Attack! Inside the Temple of Nightmares!

            Ueiko and Rofellos had just exited the temple; after a misunderstanding with the door, they joined the others around back. “That went well,” Ueiko commented.

            “Well, what did you find out?” Ara asked.

            “Nothing,” Ueiko replied. “Now can I blow it up?”

            “No!”

            Rofellos smirked as Ueiko exclaimed, “Man, you’re no fun!”

            “And you’re a destruction freak,” Ara retorted.

            “And your point is…?”

            “You’re almost worst than that freak of a princess.”

            “She doesn’t destroy things.”

            Realizing that their argument might go on for a while, Rofellos turned to Leigh and quietly asked, “Hey, how are you doing?”

            “The point is that you’re both freaks,” Ara mumbled in reply.

            Ueiko, who caught her comment, bade his time while the other two men continued their conversation. “I’m alright, I suppose,” Leigh replied.

            “Nice weather, isn’t it?” Rofellos asked.

            Ueiko smiled and turned to Ara. Raising his eyebrows suggestively, he asked, “In that case, what are you doing later?”

            She face-faulted, falling to the ground violently. “What?!” she asked when she recovered.

            “Nothing,” he mumbled in reply.

            “Well, stop it,” she grumbled at him.

            Oblivious to the comedic scene behind him, or perhaps ignoring it, Leigh continued his conversation with Rofellos. “Yup, not too hot, not too cold,” he agreed. “Just right.”

            “You-”

Ara cut Rofellos off. In irritation, she turned to the other men and barked, “And you stop that too. What are we going to do about Zoragath?”

“Kill him,” Ueiko replied simply, as if that answered everything (and in his mind, it did).

“What did we do?” Rofellos asked with wounded pride. It was bad enough being short, but being yelled at by a woman as tall as he was only made it worse.

Ara mumbled a reply. “It’s what you’re not doing…” Rofellos ignored her.

“Zoragath’s a Mazoku, right?” Leigh asked, trying to be constructive.

“Yes,” Ara replied.

“You are the one that won’t let me get him out of there so don’t complain,” Ueiko rebuked the priestess.

Ara sighed a long-suffering sigh. “Fine. Just don’t destroy the temple. Kill all the guards for all I care. I just don’t want to see the stupid Justice Princess bring her little army here or something,” she ranted, nearly growling.

“I am sure we could handle her,” Rofellos said as he rolled his eyes.

“Why would she do that?” Ueiko asked. “They don’t even like the temple!”

“Because she's a justice freak. How do I know?” she snapped.

“That convinced me. Let’s wait,” Ueiko mumbled sardonically.

Missing the sarcasm, Ara face-faulted and replied, “What?” Ueiko raised his eyebrows in surprise.

Leigh had a suggestion which he stated with exaggerated patience. “Why don’t we all just hit the shrine with,” Leigh said and managed to snap his fingers sarcastically, “astral attacks? It shouldn’t do any physical damage to the temple.”

“Works for me,” Rofellos conceded.

“Where’s the fun?” Ueiko demanded.

“That’s a great idea!” Ara congratulated enthusiastically. Finally, we’re getting somewhere, she thought.

Bowing, Leigh replied, “Thank you.” He explained. “I don’t want to deal with the Princess any more than,” he pointed at Ara, “she does.”

Ueiko, who had paused as if listening to someone, challenged Leigh. “No, it’s nearly not destructive enough…”

Ara mumbled something derogatory about either the Princess or Ueiko, but no one caught what she said; Ueiko smiled evilly in response. Then she added, “That princess is a freak…”

Continuing on his line of thought, Leigh announced, “Unfortunately, all I know is Elmekia Lance.”

“Me, too,” Rofellos said. Ara shook her head; she didn’t know any astral attack spells.

Instead of answering, Ueiko winked suggestively at Rofellos. In response, Leigh’s eye twitched in the typical anime “What the hell?” expression and he muttered something about his company. Then Ueiko said, “Fine. Ra Tilt the crap out of it for all I care.” He smiled and raised his eyebrows suggestively at Ara.

