Dear Baby Ribbon:

I want to know why there are no horned pegasi/winged unicorns (Alicorn or Unipeg) in Ponyland. There are normal earth ponies, unicorns, pegasi, flutter ponies, seaponies, summer/windywings etc. Why no unipegs?

Baby Applejack, via email

Dear Baby Applejack,

Whoa!  Did you ever bring up a taboo topic!  My mommy saw me typing about it and made me wash my hooves off with soap!

Since we are all members of the same specie (see my Dream Beauty topic), it is genetically possible to have an alicorn, or a unipeg, or whatever, but in traditional pony culture, society is not comfortable with the mix.  "As happy and harmonious as Ponyland is, mixed ponies often confess that they do not feel truly accepted in society." states Princess Tiffany, professor of Cultural and Genetic Diversity at Dream Valley University at Ponyland (DVUP).  "For example, unipegs don't feel like unicorns because they have wings; they don't feel like pegasi because they have unicorns . . . it's difficult to fit into either, or any, category."

The age-old societal black-balling of mixed ponies goes beyond tradition.  In actuality, mixing of the kinds is technically against the fundamental rules of pony magic, rules that exist to keep us from doing mean but fun things like putting frog's legs on a sparrow. 

But hey, rules are made to be broken, right?  Ironically enough, occasionally the magic breaks the rules all by itself!  Most mixes in kind result from little "hiccups" in the fabric of pony magic in Ponyland (colloquially referred to as "black magic hiccups").  The hiccups create anomalies in the scenery, behavior, and even the inhabitants of Ponyland.  Most changes are brief; some are permanent.

With the onset of the Internet--and the resulting dramatic increase in custom ponies--times, and consequently ideas, are changing.  More and more mixed ponies are coming onto the scene, ponies who are not afraid to say, "Hey, I am who I am, and I'm beautiful!"  I guess it's kind of the My Little Pony version of the Sixties.

Up until recently, however, most of the Little Ponies were, well, of the old school.  That's why black magic hiccups are still considered to be an off-limits topic, much like politics or the infamous "roll in vs. roll out" toilet paper debate.  It isn't that the hiccups don't exist, you just aren't supposed to acknowledge them.

Through painstakingly careful control on the part of the ponies in upper echelons, hiccups are generally hidden from the public's eye. Sometimes, however, they escape and sometimes, much to the chagrin of some of the more proper Little Ponies, they are actually caught on camera.

For your enjoyme--er, enlightenment, below is my own personal compilation of "hiccup sightings;" unfortunately, most of the effects of these events were temporary.  Oh! And before we even start, I will acknowledge and discard the ludicrous, hideous idea that my hiccup collection is solely the result of bad animation!  The very idea.

"Bright Lights" (MLP 'n Friends episode) - While caught in a giant rat trap, Lofty is seen with a disappearing and reappearing third hind leg, briefly giving her five legs in all.  In the same episode, North Star has a disappearing and reappearing neck (I've had strep throat, but sheeesh!).

"Crunch the Rockdog" (MLP 'n Friends episode) - Buttons, in an effort to distract Crunch's evil rock henchmen, calls out "Over here!"  Although it was Buttons's voice,  the lip movement came from the rock henchmen.  Some literary critics cite this as foreshadowing of Crunch's future conversion to a "good guy."

"The Ice Cream War" (MLP 'n Friends episode) -  Baby Lickety-Split was talking to Baby Bouncy, when suddenly, Baby Bouncy was gone and two Baby Lickety-Splits were looking at each other.  Baby Lickety underwent months of therapy as a result of this incident.

"Through the Door" (MLP 'n Friends episode) - The male folk character Robin Hood is heard to say, in Heart Throb's voice, "Yoo-hoo! Prince Charming!"  No comment.

"Ribbons and Rainbows" 1988 MLP coloring book  - This one is my personal favorite.  Bunkie, the newborn twin pegasus is seen with a unicorn and wings.  At first, I assumed that this was another temporary anomaly, but I later discovered that the pony in the picture was NOT Bunkie.  It was her stunt double, a true, honest-to-goodness unipeg!  The grown-ups procured a stunt double for Bunkie to shoot this dangerous scene, in which she and Speckles were making a rainbow mobile and thus were working with glue.  The shot was dubbed dangerous because of the potentially brain-damaging effects of the glue fumes, compounded by the fact that brain damage runs in her family (her mother, after all, did name her "Bunkie").

Well, there you have it.  My collection.  And let me repeat, these are not, I repeat NOT the result of bad animation!  I promise!  Hope I answered your question.  I have always wanted to have wings . . .