Disclaimer: The Buffyverse and all its characters belong to Joss Whedon. This story belongs to me, me, me! Each part is named after the song whose lyrics are featured in the ** **. Part Two is by Love Spit Love. This is an indirect sequel (is that possible?) to 'Games were made for two' and set during the time I wrote it, between the episodes "BBB" and "Passion". Strange, but all the stories I write about Angelus also seem to feature the darker of Buffy's personality.
"Did you ever dance with the Devil in the pale moonlight?" Jack Nicholson as The Joker, "Batman" the movie
Part Two: How Soon is Now?
Buffy sat in The Bronze, staring into her drink like a Druid into a scrying pool. She managed to stir herself long enough to say good-bye to Xander and thought about going home herself. But there wasn't any distractions at home, all she could do there was think about Angel. The longer he was gone the worst she missed him, until now, it was almost a physical pain.
She went to school, she trained, and she Slayed-Slaying was the only time she could lose herself in the sheer sense of purpose. But the whole time the pain was there, deep inside, no matter how hard she pushed it away, no matter how hard she tried to ignore it. She sometimes thought that when Angel's soul had been ripped from his body, a piece of her soul had been taken too.
**How can you say, I go about things the wrong way?
I am human and I need to be loved**
Giles, Willow, Xander, even Cordelia and Oz knew that she was hurting and tried to take the pain away. For a little while, it had worked.
She knew that Giles loved her, and Willow and Xander did too, and she had drawn comfort from that. Even as she had drawn comfort from the voice in her heart that told her that Angel was still around somewhere, that the dream that revealed Jenny Calendar as one of the Romany had been his message to her.
But not any more. Nothing mattered but the ache in her soul.
**You go home, and you cry and you want to die**
Buffy hadn't slept through the night for months, but now she didn't sleep for more than a few hours at a time before she found herself awake, reaching for Angel beside her. Buffy was fairly sure that she would be doing this even if she and Angel hadn't made love, but even if their night together was causing her this much more pain, she wouldn't swap the memories of their time together for anything. Anything except having Angel back.
** See I've already waited too long, and all my hope is gone**
Buffy looked at the gyrating figures on the dance floor, and suddenly she hated all of them for being happy or at least for not hurting like she was. Hated all of them with a passion that shocked and scared her.
Buffy jumped from her seat and ran up the stairs, moving swiftly to a window that led onto the roof.
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