Both Rofellos and Ara were thrown for a loop. “Are you flirting with me?” Ara asked confusedly.

“No, just playing,” Ueiko replied and laughed. Then he demanded, “Can we kill stuff now? So when do we attack?”

“How about now?” Rofellos suggested.

Ueiko slipped in a little comment. “Priests are fun to play with…”

“Don’t look at me! I don’t know any astral attacks!” Ara reminded them. Then she turned to Ueiko and glared. “And leave them alone!”

“We can burst in the door dramatically and shoot everyone in there,” Rofellos suggested enthusiastically.

“With what? Your toenails?” Ueiko replied quietly. He hung his head; it would be another hour by the time they attacked anything.

Then the air was alive with ideas. “Anyone else know Mono Volt?”

“Ra Tilt anyone?”

Leigh offered, “I know Elmekia Lance, but I’m not very good at it…”

“I got Elmekia Lance,” Rofellos replied.

“Er…” Ara sweatdropped; she really wasn’t going to be any help in this battle.

“Sad,” Ueiko spat.

“I know,” Leigh agreed and shook his head.

“When does the wall fall?” Ueiko asked impatiently.

“I agree. Knock down the door, and then hit them with astral attacks!” Leigh suggested. “The one that responds is the one we should then focus on.”

“Please, don’t destroy the temple!” Ara chided. “Well, at least not as much as the Enemy of All Who Live,” she amended quietly, thinking again of Lina Inverse.

Rofellos smiled evilly as he thought of something. “Any one else know Scatter-Bleed?”

“Yes, why don’t we club the priests with sponges while we’re at it?” Ueiko commented derisively and rolled his eyes.

“I do,” Leigh offered in response to Rofellos, “but Scatter-Bleed doesn’t do much in the first place.”

“Exactly.”

“Get your sponges then! To battle!”

Ara ignored him. “Why can’t we use Scatter-Bleed?”

“Astral attacks don’t work very well on people,” Ueiko stated. It might have been in response to Ara or a complaint.

“You got any spells that knock people out?” Rofellos asked Leigh.

“I can cast Sleeping, but I don’t know if I could knock everyone out,” Ara offered quietly, but she was eclipsed by Ueiko.

“I can burn them down!” he declared enthusiastically.

Rofellos, still ignoring his other companions, said, “I can use Mono Volt. Anyone else?”

Leigh nodded in confirmation. “Mono Volt.”

Ara sighed and rolled her eyes. “It’s a stone temple, for crying out loud!” She was beginning to wish she had found the Dragon Spooker and asked her for help.

“I can Necro Vuud the priests and have some fun,” Ueiko suggested. He knew the others were ignoring him, but he was waiting to sneak off and destroy the temple until they were too involved with each other.

Unfortunately, Ara was still paying attention to him. “No!” she shouted.

“The people, not the temple,” he replied as if it made a difference.

She smacked the back of his head with her staff. “Will you leave the priests alone?!!”

“But what if they try to stop us?” Ueiko asked, trying to justify his violent suggestions of violence.

“Then I think we agree knock them out with spells,” Rofellos replied.

Ara sighed. “Why do we have to run in there like we’re attacking the place? I may not be able to go in there, but why can’t you just walk in?”

Still thinking about possible spells, Leigh suggested, “Dill Brand?”

“No, no, we don’t have to run in,” Rofellos refuted. “Just kick the door in dramatically!”

“I do not have disabling spells and my sword isn’t very dull,” Ueiko replied “sadly”; Ara sighed.

“Dill Brand!” Leigh said again.

“Dill Thud,” Ueiko commented derisively.

Leigh ignored him, as most of the party had begun to do. “It would throw them into the ceiling and knock them out.” He paused. “Nah.”

“Bomb di Wind,” Rofellos suggested; the spell had nearly the same end effect.

