New State Mottos
- Alabama: At Least We're not Mississippi
- Alaska: 11,623 Eskimos Can't be Wrong!
- Arizona: But It's a Dry Heat
- Arkansas: Litterasy Ain't Everthing
- California: As Seen on TV
- Colorado: If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother
- Connecticut: Like Massachusetts, Only Dirtier and with Less Character
- Delaware: We Really Do Like the Chemicals in our Water
- Florida: Ask Us about Our Grandkids
- Georgia: We Put the "Fun" in Fundamental Extremism
- Hawaii: Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru (Death to Mainland Scum, but Leave Your Money)
- Idaho: More Than Just Potatoes ... Well Okay, We're Not, But the Potatoes Sure Are Real Good
- Illinois: Please Don't Pronounce the "S"
- Indiana: Two Billion Years Tidal Wave-Free
- Iowa: We Do Amazing Things with Corn
- Kansas: First of the Rectangle States
- Kentucky: Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names
- Louisiana: We're Not All Cajun Wackos, but that's Our Tourism Campaign
- Maine: We're Really Cold, but We Have Cheap Lobster
- Maryland: A Thinking Man's Delaware
- Massachusetts: Our Taxes Are Lower than Sweden's (for Most Tax Brackets)
- Michigan: First Line of Defense from the Canadians
- Minnesota: 10,000 Lakes and 10,000,000 Mosquitoes
- Mississippi: Come Feel Better about Your Own State
- Missouri: Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars at Work
- Montana: Land of the Big Sky, the Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies and Very Little Else
- Nebraska: Ask about Our State Motto Contest
- Nevada: Hookers and Poker!
- New Hampshire: Go Away and Leave Us Alone
- New Jersey: Ya Wanna ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here PAL!
- New Mexico: Lizards Make Excellent Pets
- New York: You Have the Right to Remain Silent, You Have the Right to an Attorney....
- North Carolina: Tobacco Is a Vegetable
- North Dakota: We Really Are One of the 50 States!
- Ohio: OhhowIhatemichiganstate
- Oklahoma: Like the Play, Only No Singing
- Oregon: Spotted Owl ... It's what's for Dinner
- Pennsylvania: Cook with Coal
- Rhode Island: We're Not REALLY An Island
- South Carolina: Remember the Civil War? We Didn't Actually Surrender
- South Dakota: Closer than North Dakota
- Tennessee: The Educashun State
- Texas: Si, Hablo Ingles (Yes, I speak English)
- Utah: Two wives are better than one
- Vermont: Yep
- Virginia: Who Says Government Stiffs and Slackjawed Yokels Don't Mix?
- Washington: Help! We're Overrun by Nerds and Slackers!
- Washington, D.C.: Wanna Be Mayor?
- West Virginia: One Big Happy Family-Really!
- Wisconsin: Eat Cheese or Die
- Wyoming: Wynot?
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