Battle Hymn of the Empire -A personal fave
(As sung by master Yoda, on meeting Luke Skywalker).
(To the tune of YMCA, sung by the Village People)
YOUNG MAN, I saw your ship come down. I said
YOUNG MAN, now it's muddy and brown. I said
YOUNG MAN, put your weapon away, 'cause I
*MEAN* *YOU* *NO* *HARM* *I* *SAY*
YOUNG MAN, There's no need to feel fear. I am
WONDERIN', tell me why are you here? How you
GROWIN', from this food on the plate, I say
*WARS* *DO* *NOT* *MAKE* *ONE* *GREAT*
You must be here to see Y.O.D.A
You must be here to see Y.O.D.A.
He's 900 years old!
He's so strong in the Force!
Do your Jedi Diploma course!
You must be here to see Y.O.D.A
You must be here to see Y.O.D.A
Come and get yourself clean!
Come and have a good meal!
Pretty soon now, the Force you'll feel!
YOUNG MAN, you fell out of the sky, into
SOMETHIN' brown that smells like a sty, and this
TIN CAN started swimming and then, he got
*SPAT* *OUT* *LIKE* *SOME* *THROAT* *PHLEGM*
YOUNG MAN, Welcome to Dagobah. He is
COMIN', master Yoda not far. I'll be
HAVIN' this bright thing that ain't hot. It is
*MINE* *OR* *I'LL* *HELP* *YOU* *NOT*
You must be here to see Y.O.D.A
You must be here to see Y.O.D.A.
He's 900 years old!
He's so strong in the Force!
Do your Jedi Diploma course!
You must be here to see Y.O.D.A
You must be here to see Y.O.D.A
Don't just stand in the rain!
You're all covered with mud!
come and sample my homemade crud!
OLD BEN, Are you listenin' to me? I can't
TRAIN HIM, he's so reckless you see! Like his
OLD MAN, he's so angry but brave! Betcha
*HE* *SCREWS* *UP* *AT* *THE* *CAVE*
YOUNG MAN, If you start will you end, or be
GOING, off to save all your friends? To be
TRAINING, needs commitment and work, if you
*WIMP* *OUT* *THEN* *YOU'RE* *A* *JERK*
You gotta stay here with Y.O.D.A
You gotta stay here with Y.O.D.A
You should stay here and train!
You don't have to save Han!
If you do so, you'll lose your hand!
You gotta stay here with Y.O.D.A.
(repeat and fade).
THE BATTLE HYMN OF THE EMPIRE To "The Battle Hymn of the Republic"
By Steven Cavanagh (scavanag@sydney.dialix.oz.au)
Oh put your hands together for the ruler of the stars
he's the boss, from Coruscant out to the home of Owen Lars
Once he wiped out all the Jedi Knights, and then passed out
cigars and he keeps marching on!
CHORUS:
Glory, glory to the Emp'ror
Glory, glory to the Emp'ror
Glory, glory to the Emp'ror
He just keeps marching on!
And now we bow in reverence to his own evil Lord
Vader dresses all in ebony, and loves to be abhorred
and he has a shiny helmet and a groovy laser sword,
and he keeps marching on!
CHORUS
(stormtroopers)
We're the legions of his troopers, and we always dress in white
and we're taught to fire randomly in every firefight
Now we know to tilt our heads to keep the tops of doors in sight,
and we keep marching on!
CHORUS
(scout troopers)
Well we also dress in white, but we're the Endor bunker scouts
not those little boys that dib and dob, those wimpy layabouts.
We can fly at high-speed, scream and have spectacular wipeouts,
but we keep marching on!
CHORUS
(tie pilots)
We're the pilots of the Empire, and we fly the fearsome TIEs
and we somehow always get our butts kicked clear across the skies
If we blow up for no reason, we don't think it's a surprise
we just keep marching on!
CHORUS
(death star gunners)
We're the gunners of the Death Star, and we wear a funny hat
and we fiddle with the switches that blow planets into scrap
and the rumour that we're extras is complete and utter crap,
we'll just keep marching on!
CHORUS
(snowtroopers)
We're the snowy region troopers, and we storm the worlds of ice
and we almost got the Falcon with that tripod-gun device
If you meet us on the weekend, then you'll find we're rather nice
and we keep marching on!
CHORUS
(walker pilots)
We're the pilots of the walkers that are fearsome, great and tall
we can fight in rock and snow and jungle- AT-ATs do it all
but we haven't figured out that if you trip them, then they fall
So we keep marching on!
CHORUS
(royal guard)
We're the royal guard all dressed in red, the stormtrooper elite
we can shoot a mynock's eye out from about six hundred feet
but we can't be all that smart, because we haven't learned to
speak,
we just keep marching on!
