Disclaimers: Paramount owns all the Star Trek Universe. I'm just using
those elementsto write this story. I'm not a Ferengi looking for profit.
This story takes place after Voyager returns to the Alpha quadrant.
This is not a typicalTom Paris and B'Elanna Torres story.
Letters From A Far..........
B'Elanna Torres-Kim
Kolare System-Alpha Quadrant
University of Engineering
Tacketh Campus
Dear B'Elanna,
Many times I have tried to write a letter or send a communiqué,
each time I have failed. I did not know how difficult it would be
to put my thoughts into words, struggling to make sense of what I
want to say. A letter might be better than acommuniqué.
The past six years have been crazy to say the least. It
was such a shock to get back home and discover how much things had
changed since we had been gone. Who would have believed that Ferengi
and Cardassians would be in Starfleet? Not me, that is for sure.
Yet things had changed before we ever got back home. Things
between you, me and Harry. I did not handle you and Harry very well.
I was hurt and angry for a long time.I was too blind to see what I
did not want to see. Too blind to see how you began to fall in love
with Harry and fall out of love with me. The only way I could deal
with it was to put distance between us. I'm not sure I made the right
decision, because you two were my friends.
It was a long time ago. I loved you enough to let you go,
yet it broke my heart in two. You showed me what real love was about
and how it should feel.
It is amazing how much things change in ones life, I still
can't believe it myself. My father and I have settled most of our
differences over the years. It was hard to face him again knowing
I was a failure in his eyes. It was something I had to do, a stone
that needed to be cast away. My mother and sisters were there to assure me
that I could do this. Put to rest my demons of the past.
Now dad is looking forward to coming to Marseilles for a
visit. We plan on going camping and checking out a few bistros. I
never realized how much I missed him, until I got home.
These days I'm teaching at the Academy in Paris. Space Flying
101-Flyboy style. It's an advanced course in starship navigation
that teaches one to rely on the moment and not on Starfleet protocols.
It is hard to believe that I have a course named after me. I
feel strange sometimes when I'm talking about getting out of rough spots
because I was thinking of other things.
I get a nostalgic feeling when I pilot now at days. My mind
travels back to Voyager and trying to escape the Kazon or the Vidians.
The adrenaline rush is not like it used to be in the Delta quadrant.
I suppose I have mellowed out in life. Mellowed out to the
point where I got married a couple of years ago and settled down.
I can see that look of "your full of it" on your face. Yes, Thomas Eugene
Paris got married. In a couple of months there will be a little pilot
running around. I had no idea expecting a child could be so wonderful,
nor being married for that matter. Life is more than I ever dreamed.
Three years ago, Lynn Asheton kicked my butt in a game of pool
and kicked it again in Parieses squares. All in one night. She took
pity on me, bought me dinner, and told me what I was doing wrong.
She was so straight forward and to the point. I saw something of
myself in her, and it scared the hell out of me. Over a period of time,
we began spending more time together. We built a one person craft
that traveled along the ocean floor. I never did so much arguing with
anyone like I did with her. You would swear we hated each other, but
we didn't. And then one day, we fell in love, happened faster than
a transport to London.
Lynn often wonders how in the world you and Harry put up with me
for so long. With all of the crazy stuff I did and how much I got you
two in trouble. I still find trouble from time to time, and Lynn is not
as innocent as you think she is. She instigates more trouble than I do!
I'm sure our child will be just as bad as we are.
Over time, I have realized that I am not that bad of a person,
even though I thought that for a long time. Life can only get better
from this point on. It is what was not said in the past that bothers me.
I never told you and Harry how much I loved you both. I never said the
words that needed to be said. I'm truly happy for you and Harry.
Harry has founda treasure in the emptiness of space...you.
Love,
Tom
Tom Paris
Paris, France-Sol System-Earth
Starfleet Academy-Paris Campus
Room 45A Subspace 14
Navigation 101
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Tom sat down under a tree with a bag full of data padds. He
silently reminded himself to never have his students write a essay on
why they want to be a pilot. He would have been better off just asking
them, but never really understanding why they did.
