When last we left our heroine, (moi, naturally) she was seriously contemplating the pros and cons of ending her life. Pro: No more Animeland, no more parading around in sad girly outfits, no more annoying people with strange and messed stories… Cons: The world would be short one amazingly beautiful, witty and talented woman and I'd miss the winter catalog for Modern Agent. I've heard they're doing a twenty-page spread on sezzy boots. Can you imagine?! Ohhhh, the undying bliss...

However, despite the fact that my dignity was quickly swirling down the toilet, I, my friends, am as stubborn and determined as a spoiled child in a toy store. I'll show them. They can't mock me without paying the ridiculously high price.

I pointed at Villain Girl. "You! Vile one, what's your name?" She grinned broadly and blinked. "I am Impreza, the great sorceress of Lord Mr Evil Bad Man!!"

"Imprezzive. Is it just me or is his name growing every time it's mentioned?"

She blinked again. "The Great Lord Mr Evil Bad Man wants me to get you out of the way. I will do as my master bids because-"

I held up one hand. "No, no! Wait a minute, let me guess... you're in love with him?"

"How did you know?! I would do anything for His Excellency but if he knew..."

"Look, honey, trust me, it ain't worth it. The bad guys never fall for their underlings. It's in the bad guy contract, I swear it. Mr. Bad Man and I were going over our contracts just last week and I remember. He stole my purple pen, the jerk..."

"How dare you say anything against him! I will punish you for your... your..." She stopped and tried to think of a word. I buried my head in my hands. This woman didn't even have the skills needed to deliver a decent speech. "Impudence?" I suggested. "Impertinence, insolence, disrespect... let me know if I hit on something here."

She flipped the pages of the dictionary that had suddenly appeared in her hand and held up one finger.

Meanwhile, Camry was gaping at me. "What are you, a walking thesaurus?" he asked.

"You just watch it boy or you'll be next on my hit list." I sneered. The idiot took no care in appearing intimidated. Fool.

"Hey, Impreza… you want to get on with this?"

"Just one more secon-Oof!" She looked at me in a daze. Yeah, that's right. 00Amy's a little more dangerous than she looks, huh? Quick like a fox and cunning too. I am the fox, and don't you forget it. I kicked her once more and rolled to the ground with such grace and ease even I was impressed. Aw yeah, that's style. The agency was going to have to look into increasing my salary when I got back…

It would have been wrong to rely on my mad skillz forevah though. I flicked my wrist and a girly looking wand appeared. There is something to be said about these space pockets. They're wonderful things; handy, useful, and they don't take up any room at all when traveling. Every woman should have one… it would completely eliminate any need for a purse, thereby abolishing the purse black hole crisis and really, can you argue with that? Whoever was keeping these things from the general public was committing a heinous injustice. "Pure and Wonderful Fire of Villain's Attitude Correction!!"

Villain Girl let out a little puff of smoke. She gave me one last look before her charred little self scampered off. Where she scampered to, I'm not quite sure. Villains have a way of scampering elusively.

I shook my head in disbelief. Pure and Wonderful Fire of Villain's Attitude Correction, eh? As soon as I find my writers I'm going to mangle them beyond recognition...