Rating: PG
Pairings: QG/OW
Status: Complete
Date: 10/24/99
Series/Sequel: No
Category: Series: Alternate Universe, First Time, Romance
Forsaking all Others
Disclaimers: George owns them but I went and asked him nicely and he
told me I could borrow them. No money or profit was made.
Thank you Heidi, Virg for whipping this into something presentable.
Thanks also to my front line alpha readers Hawk, Wolfling and Indigo.
Although this is NOT a story in Anne Higgins' Bonding Universe, I want
to thank her for firing my imagination.
Summary: Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan have a bond. Spoilers for TPM and JA
books, just the teeniest bit. // // indicates telepathy.
The council door swung open smoothly.
"Enter Padawan Kenobi."
"Yes Masters."
Entering the chamber, Obi-Wan walked to the exact center of the of the
tower room and stood before the twelve members of the jedi council.
"Done well, have you Knight Kenobi." Yoda's warbled tones pronounced.
Replaying the sentence, a huge smile broke out on Obi-Wan Kenobi's
face. He was a knight. "Thank you Masters." Not hearing a dismissal,
Obi Wan waited.
"Know that in the last weeks, you have exceeded our expectations,
Kenobi." Depe Billoba's voice stated confidently.
"But there is still one more test to be faced." Master Adi Gallia chimed
in.
Warily Obi looked at the group before him. He was a little confused.
Yoda had addressed him as a knight but there was still another trial.
Sighing quietly, he released his tension, "Yes my Masters. I await your
will."
"A matter of worry this is not." Yoda proclaimed. "A matter of jedi
privacy, it is. Wait we did until you were ready."
Obi-Wan remained centered, allowing the voices to flow around him. As
was his wont recently, he checked his bond with Qui-Gon. It remained
strong and through it, he could feel the twinges of impatience as his
former master fretted to be released from the infirmary. He also felt
something else, a hitherto unknown wall in an area of his master's
mind. He had not discovered it until a few moments ago. It had not
been there this morning when he went to the infirmary. All had been
well when Master Windu came to the infirmary to tell him he was summoned
before the council. He had been chatting with Anakin, relating to the
padawan learner some amusing tales from his master's travels. Whatever
the blockage was hiding, it had been constructed recently. Since their
bond remained strong, it was not health related. Obi-Wan planned to
have a long conversation with his master after this meeting.
"Open your mind we must."
Obi-Wan blinked and brought his awareness back to the present.
"O..Open?" he stuttered.
"Yes Knight Kenobi." Mace Windu's calm tones assured him. "The Code
does not allow us to discuss pair-bonds before knighthood."
Focusing on Master Windu, Obi-Wan extracted the one word that made
sense, "Bonds?" The knight protested, "But I'm already bonded to Master
Jinn. I had hoped that in time that would lead to...more," he finished
quietly.
"Usually it does Kenobi, but in your situation it will not," Windu
said.
"Broken that bond will be." Yoda said from his perch.
"What? Why?" Every mental shield Obi-Wan had slammed up like a speared
fence around his bond to Qui-Gon.
"You are already soul bonded, Kenobi." Sitting forward in his chair,
Mace continued, "Though a jedi usually bonds when he becomes a knight
and almost always to another knight or master, bonding can occur at any
time."
Obi-Wan nodded. He remembered Pre'Vin, a padawan three years ahead of
him, who bonded to an older Knight when he was seventeen standard
years. The Knight had been serving on an outer rim planet. When he
returned to the jedi temple he had run into Pre'Vin in the arboretum.
Within days the two had gone before the council to declare their bond.
Obi-Wan and his friends had been envious when the council gave
permission for Pre'Vin to dissolve his training bond to his Master and
travel back to the outer rim with his soulmate.
"In rare cases, a jedi bonds as a child. You bonded when you were two.
When you return to your quarters, you will find data cubes that you may
study. Kneel before us Knight Kenobi."
Grappling with the fact that he was bonded to someone, Obi-Wan Kenobi
dropped to his knees protesting. "Bonded already? Why wasn't I told?
Who is it?"
"Release your shields you will." Yoda commanded.