“Fine,” Ueiko said. “I am going in. We will figure it out.” He quietly left.

Ara gave Leigh the look. “What does Dill Brand do? Destroy stones. What is the temple made out of? Stones!” she shouted in a “you’re stupid” voice.

Leigh blinked in confusion, paused, and then sweatdropped. “Oops…”

“Wait,” Rofellos said. “We can use Dill Brand to make a back way in.”

“Let’s just go in,” Leigh suggested. “They don’t know us. We ask to see what’s-his-face, and then Elmekia Lance him!”

Then Ara, noticing Ueiko had disappeared, assumed the worst and stormed angrily to the front entrance of the temple. The others noticed his absence as well and quickly followed Ara. Unfortunately, she got there just as Ueiko burst through the doors. Not wishing to be seen, she cursed and hastily hid with her back against the wall.

“We have a question: where is the head priest at this moment?” Ueiko said as he entered. He smiled contentedly as he waited for an answer as he knew he had won with his party, most of whom joined him a moment later. There were now only two priests in the foyer and the two guards. One priest looked at the other and then at the guards, obviously wondering who the party was. Leigh waved pleasantly at the priests trying to score brownie points. “Well?” Ueiko added impatiently.

“He’s downstairs in the vault...but you can’t go down there,” one of the priests answered.

“That does not answer the question. Why not?”

“Because it’s sacred,” the other priest replied. Then he recognized Ueiko and Rofellos. “Hey, weren’t you here earlier?”

“Yes,” Ueiko replied impatiently.

“Who are you? What is your business?” one of the guards asked, equally impatient.

“Quick question!” Leigh exclaimed. “When would be the easiest time to see him? I have a really important question.”

The priests looked at each other uncertainly. “Well,” the first priest replied, “he really doesn’t like visitors…”

“We really need to see him,” Rofellos insisted.

The second priest hesitated. “But you...” Then he had an idea. “Hey, let me go ask Horus!” He quickly exited, leaving the other priest alone; the other priest smiled nervously.

Ueiko leaned over to Leigh and whispered, “Where is your bathroom?”

“Hmm?”

“Was that your important question?”

“Oh. Not that,” he replied just as the priest returned.

“Follow me. Horus says you can ask him,” the priest said.

“Ah, goody!” Leigh exclaimed in delight.

“Who is he?” Ueiko asked as he and the others followed. Ara, who had heard the entire conversation, cursed because she couldn’t follow them.

“He’s sort of the guy under the High Priest,” the priest replied as he led them up a beautifully carved staircase; the material it was carved from, as well as the staircase itself, resembled the interior of a conch shell.

“Ah,” Ueiko replied. Leigh whistled in appreciation as they passed beautiful statues and other figures in the conch shell wall. The priest solemnly led them up a few flights of stairs, through a delicate archway, and down another flight of stairs into a large chamber. Its floor was a mosaic of Ceiphied and Shabranigdo’s ancient battle. The opposing wall was adorned with a grand carving of the Lord of Nightmares’ symbol.

The far wall was filled by a long table at which several priests sat; they were discussing something in another language. Most of the priests were dressed in white robes, but each robe was trimmed in a different color. The only exception was Horus, who sat in the middle of the table; he was wearing the same elaborate grey robes.

Ueiko winked at a young priestess on the end of the table. She blushed in embarrassment, but smiled back; he grinned at her. Meanwhile, Leigh and Rofellos smiled politely at the rest of the priests. “May we have a moment of your time?” Ueiko asked just as their guide reached the middle of the table.

The priest quickly bowed. “This is…er…” He smiled nervously as he realized he hadn’t even asked their guests their names. Ueiko lightly bowed, too.

Horus looked up from his parchment. “Yes?”

“Here or elsewhere?” Ueiko asked, jumping the gun.

“Rofellos,” he introduced himself at the same time. He stepped forward and bowed as well.

“Elsewhere,” Ueiko suggested rudely.

