In Memory of Hesh

 

MC Chris is no longer working on Sealab 2021. His character, Hesh, was written off the show. In the episode, "The Legend of Baggy Pants," which aired November 24, 2002, Hesh was horribly mutated while retrieving a golf ball from Sealab's reactor core for Capt. Murphy. He was forced to leave Sealab. Having shed a tear at his own "funeral" (a la "The Incredible Hulk"), Hesh is now a man on the run, searching for a cure. So here is my memorial to Hesh, without whom, I may have never discovered MC Chris.

 

R.I.P. Hesh

MC Chris (Chris Ward) as Hesh on Sealab 2021

 

 

My favorite Hesh lines:

I want to be a henchman too! Hesh wants metal teeth! Hesh will bite anything. He'll bite that. He'll bite this. (Marco: Don't bite the main circuit, Hesh) AAAAAAAHHH!!!! AAAAAH! AAAAH! AAAAH! Oh my God! It hurts bad! (Happy Cake)

Hey, I've got a few conditions on this robot thing. I'll only put my brain in a robot body if I can put it in a robot cat. (I, Robot)

Have fun on the robot reservation suckers! We're not going to honor those bogus treaties! Hesh will see you in he-- (I, Robot)

Hey! Hesh wants some sex! (Stormy: Hesh, get off! My tape's playing.) Shut up! Debbie, get down here! Give Hesh some sex! (Stormy: Hesh, this isn't funny.) Be real funny when I crack you with a PIPE! (Stormy: Okay, I'm coming down there) SHUT UP! (Debbie: Well now, Hesh--) SHUT UP! (Debbie: Um, okay. Why do you think you would make a good father?) Umm...give me a second...uhhh...SEX! (Chickmate)

(Dressed as a geisha) Why don't you come on down? I'll give you a body shampoo. (Feng Sheui)

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