> You're a Teacher If...
> 
> You believe the staff room should have a Valium salt lick.
> 
> You find humor is other people's stupidity.
> 
> You want to slap the next person who says, "Must be nice to
> have all you holidays and summers free."
> 
> You can tell it's a full moon without ever looking outside.
> 
> You believe "shallow gene pool" should have it's own box on
> the
> report card.
> 
> You believe that unspeakable evil will befall you if anyone
> says,
> "Boy, the kids are sure mellow today."
> 
> When out in public, you feel the urge to talk to strange
> children and
>   correct their behavior.
> 
> Marking all A's on the report card would make your life SO
> much
> simpler.
> 
> When you mention "vegetables" and you're not talking about a
> food
> group.
> 
>   You think people should be required to get a government
> permit
> before being allowed to reproduce.
> 
> You wonder how some parents ever managed to reproduce.
> 
> You believe in aerial spraying of Prozac.
> 
> You really encourage an obnoxious parent to check into home   
>        schooling.
> 
> You've never had your profession slammed by someone who would
>   never dream of doing your job.
> 
> You can't have children of your own, because there is no name
> you
> could give a child that wouldn't bring on high blood pressure
> the moment you heard it.
> 
> Meeting a child's parents instantly answers the question, "Why
> is
> this kid like this?"