Horus looked at them in confusion for a moment. “Yes, elsewhere,” he agreed as he stood.

“Lead the way.” Ueiko gestured.

“Excuse me,” Horus said to the other priests. “Sera, please take care of this.” Then Horus walked behind the carving and pressed the wall; a door appeared.

The men followed, but Leigh waved at the priests again before leaving. Except for the priestess on the end, the priests had all gone back to their business; the priestess winked at him. Ueiko smacked Leigh in the stomach just before they left the chamber.

The room beyond the door was a small study filled with books. On the far side was a desk, and behind the desk was a small table with refreshments on it. “Coffee?” Horus asked.

“No, thanks,” Rofellos replied.

“No, thank you.” Ueiko bowed again.

Leigh nodded. Horus poured two cups, handed one to Leigh, and sat down. “You don’t really have to bow,” he told them nonchalantly and sipped his coffee.

“I am aware of that,” Ueiko replied in a tone that could be taken many ways.

Horus raised an eyebrow before asking, “Who are you?”

“Rofellos, sir,” he replied.

“I am Ueiko Crovaar, at your service.”

“I’m Leigh,” he introduced and smiled. “Coffee!”

“…”

“We are here to inquire upon the head priest and were wondering when we could see him,” Ueiko said.

Horus smiled. “I am Horus, the Head Priest.”

“You have sugar?” Leigh asked.

“Over there,” he replied and pointed. Leigh walked over to the table, grabbed some sugar, and tossed a cube into his mouth.

“We were told the head priest was Zoragath,” Ueiko stated guardedly.

“You wish to speak to Zoragath?” Horus replied inquiringly. “May I ask why?”

Leigh looked around the room inquisitively as he replied, “I have a question for him and a message. Only for him, though.” He sat down next to the others.

“Is he the head priest or were we misinformed?” Ueiko asked impatiently.

Horus laughed. “No, he is the High Priest. I’m his second in command, so to speak.”

Ueiko looked confused, so Rofellos leaned over and whispered to him. “He is the Head Priest. Zoragath is the High Priest.”

Not hearing them, Horus continued. “I’m sorry, but you really can’t see him. He’s quite busy.” He sipped his coffee. “And in any case, he's been in a dreadful mood since last night.”

“When can we see him?” Ueiko asked impatiently.

“I’m sure he will want to hear this,” Rofellos added helpfully.

“What’s wrong?” Leigh asked. “It’s the celibate thing, isn’t it? It would make me foul, too.” He smiled dumbly.

Ueiko gave him a look that meant death if he didn’t shut up right then; Leigh blinked in surprise. Horus looked at Leigh like he was an idiot and confusedly exclaimed, “What?”

“Please don’t mind him; he is only a messenger,” Rofellos said quickly.

“He is a fool, sir. Please disregard him,” Ueiko added just as quickly. Leigh looked around the room blankly and sipped more of his coffee; Ueiko just shook his head.

Horus coughed, choosing to ignore Leigh, and continued. “Zoragath has locked himself in the vault and hasn't come out since. He’s been quite upset over the robbery.”

“What robbery?” Rofellos asked in alarm.

A look of disgust came over Horus’ face as he replied. “Last night, one of our priestesses took a very sacred relic from the vault.”

“Oh!” Leigh yelped, remembering what Ara had told them, but he quickly shut up. “What’s the relic?”

Pondering, Rofellos commented, “I wonder why…”

“Unfortunately, I don’t know what it is,” Horus replied. “It’s something only the High Priest knows. I was unaware we even had it until this morning.” He shrugged.

“Must be important,” Leigh said.

“And the priestess?” Ueiko asked curiously; he wondered how much truth Ara had told them.

“She’s gone, I’m afraid. I don't know where she would have gone. It’s a shame, too.”

“Why is that?”

“I was thinking about promoting her. She was a very good healer,” Horus replied. “Very talented, though she didn’t seem to grasp white magic very well.”

