well, at least we'll catch the highlights." Kate drawled sensuously as she and the brunette sat on the couch next to Anya.
"Is it just me, or is there a whole lotta giggling going on upstairs?" Cordelia's forehead scrunched up in consternation.
"That's just Willow and Tara. They're rinsing off in the shower." Buffy responded idly, with an almost purr. The slayer leaned over suddenly to hand them a jar, "Here, why don't you two prep each other, Faith's insists on the Vaseline."
"Better safe than sorry." The dark slayer shrugged, and continued to minister to the blonde.
The door to the Summers' residence creaked open a second time.
"Mom! You're home!" Buffy sat up straight, pleasantly surprised, and ran over to hug her.
Joyce returned the hug, but remarked, "Buffy-- You're all sticky."
Buffy pulled back, "Sorry, Faith's fault." She looked at the older woman for a moment, just happy to see her, but a shadow of confusion crossed her face, "But wait a sec, how can you be home? What about the cancer?"
"Oh that, turns out the doctors were wrong, I just had an airplane peanut caught in my sinus cavity from that flight I took to Chicago for the gallery, you know, the one with all the turbulence."
Buffy nodded as if this all made sense.
"Anyway, looks like you girls are pretty busy…" Joyce glanced at Kate and Cordelia, who were now shirtless and rubbing Vaseline on each other. "… I'll leave you all to it… try not to stain the rug. And Faith?" She called to the dark slayer who was resting on the carpet.
"Yah, Mrs. S?"
"Put my Vaseline back when you're done okay?" She smiled.
"Gotcha." Faith winked.
The End
Please take a moment to:
Cuz she's "... always depended on the kindness of strangers..."
There's no place like home