Grasping onto the only sanity he had, as he had years ago on Bandomeer
and more recently on Naboo, he locked himself onto Qui-Gon and refused
to let go.
In the silence of the circular temple, an epic mental battle was joined.
Across a vast distance, he heard Master Yoda's voice repeat, "Strong in
the force he is."
Eyes clenched shut, Obi-Wan fought to protect his bond from being ripped
away.
Slowly, inexorably, the might of the council came to bear on the lone
mind blazing defiantly in the center of the room.
\\Let go Obi-Wan. Your soulmate awaits.\\
Like a deeply rooted vine, the peeling of the bond from the young
knight's mind was not without pain. "No." Obi screamed his denial.
\\It is the will of the Force, Knight Kenobi.\\ Had Obi-Wan not been
locked in a mental battle, he could have identified each telepathic
signature in his mind and as a padawan had done several tests to do just
that.
\\The training bond must be removed so the soul bond may be
acknowledged, Kenobi.\\
\\Why are you doing this? I do not WANT another bond.\\
\\Already a bond there is. Expose it we must.\\
The training bond tore free and in so doing a vast space was uncovered
in Obi-Wan Kenobi's mind.
Not cognizant, writhing mentally from the pain of losing his bond to
Qui-Gon, the knight screamed his anguish on every level, "Master!!!"
Twenty eight levels down in the jedi temple, Qui-Gon Jinn woke from an
uneasy mental trance. His padawan needed him.
Opening his eyes hurt. Obi-Wan looked down at himself.
He was still kneeling in front of the council. His cream robes fell
smoothly around him. After the mental war he had just waged, he felt
that he should show some ill effects. His clothing should be in shreds
to match his inner state.
Mace Windu stood and walked to the knight. Extending a hand, he helped
the young man up. "Welcome to the order, Knight Kenobi."
The young man stood next to the larger jedi master. He was still
heart-sore and mentally bruised from his recent encounter. "No wonder
you don't tell initiates." He bit out sarcastically. Remembering where
he was, he clamped down on his speech.
"I am sorry Knight Kenobi, your training bond was very strong." Mace
apologized formally. Like a youngster poking at an emerging tooth, Obi
turned his mind inward and focused on what was there. Where the
training bond had been, there was a -- wall. Startled he asked, "What
is that?"
"Your soul bond, you feel." Yoda answered.
Obi-Wan was confused and looked towards Mace Windu for an explanation.
Sometimes Yoda spoke in riddles and it was not worth another headache at
the moment.
"But Master Windu, all I feel is a wall..."
For the first time in living memory, Obi-Wan Kenobi had the experience
of seeing a Master become embarrassed. Hesitating Windu tried to
explain, "A soul bond is very personal thing to the parties concerned,
Obi-Wan. What you experience is not what another will."
"Read the data cubes he must." Yoda said firmly and closed the
conversation.
Taking that last statement to be a dismissal, Obi-Wan turned to exit the
room.
"Kenobi."
"Yes, Master Windu."
"This belongs to you."
Looking down at the Windu's open palm, Obi-Wan saw a flash of red-gold.
It was his padawan braid.
Not knowing what else to do, he took it from the master's hand and
stuffed it into a fold in his robe.
"Go to your room Knight Kenobi and all will be clear."
Obi-Wan Kenobi left the council chambers. It was the first time since
returning from Naboo that he went to his quarters without first checking
on Qui-Gon in the infirmary.
The request for an audience with the council was not wholly unexpected
Qui-Gon Jinn assisted by Healer Tolkth entered the chamber. "Where is
Obi-Wan?"
Sighing, Yoda slipped down from his perch on the chair, "Stubborn they
both are. Suit each other well they do." With those words. Yoda
signaled silently to the jedi council. Tolkth, Qui-Gon and Mace waited
until the room cleared.
Using the Force, Mace checked his friend. He could feel the faint
thread of force-enhanced support the healer was using to assist his
friend.
"Let us talk, Qui-Gon."