“Then how could she heal well?” Ueiko asked.

“She was very talented in healing with herbs.”

“Oh.”

Horus sighed. “And she was very devoted…”

“Evidence to the contrary,” Ueiko replied. “I’ve very sorry, sir.” He paused thoughtfully before adding, “When will the head priest be available? I am afraid this is most urgent.”

Unfortunately, Leigh’s question overshadowed Ueiko’s. “Any idea what the relic looked like?”

“I don’t know what it looked like, but it must have been quite small,” Horus replied, pondering on it himself. It troubled him that he hadn’t even known.

“Maybe we could look?” Leigh paused. “Oh, the message!” He searched for it in his pockets.

“You idiot; they don’t have it anymore!” Rofellos hissed.

“Look for it!” Leigh replied and smiled; his smile could have been considered empty-headed or subtly scheming. Rofellos smacked him for being an idiot; he poked Rofellos in the stomach as a rejoinder.

Returning to the present to find the two men fighting, Horus raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Stop it,” Ueiko warned intensely but quietly.

Leigh managed to find the “message” before Rofellos could retaliate and held it out. “So, you don’t know when I could get this to him?” he asked Horus.

Horus sighed again patiently. “I could try asking him. Are you sure that you can’t give this message to me?”

“Very. It says, ‘For Head Priest’s Eyes Only,’” Leigh replied confidently.

“What?” Ueiko asked in confusion. Where had he gotten a message?

“High, you idiot!” Rofellos corrected Leigh in irritation.

Leigh looked at the imaginary message’s envelope. “High. Excuse me.”

“No, excuse me,” Horus replied. “I’ll go see if he’ll talk to you. I’ll be right back.” Then he disappeared in a flash of light, causing Ueiko to raise his eyebrows in surprise and suspicion.

A moment later, Horus returned, and he looked a bit unsettled. “I’m sorry, but you cannot see the High Priest today,” he told them politely but almost in one word. “I’m sorry for your time.”

“Why is that?” Rofellos asked politely.

“Then when?” Ueiko demanded.

“Ah. Ummm,” Leigh began, but Ueiko shot him a warning look. “Can we schedule an appointment with him maybe?”

“I don’t know when. In the mean time, feel free to walk around our temple. I must be going. Excuse me,” Horus replied hurriedly.

“Thank you, sir,” Ueiko replied. “We will do just that.”

Horus nodded in reply and then rushed out the door. He leaned over to whisper something in Sera’s ear. In response, she stood up and briskly, but not hastily, walked out the door as Horus sat back down and continued the meeting.

Having seen the display, Leigh looked around uneasily and whispered to his companions. “I think we should make an exit…”

Rofellos whispered a reply. “Maybe they know where Ara is. Let’s go check on her.”

They exited Horus’ study. Ueiko winked at the flirty priestess again and smiled. “Fine,” he replied quietly.

The priest that had been their guide previously walked over to them. “Can you find your way out?” he asked helpfully.

“Umm, sure. Thanks!” Leigh replied nervously. The priest nodded in acknowledgement and left.

Meanwhile, Ueiko was making well with the priestess. He raised his eyebrows suggestively at her; she winked back at him a few times and giggled coquettishly. Then she was yelled at by another priest; the party assumed that it was to “Pay attention,” but since they were still speaking in their strange language, they couldn’t be sure. “Later,” Ueiko mouthed to her and then left the room. The other two followed, though Rofellos wanted to further explore the temple.

As he passed the mural by the temple’s outside door, Leigh noticed the strange symbol that he had seen on Ara’s staff. “Hmm…” he pondered.

“How did it go?” Ara asked when they exited. She left her hiding place and followed the others to the back of the temple.

“I think we should stay away from the temple for a while,” Leigh suggested in a cautioning tone. “Odd feeling.”

A look of worry crossed Ara’s face. “Why?”

“Can’t say they were too busy choking on their own blood,” Ueiko remarked.

