It was a scream. An annoyingly high-pitched, never-ending shrill shriek of a scream. Who would have guessed that ever in my life I would have so badly wanted a little can of WD-40? Ugh. I think I’ve hit an all-time low. Despite this, the cart wheel continued to voice its protest.
Celica sat in the cart, comfortable as you please. Granted, her arms and legs were bound and she was gagged but if she had any skillz at all she would have been able to break free of such restraints. I felt no pity for her. Especially because she had a fluffy pillow. Alero had provided it for her. Camry and I just kinda scoffed and made fun of him for it, that’s just us, but apparently Alero is made of kinder stuff... bigger heart, all that. I’ll bet he even believes in world peace. Sheesh. Give him a shower, a chance to make himself pretty, and a new frilly outfit (which seems to be all he ever wears) and the guy’s as content as I am with a wad of cash. I’d probably have to fight Camry for that wad of cash, so perhaps I wouldn’t be completely content but that’s beside the point. The point was, Celica seemed to be warming to Alero’s good side faster than I could. He even sang those neverending sorts of children’s songs to her. He sang to her! Sometimes I even thought he might be singing in time with that annoying wheel squeak...
Camry was in a good mood too. He walked beside me with a smile on his face. When he wasn’t whistling, that is. Apparently someone as bad ass as himself wasn’t allowed to sing children’s songs, so he just whistled instead.
Miata was the only one in a not-so-happy mood. He sat on Celica’s shoulder minding his own business but it was obvious that she wanted nothing to do with him. Probably thought he was a rat or something. We’d have to look into getting her eyesight checked...
I interrupted Alero’s newest song and began skipping. “We’re off to find the city, the city of hero-boy.”
Camry took up the tune, “We hear he is a prince he is if ever a prince there was. If ever, oh ever, a prince there was the prince of-“
“He’s a prince?!”
Camry paused mid-stride and glanced at me. “Oops.”
Miata threw him an agitated look. “We’d decided not to tell her that, you dolt.”
I held up one hand. “Wait a minute, first you guys make decisions behind my back and then you withhold information?”
“Well, it would have been stupid to ask you if we should tell you.” Camry replied calmly. “Kinda defeats the purpose.”
“You want another beating, don’t you?” I muttered beneath my breath. He peered at me. “What?”
“Nothing. Nevermind.” I said. “Now tell me all about this guy. He’s a prince? That’s good. How far up in the line of succession is he? How much land has he got? What’re his enemies like? What’re his treasuries like? Has he got a girl? How close to croakin’ is his king?” I smiled charmingly as my posse suddenly stopped and just stood gaping at me.
Eh, forget it. I grabbed Camry by the arm and pulled him ahead of the group so they couldn’t hear us. “Come on, Camry, think about it. We could take an entire country by storm. Rule if we wanted to. Or we could just rob them blind, whichever works.”
“I’ve got no part to play in this.” he replied. “You’re the one who would be the bait.”
“That’s not necessarily true. He could be gay.”
Camry blanched. “G...gaaaay?”
“Yes, as in ‘he prefers the same gender’. You could be gay. You’d make a hot gay guy.”
He snorted. “Why not just ask Alero? He’d make a more convincing gay guy.”
“But Alero is gay. He’d get attached.”
“Alero’s gay?!”
I slapped him upside the head. “Keep it down, rebel boy, or he’ll hear you!”
“Are you sure?”
“Well, yeah, he’s right behind us.”
This time, Camry slapped me. I mentally added that to the list of his transgressions. “No. I mean, are you sure he’s gay?” he asked.
I shrugged. “It doesn’t really matter. He acts more like an overgrown child than anything else. The point is, I’m trying to make a deal with you. We'll split whatever we get sixty/forty and I'll promise to stop pummeling you.”
“Fifty/fifty. If this prince is gay I’ll be doing all the work.”
“Sixty/forty, my friend. Nobody ever said he was gay.”
“You did.”
“I was messin’! Would you get with the program?”
“Make if fifty/fifty and I’m in.
I shook my head. “Seventy/thirty and maybe I’ll kiss you... voluntarily.”
He grinned. “Done.”