Still easily winded, Qui-Gon acquiesced and the two men and one
Haileeain moved to the sealed windows on the periphery of the council
chambers. They sat on one of the thirteen padded benches that ranged
around the circumference of the tower at precise distances from each
other.
"What happened, Mace?" Qui-Gon Jinn asked. "I felt as if Obi-Wan was
being ripped from my mind."
Sighing, Mace confirmed. "It was difficult to remove the training
bond. Very difficult."
"So you shredded his mind?"
"WE did not shred his mind and you know it Qui-Gon Jinn. How else would
we have exposed the soul bond?"
That statement rendered the recuperating jedi silent. Casting a glance
at the healer near his shoulder, Mace nodded. "Healer Tolkth, I will
supplement him. Please wait outside until summoned."
The two men waited as the slender healer left the chambers quickly.
"Qui-Gon, we would have waited if we could."
"I know Mace, but he wasn't ready. I wasn't ready."
Strangely this statement produced a short bark of laughter from the
dark-skinned Windu, "Ready? What does ready have to do with it?"
Shaking his head, he continued, "Do you remember your trials? Your
first realization of who your soul mate was? You have only been waiting
for your soul mate for most of his life."
Grumbling, Qui-Gon muttered, "Yes, but I at least knew what was
happening."
Discussing the bond required tact and delicacy, "Obi-Wan mentioned he
felt a wall."
"I have not yet removed my barrier. I felt that I should wait until
later...until he knew."
"Do not wait too long, my friend. Anakin needs to establish his
training bond with you, quickly and the imperative of the soul bond must
be met even before that." Mace cut in.
"I know all my responsibilities, but I will not force something on
Obi-Wan which he does not want." Qui-Gon snapped drawing strongly on the
force from his year mate.
"Qui-Gon, he is your soul mate. You're not forcing anything on him. It
is something he wants."
"Eventually...yes. But to be told this way."
"It is the code. It prevents us from speaking freely."
"Have I told you my precise opinion of the code?"
"All too frequently." Mace Windu sent a discreet mind call to Healer
Tolkth. The Haileeain entered quietly. "Take him to his quarters.
Knight Kenobi will take over there." Facing Qui-Gon, Mace stressed.
"Rest my friend, but not too long. Anakin needs you."
The faint energy transference was accomplished quickly and the council
chambers fell silent. The lone master silhouetted in the dull glow of
Coruscant's continuous air traffic closed his eyes and waited.
Obi-Wan entered his quarters. It was a tribute to how deeply Jedi
training went that he obeyed Master Windu and went there first.
Swerving past the open door to Qui-Gon Jinn's neat quarters, he suddenly
discovered one question uppermost in his brain, 'Where would his new
quarters be? With his soul mate, whomever that was?' Carefully he
examined the question, aware of the delaying tactic that it was. With
that thought surfacing, he automatically sent his mind questing along a
well remembered path, only to slam into a mental wall. His training
bond was gone. In it's place was...Obi-Wan forced down the gibbering
anxiety he felt. It was unbecoming of a jedi. Still the mental turmoil
remained as well as an impenetrable wall which had replaced his warm,
textured bond with his master.
Was it only a short time ago he had been pacing outside the Council
Chamber, his padawan braid slapping his shoulder on each turn? He had
been going through his trials for the last five days and he was becoming
impatient. This was not what he wanted to be doing right now. After
defeating the Sith and rescuing a badly wounded Qui-Gon, he had been the
only one who managed to be surprised when his trials were moved up.
When Yoda pried him away from the infirmary, Qui-Gon was breathing on
his own and he had been told that he was considered ready for his
trials. The former gave him more happiness than the latter.
He wanted to share with Qui-Gon the irony about the changes a small
confrontation with a Sith lord wrought. Only Qui-Gon would be amused
his very understated reference to the life changing battle with the Sith
as a small confrontation. But his master was no longer with him. First
he had been gently pushed from Qui-Gon's side by Anakin's constant
presence and the jedi council's edict. While Qui-Gon mended in a bacta
tank and young Anakin Skywalker remained pressed nose to cylindrical
surface, he was being tested in the five languages and ancient beliefs
of the Cathmayrn, the hierarchy of the Mon Calamari power structure and
for small breaks, neutralizing deadly tinctures introduced into his
body. Somehow, though, he found the time to visit the infirmary every
morning before starting his tests for the day, and every evening, tired
after a day of exhaustive testing, it was his last stop before heading
to his quarters. It had been deemed wise to keep Anakin close to
Qui-Gon after his master emerged from the tank and the young padawan
learner had been given a cot in the infirmary two days ago.
