Petitions to Oberon for court

From Balaam's desk, there is no Balaam. Instead Gram pulls out a sheet and starts to read out

"Balaam is indisposed and for once not just drunk."

There are many spontaneous applause and a few whistles.

Flora says,"I hope the poisonous creature choked on his own paperwork."

Gram continues ignoring her,"Petition from Prince Rory to His Majesty."

He reads:

1. Permission for Rory to create the Order of the Cheetah and grant knighthoods within it to his chosen retainers."

Oberon rolls his eyes.

Then he says, "I will recognize it as an Order of the continent of Ardor as a mark of heraldry."

Then Oberon chuckles,"I can see Suhuy and Bances furious that I am not consulting their old Atlantean hasbeens."

"It is not an Order of Amber though. It is recognized as par to Orders of Golden Circle allies. And Rory is the Grand Master of the Order."

"Anyone want to give Rory some meowmix,:" quips Caine.

"Cheetahs rust fast, my father, but are not known for their stamina," Zariya says, stifling a touch of a yawn.

Caine laughs,"So is Rory. He never finishes anything he gets into."

Oberon looks at both of them and shakes his head,"Why do I think I am playing entertainter to Mystery Science Theatre 3000's cast as children and grandchildren?"

"Forgive me, Your Majesty," Zariya replies. "I was simply making an observation."

"Of course I forgive you. You just had to meet your brother. Is he really considering Rory the missing link in the Maxfiles?" laughs Oberon rudely.

With a glance at Caine, Zariya says, "My brother was mistaken about many things. Hopefully, I can clear his misunderstandings." She says it smoothly, of course, but with a faint hint of irritation underneath.

Oberon's green eyes twinkle. "I think we should trick Mulder into stumbling onto some elven gold."

"Whatever you would like to do with my sibling is up to you, Your Majesty," Zariya accedes. "We are but tools in your hands."

Oberon purses his lips as various images cross his mind causing him to smirk.

"Thank you. Trouble is some tools in my hands are bankrupting me."

"It is my hope that I am not one of them," Zariya replies. "If there is anything I can do to ease your burden, I would only be happy to accomplish it."

"If you were I would be attacking your budget - Not enriching it."

Breyd is cramming her fist in her mouth at this point and trying not to snigger too loudly. Some of her cousins are bigger 'tools' in her mind than others. She may have to excuse herself and get a glass of water and a chance to calm down.

Oberon catches this, "It is a pity that the redheaded girls just prefer to be contrary while the redheaded boys can be used to make money... One way or another. They just spend money and act like they know everything."

Fiona glares at her father.

"Oh, but Grand-papa, you haven't seen my present yet...I was simply waiting my turn..." Breyd purrs, wicked mischief in her eyes. "You don't seem content with the bodies I bring you."

"Well..." Oberon says impatiently tapping his foot. "Did you bring me gold? Precious jewels? Negotiables? Suhuy's debt ledger?"

"A bit of all the above," She promises and turns and gestures to a green-clad page. He brings forwards a coffer stuffed with currency and a few deeds of land...One of them in Ardor Near Senator Si's decadent mansion, and one for a ranch in the Golden Circle...

"I'm still working on the art, Grandfather," she drawls lazily. "Was there anything in particular you fancied?"

[Errata: It was two deeds, one was to an estate near Senator Maelstrom's territory in Koronade. The other was a landholding in Haven.]

"you can keep Si's neighbourhood hovel." Oberon sneers,"Or sell it and give me half."

Breyd lowers her head in graceful acknowledgement of Oberon's words.

"As for the rest, let me reward you. You may have the Manor of Desmaurins that is adjacent to your County. You will have to rebuild it from the ground up as Caine burned it and garrotted all the peasants four years ago, carelessly forgetting that we need people to till the soil even if they are secretly worshipping Theobald's heretics." Oberon notes wagging his finger to Caine.

"I have become used to repairing Uncle Caine's leavings," Breyd says quietly, no hint of judgement or opinion in her tone. "I shall endeavour with this as well. Thank you for your kind generousity, Grandfather. I am most grateful." Brey dlowers her eyes with her dulcet humble tones.

Gram reads out:

2. A mutual defense treaty between Hathor and Amber.

Oberon looks to Gram, "I do not see King Ferris' signature on this petition."

"Rory you are not King of Hathor. You are a Minister there. However I will admit Hathor to the Golden Circle when it donates 500,000 Haven Dollars to the Amber Treasury."

"Gram slap a 100,000 Thelbane Pound levy on all Golden Circle Countries. 200,000 to those who paid Rolandae to leave them alone." Oberon adds,"We need the cash. Laszlo overspent on the roads and canals."

"Your Majesty, if I may.." Zariya says, frowning slightly. "By all accounts, under Prince Rory's excellent business skills and King Ferris' leadership, Hathor is doing well, and will likely do very well monetarily in the coming years.

Oberon listens to her,"Can they give me more money?"

"And one can never be certain on loyalties. After all, Ferris is a new King, and we have yet to see where his policies will take Hathor. Might not an additional trial period be wise to set? Say...ten percent or so of Hathor's incomes, either after or before their expenses, over a period of ten years as tribute, as we accustom ourselves to Hathor and Hathor to us? As we see how loyal they will be to Amber, the tribute could be scaled down over the years so that they are not burdened unfairly by the tribute." She stops, then adds bowing her head humbly, "Merely a suggestion, Your Majesty."

