A Nice View From Above

a short story to provide you with some reasons

semi-autobiography, by the way

- Really gonna jump ?

I give him a grim look. I was going to have some time for thinking. Some time to think it all over. It's not that I was hesitating, I just like to think, and I like to be alone when dreaming.

- Yes.

He stands for a while in silence, observing me. Then he comes closer to the edge and looks down, thoughtfully.

- Why?
- Long story.
- Oh, you're in a hurry ?

I sigh.

- Not really.

He stares at me expectantly.

- So?
- What?
- Why are you gonna jump?

I try to sit more comfortable. It's pretty windy up here.

- Why not?
- You are quite young ...
- And you think it's an advantage - to be told what to do, to be expected to behave in certain way, to achieve some great goals ...
- So it's family problems then?
- No.
- But ...
- Just common sense. Everebody thinks that youth is fun! Seems like no-one remembers his own being teenager.

He sits beside me and looks at the horizon. I trace his look. Nothing interesting there.

- It's girls, isn't it?
- You can say so.
- She left you? Don't ...
- No. She considers me to be a good friend, that's all.
- Didn't you tell'er you lov'er ?
- No. I'm not sure I do. And besides, I'm not sure what to say.
- C'mon pal, girls are all the same, you just ...
- No. Jumping is easier.
- Are you nuts? Have you ever been with a girl?
- No, I haven't.

Police helicopter flyes over our heads with so much roaring that we have to stop talking for a while.

- Look, pal, you shouldn't do it.
- Why ?
- You don't have a single damn reason to die!
- I think I would like the feeling of freefall.
- You have all life ahead of you.
- Too hard and boring.
- What do you do?
- Study economics.
- Yeah ... But what about your parents?
- They always want something from me. Though I'm sorry for grandma.
- But I'm sure they love you!
- Me too. Guess I'm just too selfish.
- Friends?
- They'll live over it.
- All the joy and fun you could have, things you could do ?
- Name one.
- Well, discos, rock'n'roll, sport ...
- Hate them all.
- You know, church doesn't appreciate suicide ...
- I don't really care.

It seems that conversation gets hard for him. He reaches for inner pocket and takes out a flask. After a couple of gulps he offers it to me. I give it a try.
Strong stuff.

- But why here? All the guys on TV find a nice scyscraper in the city centre.
- I don't want a crowd. And I like the view, too. I used to come here rather often. I even made some paintings of this place.
- You won't be able to enjoy views or paint anything ...
- Oh, quit it.
- Ok.
- Looks like this man over there is going to call the police.
- Yeah, maybe.
- I guess I should do it now.
- Bye, then.
- Bye.

I really like the feeling.

- the end -