Reflecting on his trials, he decided that they had been easy. Even his
last test, yesterday, the Test of Inner Self, had not been difficult.
After facing in the flesh evil personified, as a Sith lord, and facing
his greatest fear, that of losing his master to the force, Obi-Wan
Kenobi was able to stand before his innermost fears with equanimity.
The worst had happened and he lived to tell about it. Had the events of
Naboo not happened, that test would have been a true test. He still
remembered that terrifying moment after defeating the Sith when Qui-Gon
tried to sever their training bond. Obi-Wan had held on for all he was
worth and yanked his master back from death to a deep healing coma.
While Qui-Gon traveled back to Coruscant in a spaceship with nondescript
markings, but staffed with a full complement of force healers, Obi-Wan
stood near Anakin, and with Yoda and Mace Windu's help, had perpetrated
a massive conspiracy. Only the constant presence of the training bond
in his mind, weak though it was, gave the young padawan the strength to
watch an effigy of his master burning atop a pyre. Through it all,
Obi-Wan measured the strength of his master's progress by their
connection. And now it was gone.
However, he had a duty to his former master, training bond or no.
Walking to the communications console, he accessed the infirmary.
The wizened face of Healer Barta, who bore an uncanny resemblance to
Yoda, answered the comm. "Yes, Knight."
A vague thrill warred with unease at being so addressed...so many
changes. "I am inquiring about the status of Master Jinn."
"Master Jinn has been released from the infirmary."
Barta closed his eyes for a moment and his ears lifted, "He is on his
way to his quarters, Knight Kenobi."
"Uh?"
Believing their conversation to be over, Barta closed off his end of the
link leaving Obi-Wan staring at a blinking comm light. Qui-Gon was
coming here! To his quarters! Now! Galvanized by this thought,
Obi-Wan moved quickly to his Master's--no, not his Master's--Anakin's
Master's room. Giving up that problematic train of thought. He would
deal with it soon enough. But first he had to tidy Qui-Gon Jinn's
room. A scant few minutes later he was casting a critical eye over the
pristine quarters. Not that he had that much to do in the room.
Qui-Gon had not occupied it since leaving for Naboo.
Finishing the simple chore, Obi-Wan stood near the entrance to his room
and waited for his former master. Still, he was unprepared for the
chime. ? Sending out a questing tendril, he identified two people
outside the chamber, one was Qui-Gon's unique signature. Why hadn't
Qui-Gon just walked into his quarters?
'There is only serenity.' Mangling a familiar mantra, Obi-Wan allowed
entrance. The door split and slid smoothly apart.
"Master?"
Qui-Gon Jinn bowed formally, "Knight Kenobi, may I enter?"
It was only in that moment that Obi-Wan believed he was truly a knight.
"Mas...err..." Stumbling over the form of address the newly elevated
knight caught the sparkle in Qui-Gon's eyes. It was the sparkle that
made everything normal.
Qui-Gon Jinn stood just outside the doorway to the set of rooms he had
occupied with the boy for the last ten years. A small smile escaped the
shapely lips as he waited for his former apprentice to collect himself.
After a moment, he sent a discreet force prod to Obi-Wan. "Err, yes.
Enter Master."
Healer Tolkth entered behind Qui-Gon, "Knight Kenobi?"
Obi-Wan tried to gather his scattered thoughts. The last time he had
seen Qui-Gon Jinn upright was just prior to being stabbed by a horned
Sith lord. Seeing him that way now just barely banished those awful
memories of him holding his master in his arms, feeling the older man's
life force ebbing rapidly, while he frantically poured all his mental
energies into repairing the saber wound.
"Kenobi?" Tolkth repeated.
