Library: Episode 10
"Pyla.. I'm bored," Reea complained. "We never have parties anymore."
Pyla's face lit up. "Reea, you're a genius! That's what's missing! We've been so busy cleaning up after all the new immigrants we forgot all about our PARTIES!"
"You mean... We could still have them?" There was a distincly hopeful look in Reea's eyes.
"Yeah... Just have to figure out who to bring. Any ideas, oh sister, mine?"
Reea whipped out a stack of books, the top one bearing the title "Interview With the Vampire." "Care to make a short run to Earth?" The grin on Pyla's face threatened to split her face at the corners of her mouth as she picked up the keys to the Mackedelic.
Louis was reading, as was his wont, in the tiny run down shack he called home. Naturally, it was night time, else he would have been sleeping, and there was no fun to be had in abducting a sleeping victim. He didn't even look up from his book at the sound of the approaching Mackedelic. Big trucks roared by on a regular basis, what was one more? Of course, casually dismissing the Mackedelic was a bad idea, especially when it pulls up to the front door of the place you happen to be residing. Louis had approximately three seconds warning before the cast iron frying pan connected with his head and the world went dark with little purple swirlies.
The next stop was New York City, specifically Lestat's penthouse apartment, where the windows were vibrating from the volume of his music. Lestat himself was sprawled on one of the sofas, snoring uproariously. Reea's newly acquired, sleek and extremely cool black motorcycle drove up to the 12th story window and knocked, hovering in mid-air. If she can drive it through space, she can drive it anywhere else she wants, too. Not getting a response to her polite knock, she drove around to the fire escape, parked and came skipping into the apartment. "Nice hair... I'll have to find out what shampoo he uses..." Careful to keep him from waking up, a conscious vampire was more likely to escape, she dragged him out to her motorcycle, neatly folding him into one of the saddlebags, and drove off again.
Armand was not pleased. He finally found a nice park bench on which to spend the evening, people watching and being watched (if you were as drop dead gorgeous as Armand, you'd be watched too), and then an offensively brightly colored Mack truck pulls up. This was not a good night by any stretch of the imagination. The motorcycle beside it seemed a bit off balance, one side at least one hundred pounds heavier than the other, but had some nice lines to it, he mused. Then the world went black and swirly, the loud *CLANG!* of cast iron meeting skull the last sound he heard.
Reea dropped off Armand in the trailer of the Mackedelic, pausing to coo over his hair for a moment, before parking her motorcycle, letting Lestat out of the saddlebag so he wouldn't get all cramped and cranky, and joined her sister in the cab of the truck.
"A successful abduction, indeed, sister dearest. We haven't lost our touch."
"Ah, but our business is not yet done. These three know each other and can get along. There's no fun to be had in that, sister mine."
"Really? Where do we go next?"
"Reea, I'm surprised at you. How quickly you forget our favorite toys."
"OOO! You mean we get to go back to Croissant for Maul and Kenobi?"
"Yes, and Qui-Gon. I promised him he could be a spectator at our next party."
"Awww...." At a sharp look from Pyla, Reea quit complaining and gestured as if to indicate that Pyla could start driving whenever she was ready.
Obi-Wan came along meekly, realizing that there was no point in resisting the insane Jedi. They'd been kind enough to give him a long break, and now he and his Master had to go. Such was the will of the Force, or at least, that's what Qui-Gon said. Of course, Qui-Gon got to ride up front in the cab, while Obi-Wan had to ride back here, in the dark, with three people with some very interesting Force signatures. Especially the black-haired one in the corner... the one with the large lump on his head. He'd have to talk to Yoda about him later. Qui-Gon was too busy teaching Anakin to be worried about this one.
Maul came along, kicking and screaming and held horizontal to the floor by three Force holds, one on his shoulders (Qui-Gon's), one on his flailing feet, (Pyla's), and one on his butt (Reea's). Dragged in this embarrassing fashion from his cozy nest of Mettallica and video games, Maul was not happy to find himself once more in the trailer of the Mackedelic, this time surrounded by extremely strange, long haired creatures, and, predictably enough, the Jedi twerp.