"Good idea but make it eleven percent." Oberon says.

3. Royal naval protection for Rory's trade convoys, as they are flying the Amber flag, and the taxes on the revenues they raise goes to support the navey and the rest of the government.

Oberon looks at Rory,"The whole object of your ships is to not carry my flag so you can not pay flag fees however I am instructing Jada to increase harbour and flag fees."

"I will grant you permission to use my flag and call for assistance once fees are paid." Oberon says pleasantly.

4. The issuance of letters of marque on all ships trading with tantaruk, as Tantaruk has:

-Retained as its chief advisor one of the chief members of the Court of Ardor

"Valmorgul is such an old hack. He should work for Haven the way he clings to that job." Oberon comments.

-Declared a member of the Amber royal family outlaw

"Cheeky." Oberon says,"What cheek. Rory should go and box their ears."

-Declared itself a Swayvillistic state and has courted and received aid and assistance from Amber's enemies, including and especially the Great Powers adhering to the Finndo Doctrine.

"And the moon is made of green cheese and Kelric is giving up slurpees." Oberon says with great contempt. "The Finndo Doctrine is as valid as the Donation of Constantine."

-Received aid from the aforementioned states under the cover of trade.

"Good. I want the cash." Oberon says running a hand through his own red hair.

We request that an embargo placed upon Tantaruk and that all and any ships violating that embargo be subject to search, seizure, and destruction by those bearing letters of marque.

Oberon listens to this,"Granted. I thought you were pirating them already."

Then he adds,"Try to not destroy them. Try to sell them for cash."

"Your majesty, if I go pirating, my trade convoys start going to the bottom of the ocean," Rory says. He shrugs. "With the money I have going to fund my less industrious and less frugal cousins, the costs it would take to get royal naval protection to free the ships to hit Tanturaki commerce...I suppose I could always go bankrupt. Bye-bye GKTC and its subsidiaries, your Majesty, and bye-bye to the revenue it brings. You said it yourself - I'm stretched thin." He shrugs again. "It's a matter of time before something breaks. I guess I'll start pricing out student apartments in Haven."

"If we don't get money fairly soon," Oberon says,"We will be all renting those campus facilities out from Suhuy in Haven City."

"Do you really want to be living in Haven Rory? You were there once." Oberon slyly reminds him.

"Not particularly, your majesty. They have an overabundance of rules there," Rory says. "You spoke of needing money. Money I give to my cousins and allow them to waste is not money that is invested in making you more money. Perhaps they should demonstrate that they can reaise their own capital before being entrusted with the kingdom's."

"Then you as alderman should do your job to ensure due probity," Oberon cuts him off.

"I was actually referring to Zariya, your Majesty. dunstee and Alexis at least know what a budget is," Rory murmurs.

"Your Majesty," Zariya says, giving Oberon a low curtsey, "If I may point out to my cousin that the only expenses I have incurred the Crown and not paid for out of my own pocket are those expenses that as ambassador I require. This would include a single gift to Garnath, and my households in Neuvo Sangre and Garnath. I might add," she says glancing at Rory briefly, "that my households there are only partially on the Crown's payroll, and that I have been paying half their wages personally."

"Well done!" Oberon says,:"What an example for every one of your cousins."

"And all of my people are self-funded," Rory says, "As are my visits to the places I'm still ambassador to."

Later, Oberon's Court receives a message:

"Dear old farts,

"Since unlike Oberon I have funds and manners, I'll be delighted to cover Zariya's costs and expenses whenever she's in town.

"Jason, mad sorceror-king, etcetera."

Rack up the expenses since Jason was born super rich and is a redheaded grandson of Suhuy. He's made of money.

Gram

"Your Majesty, there is a high amount of shipping that passes through the Horns of Hathor, and we control the Horns," Rory says. "In fact, there are states that are dependednt upon trade coming through them. Why don't we place a tax on every ship passing through the horns? Charge by tonnage of ship, and another charge for tonnage of cargo on top of that."

Oberon thinks,"The only one besides you and Rolandae would be Pearl, Laszlo and Koronande."

"Sure but you pay too." Oberon says,"However I know Rolandae will enforce it and they will let you through anyways for free. Tell that fat yellow cat to not keep all the money for himself or I will come to Garnath and kick him under his fat tail."

"Look out for Laszlo, Rory." Oberon tells him.

"You could also open the Paolo line outwards. Haven might subsidize their lumber, but they have to pay workers and re-seed forests. I don't. I think I can undercut their hardwood and softwood lumber prices and still make a healthy, taxable profit. I can probably undercut Trinity steel, too, while I'm at it - taxable profits."

"The Paolo line is becoming porous enough." Oberon says,"Not now. And I am sick of getting HBC bitching about hardwood and softwood lumber all damned day like it is something I give a damn about. Go to Haven and spread some roundup through their forests and see how they like it."

This text is copyright © the players and GM of Equinox; "Amber" is copyright © Roger Zelazny; "Amber" the diceless RPG is copyright © Phage Press. No copyright infringement is intended.

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