Leigh talked loud enough to be heard over Ueiko, purposely drowning out his idiotic statement. “Horus whispered something to a priest when we left. The priest jumped up and ran out of the room,” he explained.

“That too,” Ueiko conceded.

“It could have been anything,” Rofellos contested, but he knew Leigh was probably right.

“Still, better safe than sorry,” Leigh replied.

Putting the more important question on hold for a moment, Ara exclaimed, “What are you talking about, Ueiko?”

“Fine, then. I was kidding,” he mumbled in reply.

Ara turned back to her less eccentric companions. “And that could mean anything,” she replied. “Which priest?”

“Umm…” Leigh thought, and then offered, “The one in white?”

“…”

Ara face-faulted; Ueiko ignored him. “Shara or something,” he replied. Then he took a swipe at Leigh’s head to smite him for his stupidity, only to narrowly miss him.

“Sera?” Ara asked unsurely. “Oh…dammit.”

“Is that not good?” Ueiko asked slowly, hoping the answer wasn’t as bad as it sounded.

“Well,” Ara started. “Sera is one of the five priests directly under Horus. It could have meant anything, but it was probably important.”

Noticing the time was almost noon, Leigh pulled out an apple that he had taken from the tavern. “Anyone else up for lunch?” He took a bite of the apple, and then asked, “How important?”

“Depends,” Ara replied. “What happened before then?”

“Well, Horus was gasping for air,” Ueiko supplied.

“He went to see the Mazoku guy. Then he came back and said he – being the Mazoku – was too busy,” Leigh elaborated.

“Well, where was he?” she asked, meaning Zoragath.

“In the vault,” Rofellos replied.

“Something about a relic. Any idea what that’s about?” Leigh asked carefully.

“What is the damn relic?” Ueiko demanded and shredded any tact Leigh had tried to use.

Ara became nervous. “It’s...uh, well, was...uh…hehe...”

“Well?” Rofellos commanded.

“Was?” Ueiko asked.

Leigh blinked. “Wait, what do you mean ‘was’? Uh oh…”

“Good question,” Ueiko grumbled. “Not that I asked it or anything…”

Ara sweatdropped in reply. “Funny story that…”

“They aren’t too happy about a missing relic,” Leigh told her.

“And?” Ueiko demanded. He turned to the others. “Funny…Ringing any bells here?”

“Um...I kind of broke it...” The men collectively sweatdropped.

“Broke it?” Leigh asked, eye twitching.

“Well, what was it?” Rofellos demanded. Ara mumbled a reply. “Spit it out!” he roared at her (which was funny because they’re both the same height. Two “short” – well, short in comparison to the other two - people yelling at each other. Anyway…).

“But it wasn’t my fault!” Ara shouted in reply.

“Horus hadn’t known about it until this morning,” Leigh mused. “At least that’s what he said. How could Horus not know about it, but you did?”

“And?” Ueiko said at the same time. “What happened to it?”

“Cause she stole it!” Rofellos yelled at Leigh, tacking on “stupid” with his tone.

“Will you all stop talking at once!” Ara screamed. Then she sat down and calmly corrected Rofellos. “I didn’t steal it.”

“Fine, just answer,” Ueiko replied and grinned. Rofellos calmed down as he and Ara both took deep breaths.

Leigh sat down as well and took a large, and rather loud, bite of his apple. Ueiko glared at him in annoyance and simply stated, “You are eating.”

Leigh nodded. “Can we discuss this on the way to lunch?” He pointed at the overhead sun to emphasize his point.

“No. Now shut up,” Rofellos snapped.

“Wow, I’m so glad you’re so curious as to what I broke,” Ara interjected sarcastically.

“Now tell us,” Rofellos demanded.

“Answer already,” Ueiko added, further stressing the point.

“It’s only an apple,” Leigh muttered in a hurt voice.

“I’m not in the mood,” Ueiko hissed warningly.