"Ye...yes sir,"
"Master Jinn requires your assistance."
Obi-Wan peered at Qui-Gon. His master, former master he corrected
mentally, did appear pale.
Tolkth sighed, "The force."
The young knight sharpened his vision and saw the wavy tendrils of force
flowing from Tolkth to Qui-Gon. "Oh, yes. Yes, Master."
Qui-Gon waited in silence while the transfer occurred. Supported now by
Obi-Wan, he waited until the healer left before speaking, "Damned
healers."
Obi-Wan grinned conspiratorially, "That was not what you described them
as the last time we spent some time in the infirmary."
"Don't throw my words at me Padawan. You had just been bitten by an
esterriche." Qui-Gon referred to a particularly virulent snake-like
animal on Dagobah.
Unrepentant, Obi-Wan continued, "I think the words you used were
considerably more complimentary."
A reluctant smile flitted across Qui-Gon's lips. "They were needed
then."
"And I guess they weren't needed just now?"
Obi-Wan brought his hand up to brush the dark material covering the
recently healed wound. His fingers came within a hairsbreadth before he
remembered. His hand dropped quickly. "I no longer have the training
bond."
"I know, Obi-Wan. I felt it's removal."
Qui-Gon Jinn, bonded to an infant some twenty one years ago hesitated.
There was so much to say to the young man before him. So much he would
have said before this, had the code not prevented it. The older jedi
walked toward the wide couch slowly. It was the only furniture in their
central area. The extra space had been commandeered years ago to
provide extra lessons to his padawan.
He sat. "Come Pa...Obi-Wan, we must speak."
Obi-Wan dropped to his knees and sat back on his heels while he waited
for his Mas...former Master to speak. "You're my Master," the kneeling
man blurted. He was unhappy with the changes.
"Yes Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan was reminded of countless conversations like these. His master
waiting patiently while his padawan sorted out the confusion in his mind
to ask a coherent question. "I can't call you my former Master. You
are, but..."
"Do you have a problem with Qui-Gon?"
Obi-Wan was startled. That idea was so...radical. "Er...no,
Ma...Qui-Gon."
"My Qui-Gon," the seated jedi mused. "That has a nice ring to it."
A flush of red traveled across Obi-Wan's cheeks. "No Master!"
"I am not your Qui-Gon?"
Obi-Wan was inarticulate.
The jedi master decided to stop teasing. "We must talk Obi-Wan."
The young knight nodded.
"Mace Windu came to visit me this morning. He told me that I needed to
form a new training bond with Anakin."
"I understand Master Jinn." Obi-Wan chose the most formal address to
make up for his earlier mistake.
"No you do not. After my trials, when I was knighted, I looked forward
to forming a pair bond with Mace. I believed that we would be as other
jedi pairs and travel together as mates. It was not to be. My first
assignment was to Alderaan. While there, I wandered into the nursery
one day by accident and I found my soulmate. A two year old toddler who
walked up to this strange man standing in the doorway and invited him to
play with his taun-tauns." Qui-Gon looked his former padawan.
Obi-Wan's green gold eyes had widened to their fullest extent. All the
hectic red color had leached from his face and he was now pale.
"Me?" Obi-Wan whispered.
"You were two. I had to leave Alderaan, leave you with your parents.
The Code is very specific in cases like ours. Your -- our -- soul bond
had to be suppressed."
Obi-Wan muttered something. If possible the young knight was even paler
now than before.
"What was that?"
"Bandomeer?" Obi-Wan's expression was anguished. "We were soul bonded
already and you rejected me at Bandomeer. Why?"
Before Qui-Gon could answer, the kneeling jedi continued. "Even now,
there is a wall in my mind." Clumsily, he stumbled to his feet. "I
will go to the council Qui-Gon. If a training bond can be ripped away,
an almost dead soul bond should not be a problem."
"Obi-Wan wait." But Qui-Gon found himself talking to air as his former
padawan left the suite abruptly cutting off his force support. Suddenly
bereft of the augmented support, the jedi master slumped back onto the
couch and wavered close to unconsciousness.