The warm summer day was quiet as he read the first seven essays.
He found himself getting lost in them, seeing what they saw in flying.
He was seeing himself.
Shuffling through the padds, he found a communiqué, from B'Elanna.
For a moment he froze, afraid to read it. He took a deep breath and
began to read it. Soon the words appeared on the padd.
Tom Paris
Paris, France-Sol System-Earth
Starfleet Academy-Paris Campus
Room 45A Subspace 14
Navigation 101
Dearest Tom,
I never realized how beautiful your handwriting was until I received
your letter. Your letters flowed with perfection, something I have not
been able to master after all these years.
I didn't think I would ever hear from you again to be honest. I knew
you were hurt and that no amount of explaining would help you heal. Time
would be the factor that would heal your heart.
You gave me strength to love again, to love Harry. I only wish you
weren't so blind to see what was happening. I never wanted to hurt you,
and I think I did.
Things got crazy after we got home. Starfleet keeping us under tight
wraps, other governments wanting to know what we knew and families waiting
to see if those they loved would be there. It was like being tossed into a
three ring circus and being asked to perform on the high wire with out a
net. I really wanted to go hide and not face that moment. But you asorbed
it all, not showing anyone what you felt. It was like you dreaded being
back home.
Maybe I was being too hard on you. Your life was no better than
mine before we were taken away by the Caretaker. I'm glad you made peace
with your father, my mother died a few years before we got back home. I
have no idea where my father is.
It is not like my life has been boring and meaningless, it has
been the opposite. I never thought my life would be filled with happiness,
I was wrong. I'm not sure how I stumbled into teaching, Harry tells me it
is because I had a lot to teach. Many times I have told him he was full
of plasma also. He would only laugh and go back to whatever schematic he
was working on.
Then I started to talk about how I got Voyager to do the impossible
and it felt natural. Hard to believe I can explain things that happened
too quickly. That is amazing! Well.......I can still slam heads, I haven't
lost my touch, that is for sure!
There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of you. Harry is
always talking about "The Best Damn Pilot" to ever exist. I know he misses
you very much. He was hurt as much as you were. The friendship you shared
was.....shattered. Shattered by us. By being blind to what was going on.
Harry never talked about it when Voyager got home, he clamed up,
when I would mention you name. I know and you know Harry could have talked
to you or seen you, but he didn't. I don't really know why he didn't.
It was a subject that we never brought up too much. Time has changed all
of us. We are not who we were six years ago.
Now there is Andrew Torres-Kim, our son, who was born six months ago.
Born right in the middle of a fire storm. What a way to come into the world!
Harry was running around, trying to be calm and I was vid taping him. It
was funny to see him freaking out, fire storm and my water breaking was
enough to make a calm quiet man to berserk. He was prepared if the labor
was going to be short, but it wasn't. The fire storm lasted for four
hours and my labor was 23 hours. The vid tape is secure for future use.
I'm sure I could find a good use for it.
Harry is a loving father. He is always talking to Andrew and telling
him how important it is to know operations of any plan. He loves to hold
him and just babble to him. I sometimes think Andrew actually understands
him. I've been getting in my engineering talks with him lately. Our
luck he will grow up to be a doctor! Harry wants a house full of children
and I'm sure he will get his way.
You will enjoy being a father, Tom. You have a lot to teach to a
child, except for how to pick up women, if you have a boy. That
information will be written into his genetic codes. You have to have
a child like side to yourself to be a parent. You have that side to
you, or at least I think you still do. Congratulations to you and Lynn!!
At any rate, it has been too long since I have gotten into any
trouble, I miss it. I miss playing pool with you and Harry and beating
the crap out of you two. I miss the practical jokes and the late night
parties. Most of all, I miss us, the three of us.
You have showed me what love should feel like and not to be afraid
to love. I don't think I ever said "Thank You". Someday we will get
together and laugh like we have in the past, I hope.
Love,
B'Elanna.