“It was a Claire Bible manuscript,” Ara replied solemnly. “The stupid thing must have been wet or something because it slipped right out of my hands. The stupid ancient thing just broke!”

They were shocked. “Claire Bible?” Leigh asked.

“How do you break paper?” Ueiko asked in confusion.

“It was a tablet with ancient runes,” Ara explained.

“And being wet means what?”

“It was slippery,” Rofellos replied, again adding on “stupid” with his voice.

“Slippery is not good,” Ueiko commented.

“Wait,” Leigh said. “You had a CBM here?”

“Why would a stone tablets get slippery when wet unless it was covered in moss or something?” Ueiko asked.

His comment threw Ara for a loop and she completely forgot about Leigh for a moment. “What?”

“She said it was slippery, not wet,” Rofellos corrected him.

“Just wondering?” Ueiko said, making it sound more like a question.

Ara shook her head, and then replied to Leigh. “And yes, we did.”

“Wow, that’s neat!” Leigh replied.

Ara face-faulted. “‘That’s neat’?!!” she shouted when she recovered. The Claire Bible had knowledge about everything in the universe, and her temple had been lucky enough to have a manuscript, and all Leigh could say was “neat”?!!

“…” was Rofellos’ much simpler reply.

“Why won’t Aya answer Ueiko?” Ueiko whined.

“My name is Ara and what did you ask? It didn’t make sense!”

“Stone, wet, slippery, how? Ring any bells?” Ueiko asked impatiently.

“It was wet, thus slippery, and then whoops, crunch,” Leigh remarked dryly. “No more CBM.”

“How should I know?” Ara demanded. “It was in a freakin’ vault! Those things are always dank and stuff!”

“Mossy or something?” Leigh supplied. Then he sighed and patiently took a drink.

“Did you get a chance to see if it was part of the real Claire Bible?” Rofellos asked hopefully.

Ara blinked in confusion. “Claire Bible manuscript,” she replied with mocking patience. She shrugged. “No one knows where the real one is…” Ueiko face-faulted, to which she replied, “What?” and shrugged.

“Okay then, as you wish,” Ueiko mumbled in reply.

“Leigh’s right. How about some lunch?” Ara suddenly suggested and Leigh cheered.

“Sounds good to me,” Ueiko replied.

Rofellos hung his head in defeat. “Okay…”

“Is there somewhere other than the tavern?” Leigh asked hopefully.

Ara paused thoughtfully. “There are several taverns. What kind of food do you want?”

“The edible kind,” Ueiko quipped.

“Dragon cuisine,” Leigh replied with a large grin.

“…”

“I don’t want that!” Ueiko declared.

“I’m afraid we don’t have that...” Ara replied unsurely.

“Crap,” Leigh said.

“Do you even have that much on you?” she asked suspiciously.

Leigh grinned again. “You’d be surprised. Sushi, then? Is there a lake near by?”

“No.”

“Crud.”

“Why?” Ueiko asked.

“No sea cucumbers then,” Leigh replied simply with a shrug.

Ara sighed. “Just follow me for crying out loud,” she growled. The men followed her down the main road and into an unmarked tavern.

“Can I hit him?” Ueiko asked as he gave Ara a pleading look.

“I don’t care,” she replied indifferently. She sat in a booth and grabbed a menu.

“Oooh, aaah, wow,” Ueiko mumbled without enthusiasm as he took a swipe at Leigh.

Suddenly, a very large trout was pulled from nowhere, and Leigh used it like a sword to block Ueiko’s arm. “Aha!” he exclaimed and smacked Ueiko with the fish.

Ara blinked as the others just stood in shock. “What the…?” she muttered, voicing everyone else’s thoughts.

The fish disappeared and Leigh sat down. “Hmmm?” he asked as if nothing had happened and looked over his menu with interest. Confusedly, the other men joined him.

“What’s on the menu?” Ueiko asked.

A neatly-dressed waiter came over to them. “Can I take your order?” he asked.