Obi-Wan sat in the arboretum. It was deserted at this time of day. All
the students were in their classes. The masters went about their duties
unaware of the turmoil emanating from one force-trained mind...all but
one.
"Sit here shall I?"
Obi Wan looked up from his contemplation of a bunch of rondenzenne
flowers. The tightly clustered pink and green florets reminded him of
home.
"Yes, Master Yoda."
Yoda crabbed upward and sat on the stone bench next to Obi Wan. The two
jedi sat in silence until Obi-Wan finally burst out, "He rejected me."
"Reasons had he, ask him you did?"
"No Master Yoda." After another silence, the young knight asked,
"Master Yoda, can the soul bond be removed?"
"Soul bond is."
"You did it before."
"Remove it we did not, mask it we did."
Obi-Wan Kenobi lapsed back into silence and tried to accept his new
knowledge.
In the temple, Mace Windu who had been monitoring Qui-Gon through the
thinnest filament of awareness, suddenly lost contact. "Sith Hells."
Moving swiftly to the communications console, he rang through to the
infirmary. "Healer Barta, please summon Tolkth to Qui-Gon Jinn's
quarters."
Mace did not wait for the response. In a flurry of brown and cream
flowing around his tall form, he rushed from the echoing chamber.
Obi-Wan was in turmoil. Seeking a peaceful center was impossible.
"Master Yoda, what do I do now?"
A rumbled interrogative was his reply. "Hrrrrr?"
The young knight was resentful but he explained, "I don't want this soul
bond to someone who doesn't want me. I...I had feelings for my master.
I believed that once I became a knight I might have a different type of
relationship with him. But he betrayed me."
Yoda's ears stood almost vertical to his head. "Know him you do.
Betrayed you were not."
"But, Master..."
"Go to him you must."
Obi-Wan stared at the ancient jedi as if he had taken leave of his
senses. He opened his mouth to protest that order but Yoda's eyes were
closed, his chin leaning on his short cane and he appeared to
meditating. The young knight subsided. From long experience, he knew
that he would get no more conversation from his master's master.
Sighing, he stood. Master Yoda had commanded. He lived to obey.
Taking the long route back to his quarters, Obi-Wan thought about Yoda's
words. The little green gnome, which was the most polite wording he
could use in his present frame of mind, was always right. He did know
Qui-Gon. The man had been his master for ten years. There was no area
of his life where the older man had not welcomed him. What was so
different about his situation now? He had fostered a quiet hope that he
and Qui-Gon would pair-bond, but he was already bonded to his former
master. He should not be upset. It was after all what he desired. He,
at least owed Qui-Gon the courtesy of listening.
Turning the corner, he saw the door to his quarters open. "What?"
Suddenly he remembered. He had been left abruptly yanking the force
support he had been providing to Qui-Gon. Skidding to a stop at his
open doorway, Obi-Wan took in activity in the main room.
"Qui-Gon!"
Qui-Gon lay full length along the couch. Tolkth stood at his head, Mace
at his feet. Their both stood in meditative postures with their heads
bent. Obi-Wan stood helpless while the two masters generated healing
energy and fed it directly to his Master. Uncounted moments later, both
jedi moved away from Qui-Gon's supine form.
"He will sleep now. He has entered a healing trance." Tolkth said.
"Thank you Tolkth." Windu murmured.
Drawn to Qui-Gon's still form, Obi-Wan walked to the couch and dropped
to his knees. Looking up at Mace Windu from his position near Qui-Gon's
head, he asked, "When will he wake?"
"In a short while. He will be much better then."
Held back from leaving by the misery emanating from the kneeling knight,
Mace offered, "I was with him when he went on his mission to Alderaan.
He left a part of himself with you on that planet all those years ago.
He's been waiting a long time to get it back."
The door hissed shut. Windu's last glance was of a bent red gold head
close to Qui-Gon's darker locks.
It was the movement under his cheek that woke him. Obi-Wan raised his
head and blinked, "Master, you're awake."
As Qui-Gon moved into an upright position swinging his legs to the floor
and turning his body so that his back rested against the plush couch,
the younger knight scrubbed his cheek. He felt the slight indentations
where Qui-Gon's hair had imprinted on his cheek.