"Reea, how do we drug a creature that doesn't drink?" Pyla whispered conspiratorily. With the concentration of telepaths in the room, verbal communication was the safest.
"I don't know... drug someone else and let them drink their blood? It worked in one of the books."
"I thought it was the dead blood that did it in the book."
Reea swatted her sister. "Shh! We don't want the readers finding out there's a plot hole!" Pyla gave her a nasty look, as if to say "Well, aren't you the brilliant one?" Reea clapped a hand over her mouth and shot a nasty look at the authors, who grinned sheepishly and continued their handiwork.
A few hours later, a wildly protesting and entirely random person had been dragged to the main lobby.
"Now Mir, drink this up. It'll be good for you!" Pyla held the glass to the girl's lips, the smell of SlimFast and charcoal assaulting Mir's nostrils. With a sigh of aggravation, Reea Forced the girl's mouth open and dumped the liquid in, holding her nose until she swallowed. "There's a good Mir. Mr. Lestat, wait for her to fall asleep and you may drink." Lestat didn't look like this was an entirely optional situation, and disapproval was marked plainly on his extremely handsome features. "Armand, you will go next." The beautiful vampire looked at least as disgusted with the situation as Lestat did. "Louis... You won't be drinking." Reea shot a strange look at her sister.
"What do you mean, "he won't be drinking?" He has to drink!"
"No, Reea, he doesn't. I'm the one administering the potions today, and he doesn't have to drink. Now go forcefeed Maul and Obi-Wan, they look thirsty." Reea skulked over to the two, handed them undiluted glasses of the mixture, and glared at them until they upended the glasses and drained them of their contents.
"Go to sleep so you can entertain me." The two obligingly followed orders a few moments later. The vampires weren't far behind.
Qui-Gon, having conveniently snagged a camera from somewhere, clicked away merrily. The sight of his apprentice practicing an aerial routine with Lestat and Armand was simply too priceless to miss. Pyla and Reea were watching as Louis and Maul introduced themselves. They really weren't paying attention to Maul's demonstration of unusual loquacity, Pyla was too busy drooling. Yes indeed, Pyla had finally found her equivalent to Reea's Maul. Louis was in trouble now. Reea, having with long experience finally curbed her drool reflex upon seeing Maul, was putting cherries on the points of Maul's horns in preparation for tracing the tattoos on his head with whipped cream.
Pyla and Reea whirled around suddenly as they heard the door slam back against the wall, Reea "ulp"ing reflexively and hiding her tools of fun behind her back, expecting the Librarian. She was relieved (momentarily) to note that it was not the Librarian, it was Yoda.
"Strange flow in the Force I have felt. Centered around this place, it is. Reveal itself to me, it will." The green skinned Jedi Master's voice carried through Obi-Wan's mental haze, causing him to falter in mid-flip and fall flat on his butt. Yoda waddled over to Louis immediately. "Very Force strong, you are, yes... Become my Padawan, you should." Yoda produced a razor from somewhere deep in his robes and made threatening moves towards the vampire's hair, apparently with the intent of reducing the beautiful mane to a standard Padawan hair cut. Pyla and Louis's faces held the same expressions of abject horror. Pyla's lightsaber flew to her hand, ignited, and promptly reduced the razor to a puddle of slag on the floor.
"You will NOT take him as your Padawan! He's mine!" Louis looked at her in abject shock.
"Yours? I'm yours?"
"Yes, mine, now be quiet, I'm trying to save your hair." The door crashed open again and the Librarian stood sillouhetted in the doorway, to Reea's never ending horror.
"The only saving that will be taking place in this Library is me saving these men from you two horrible girls. Pyla, put the 'saber away, and Reea, I do hope you intend to replace my ice cream sundae supplies." She waved an imperious hand and all present snapped out of their drugged haze. "You're all going home." With another wave, this one punctuated by a brilliant white light, they were all gone and she turned a stony glare on the twins.
"You two.. are in deep trouble."