The beauty that is mine in the toilet
Could tempt my bottom here to stay,
And I wait with anticipation
For my pee to flow away.

So here is an ode, an ode to body wastes
Because it is a magic time,
When warm poop and runny diarrhea
Are blessed with pee of mine.

I feel satisfaction peeing
On freshly fallen snow,
And I never feel like talking
When I hear my butts wind blow.

When I poop I bend and try to see it
I don't want to miss a thing,
But to those who dislike body wastes--
May a leak your willie spring.