"Mas...."
"Obi...." Both men stopped at the same time and smiled.
"You first, Obi-Wan."
The young knight took a moment to gather his thoughts together then
realized he wanted to hear what Qui-Gon had to say, "No. You." Rising
up a little on his knees, he touched the older jedi's arm, remembering
at the last moment to drop the Master honorific, "Please talk to me,
Qui-Gon."
Looking into the middle distance, the older jedi began speaking, "It
took me by surprise. I had never heard of a bonding occurring between
two jedi with such a great disparity in years. After the bond formed, I
spent two days with you on Alderaan. They were glorious. You
introduced me to all your haunts and we talked about clouds. Mace
completed the entire mission without me. I did not want to leave."
Qui-Gon smiled. He could see traces of the younger Obi-Wan in the
knight kneeling next to him--most noticeable were his remarkable eyes.
"Mace tested you. Your midi-chlorian levels were high and it was
determined that you would come to Coruscant the following year."
Qui-Gon patted the space next to him. Obi-Wan rose gracefully and sat
next to the older man conscious to leave some space between them. "Upon
returning to the temple, the first thing I did was have a 'discussion'
with my Master."
Obi-Wan chuckled. He had been witnessed a few discussions between Yoda
and Qui-Gon. He was sure that specific chat so many years ago had been
one of the more remarkable ones.
"He handed me a set of data cubes and told me to read them."
Another soft chuckle erupted, "He said the same thing to me."
"I can save you some time." Qui-Gon's said wryly. "Don't read them.
Our particular situation was summed up in one line among thousands. As
the older jedi, I must wait until you are ready."
Qui-Gon shifted and dropped his arm around Obi-Wan, drawing the younger
knight closer. "All I knew then was the unrelenting mental anguish I
felt which I had felt since our ship entered hyperspace for Coruscant.
I couldn't concentrate. It felt as if I had been ripped apart. Through
our bond I knew you were inconsolable. I felt your pain pulling at
me." He swallowed with difficulty. "I was ineffective as a jedi. The
jedi council came to a decision. They had to blunt the pain--so they
blocked my soul bond to you. Yoda went to Alderaan immediately to do
the same for you."
Qui-Gon allowed his head to fall back against the upper curve of the
couch. "Ten years later you were ready to be chosen as a padawan. I
did not want to form a bond with you. I remembered that pain
Obi-Wan...." He removed his arm from around the younger man's shoulder,
instead grasping Obi-Wan's hands. "I am sorry I hurt you then Obi-Wan.
The jedi council had not dealt with a situation like ours in more than a
hundred years. We did not know if the training bond would form or if
the soul bond would reassert itself. You were still an adolescent, not
ready to deal with my adult needs. I...failed to take you as my Padawan
until it was almost too late. Forgive me."
A tight cold spot in Obi-Wan's psyche loosened and he released a
long-held pain to the force. "I understand now Qui-Gon."
The two men locked glances.
"I wanted to give you more time, but I must form a training bond with
Anakin and you are knighted now...." Qui-Gon's words trailed off.
"Do you know how long I wanted this? I think some part of me must
always have known about the bond. I wanted to be chosen as your Padawan
forever. It was always that way for me. Knowing that I was bonded
already took me by surprise. I only wanted to pair-bond with you. That
it was reality made me feel cheated and betrayed...unwanted."
"Never, never, my Obi-Wan." Qui-Gon's lips thinned, "I believe it is
time to have another 'discussion' with Master Yoda," he stressed.
"Qui-Gon?" Obi-Wan was hesitant, "There is a wall."
Qui-Gon Jinn gripped his former padawan's hands tightly and dropped all
his shields. "Will you accept a bond with me?"
Hearing the formal request for bonding offered was all the reassurance
Obi-Wan needed. He also opened his mind. Almost as if it had never
been denied, the soul-bond surged to completion--thicker and infinitely
stronger. Qui-Gon's lips on his was just another point of contact
between them. Leaning towards Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan was enfolded in a loving
embrace. //I remember...I remember it all.//
THE END.
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