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The big game hunter walked into the bar and bragged to everyone
about his skills as a hunter. The man was undoubtedly a good shot and no
one could dispute that. But then he said that they could blindfold him
and
he would recognise any animal's skin from its feel, and if he could
locate
the bullethole he would even tell them what calibre rifle was used to
shoot it. This was a bit too much for the other
customers, and soon a heated argument was going on. Then the hunter
said that he was willing to prove it if they would put up the drinks, and
the bet was on. They blindfolded him carefully and took him to his first
animal skin. After feeling it for a few moments, he announced.
"Springbok". Then he felt for the bullet hole and declared. "And shot
with
a .22 rifle". The others could not believe it (he was right of course)
and
the argument was even hotter than before. When some started to suggest
that he must have peeped, he said that he was prepared to do it again. He
would put up all the drinks they had bought before against them buying
another round for him. So they blindfolded him again, very thoroughly
this
time, and they brought a skin that someone happened to have in the boot
of
his
car. He took a bit longer this time and then said. "Kalahari Lion"
and fingering the bullet hole, said "and the rifle was a .308" and he was
right again. This of course was like throwing fat on the fire, and he had
to prove his skills, over and over again, everytime against a round of
drinks. Finally he staggered home, stoned out of his mind, and went to
sleep. The next morning he got up and saw in
the mirror that he had one hell of a shiner. So he said to his wife.
'Listen I know I was drunk last night, but not too drunk to know that I
did not fight anyone in that bar. So where did I get this black eye?" .
And his wife replied angrily. "From me, of course." "But what did I do?"
he asked. She replied "You got into bed and put
your hand down inside my panties. Then you fiddled around a bit and
announced in a loud triumphant tone: "Skunk, killed with an axe".