The Ballroom


Love Among Nobility

"On the first view to say, to swear, I love thee..."
Titania, A Midsummer's Night Dream

Courtly love is a complex thing, but there is a certain art to it. This is meant ot clear up some of the rather vague steps to wooing your beloved.

12 Step Program to Courting Nobility


 1. Start easy, maybe a stare or a wink. Start to talk to them at every avalible oppertunity.
2. Offer to walk them places and "happen" to meet up with them whem possible.
3. At this time, make your intent known- troubadours come in handy!
4. Now expect hesitance on their part, a preliminary rejection will probably float your way at this time.
5. Get the troubadours to sernade them at every turn
6. Start love poems, songs, flowers ect.
7. Now expect an acceptance of about every other item.
8. It's now time to show how ardent you really are: a heroic deed done in the beloved's name is a good idea.
9. Once you've proven how much you desire them, attempt to accompany them to a dance, ball, party, ect.
10. Keep in mind that you can do nothing that your beloved wouldn't approve of. They dictate your every move.
11. Declare your love to the beloved, in public if possible. At this time expect an answer.
12. Once they declare their mutual love to you, you may now swear the Oath of Truehearts.
I give a gift of myself to thee. Take it freely; freely is it offered, and forever thou hast me in thy keeping. I swear love to thee, and plodge my troth. May those who watch over love watch over this oath, and those who keep it, may we never find fault in their eyes.



On the flip side of that coin is the beloved being pursued by the ardent suitor. There is a style to accepting and rejecting their favours and gifts:

1. At first, refuse them and publicly deny your feelings.
2. Now, at the insistance of the troubadours- if you have feelings for the suitor- declare them, but cite a political difference or personal difference that wouldn't work to keep you apart, but is still an objection.
3. You may now alternately accept and reject their gifts ect. If you feel so moved, reply once in a while
4. BE FLATTERED AT ANY HEROIC DEEDS DONE IN YOUR NAME! But that doesn't always mean accept them...
5. Accept any escorts
6. When they declare their love to you in person now, reply as you will: If you love them too, reply as such, if you don't, the same.

I do hope this clears up some of the confusion when it comes to Courtly Love... but then, isn't love always confusing?

Links to other sites on the Web

A guide to Victorian Style flirting- which resembles our highly refined system.

Waltz back to The_Main_Hall Please notify me if any links don't work!

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