“Gimme an ale. A few more minutes on main course,” Leigh told the man.

“What kinds of wine do you have?” Rofellos asked.

“Okay,” the man said to Leigh and then turned to Rofellos. “We have red, white, and just for today, a dragon wine, but it’s very expensive.”

Mischievously, Ueiko leaned over and rubbed Ara’s elbow to see what kind of reaction he would get. Calmly, she reached into the subspace from which Leigh might have gotten his fish. She retrieved her hammer and sharply smacked Ueiko; he fell to the floor dazed. All this happened without her so much as looking up from her menu.

Leigh, having a wife of his own and knowing females’ tempers, ignored the violent display. “Salmon Usuzukuri for me,” he told the waiter.

Ara smiled innocently. “Just water for me, please.”

Ueiko shook his head to clear it; as per anime law, the pervert was fine within moments of her attack, and he sat back in his chair. “Fried rice and sesame seed chicken, please,” he ordered. He flashed a pleased grin at Ara, who turned away in irritation.

The waiter, also knowing better, just turned to Rofellos and asked, “Sir?”

“Just some red wine then,” Rofellos replied.

“And to eat?”

“I’m sorry, Ara,” Ueiko apologized while Rofellos thought.

She nearly face-faulted in surprise. “You’re apologizing?!!”

“About the rubbing, yes.” Ara raised an eyebrow but said nothing.

“I’ll have what he’s having,” Rofellos said to the waiter as he pointed at Leigh.

“Will that be all?” the waiter asked.

“For me, yes,” Ueiko replied.

“That will be all,” Rofellos agreed and handed the waiter his menu.

“Okay. It’ll be a few minutes,” the waiter told them as he collected their menus, and then left.

“Umm…oh, drat,” Leigh exclaimed. Then he muttered, “I’ll ask him when he comes back…”

While the others had been distracted by the waiter, Ueiko had taken the time to discreetly study Ara; he still didn’t trust her for some reason. She caught him and stared back. “What?” she demanded.

Ueiko shrugged in reply, trying to pass off his scrutiny as nothing more than spacing off. Hoping to take her attention off him, he quickly turned to Leigh and asked, “What?”

“Sauce on the Usuzukuri,” Leigh replied and shrugged, oblivious to the fact that he had been just used as a diversion.

At the same time, Rofellos asked, “You aren’t going to eat, Ara?”

“No, not right now,” she replied softly and turned away.

“I can share if you want,” Leigh offered. “Everyone always steals a bite of my Usuzukuri; I’m used to it.”

Ara smiled, trying to hide her embarrassment. “Thanks. Actually, I kinda don’t have any money...”

“You could have just asked,” Rofellos reassured her.

“Yeah,” Leigh agreed, smiling charismatically.

“I have money. Get what you want,” Ueiko declared as charitably as the other two.

“Well, I've already asked you guys to-” Ara lowered her voice. “-kill Zoragath.” She talked normally again. “I thought it was a bit much.”

“Not really,” Ueiko assured her. “I was having fun.”

Leigh withdrew a small ruby from somewhere on his person and tossed it toward Ara; it slid across the table and came to rest at the center. “There,” he offered and smiled warmly again.

“Cool,” Rofellos commented as he picked up the ruby and examined it.

“Not for you!” Leigh exclaimed and tried to “encourage” Rofellos to drop the gem by smacking the back of his head. At the same time, Ueiko, with his overzealous attitude toward violence, made a grab for the gem. Rofellos, trying to dodge attacks from both sides, flung himself to the side. Losing his balance, he tumbled out of his chair and lost his grip on the ruby. It bounced across the floor and came to a halt at the feet of their poor waiter.

Ueiko jumped up and retrieved the precious stone. He gently handed it to Ara and sat down, all the time glaring at Rofellos.

“What did I do? I was just looking at it!” Rofellos vehemently declared.

“Tried to take it,” Ueiko growled.