CHORUS
(officers)
We're the British-sounding officers, we fly a giant ship,
and we look down at the pit crew and we drive them with a whip
For we know that if we screw up, Vader makes us get a grip,
So we keep marching on!
CHORUS
THE STAR WARS ANTHEM To "The Star Spangled Banner"
By Steven Cavanagh (scavanag@sydney.dialix.oz.au)
Far above Tatooine
under bright twin suns' light
'cross the heavens it sailed
turbolasers a-beaming
Flying through the bright stars
in a perilous fight
came Lord Vader's great ship
that the princess was fleeing
At the title's fanfare, 'twas a movie so rare
that we saw long ago, and today we're still there!
Oh say we love Star Wars, its virtues we'll rave
We were born Star Wars freaks, and we'll be to the grave!
(to the tune of "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" by the Beatles)
GREEDO: Picture yourself in a bar at Mos Eisley,
With the Cantina Band and odd-looking thugs,
Somebody shoots you right there at the table,
The man with the seven-foot rug.
STORMTROOPERS: Millennium Falcon of tan and green,
Flying up over your head,
Shoot at the man with the droids in his ship and he's gone,
CHORUS: Solo in the Sky with Chewie (3x)
BEN: Follow him down to the Death Star Space Station,
But Alderaan is there no more,
LUKE: Gee, those lightsabers have cool animation,
Ben's coat empty there on the floor.
HAN: Leia's obnoxious, insulted my ship,
Why didn't we just leave her there?
Climb in the Falcon with droids still in tow and we're gone,
CHORUS (Repeat until you die!)
LET ME BE To the Beatles' "Let it be"
By Steven Cavanagh (scavanag@sydney.dialix.oz.au)
(As sung by Luke, on a bad day)
When I find the plot's in times of trouble
Ben Kenobi comes to me
Speaking endless prattle
Let me be!
He suddenly appears before me,
through his body I can see.
Always uninvited,
Let me be!
Let me be, let me be,
Let me be, oh let me be.
Obi-Wan Kenobi
Let me be!
Each time I see the guy, there's someone
brand new in my family.
Who comes next? Chewbacca?
Let me be!
Although the guy has parted, still he
shows up unexpectedly
Here's a simple answer:
Let me be!
Let me be, let me be,
Let me be, oh let me be.
Obi-Wan Kenobi
Let me be!
Although I travel 'round, I cannot
seem to get my privacy.
Ben just seems to follow,
Let me be!
And know you know just why I always
roam throughout the galaxy
I'll move on tomorrow,
Let me be!
Let me be, let me be,
Let me be, oh let me be.
Obi-Wan Kenobi
Let me be!
HELP To the Beatles' "Help"
By Steven Cavanagh (scavanag@sydney.dialix.oz.au)
(As sung by Luke, from Bespin weather vane).
When I was younger, so much younger than today
I hadn't travelled all around this place far, far away.
But now those days are gone, I'm not so self-assured
I've been had, and Darth's my Dad,
and now I've lost my sword.
Help me Obi-Wan, I've fallen down
And it's such a bloody long way to the ground
I think my hand is at the lost and found
Won't you please, please help me!
Oh boy, how things have changed in oh so many ways
Looking down, I think my hand just vanished in the haze.
This weather vane I'm on, it doesn't feel secure
I know that I just need you like I've never done before
Help me Obi-Wan, I've fallen down
And it's such a bloody long way to the ground
I think my hand is at the lost and found
Won't you please, please help me!
When I was younger, so much younger than today
I hadn't travelled all around this place far, far away.
But now those days are gone, I'm not so self-assured
I've been had, and Darth's my Dad,
and now I've lost my sword.
Help me Obi-Wan, I've fallen down
And it's such a bloody long way to the ground
I think my hand is at the lost and found
Won't you please, please help me!
I'll Be There For YouFrom Intrepid84@aol.com
(To the tune of the Rembrandts' "I'll be There for You")
So no one told you life was gonna be this way
Just blastin' starships into shreds all night and day...
Still the Falcon's stuck in second gear
While the Empire hunts us down all week and month and standard year, but
I'll be there for you...
When the laser blasts pour.
I'll be there for you...
When you're stokhlied to the floor.
I'll be there for you...
'Cause you're there for me too...
They'll never find us in this God-forsaken place.
Might want to think again, ol' Han, you flyin' ace -
We got a probe droid sayin' "I found'em here!"
And 'bout a dozen AT-AT's comin' in, but have no fear, 'cause
I'll be there for you...
When they blast out the door.
I'll be there for you...
With a ship that can soar.
I'll be there for you...
'Cause you're there for me too...
It seems I'm hangin' upside-down in open space
Right over Bespin, with 5 G's right in my face
The Falcon's upside-down but comin' here
And I know the way Han pilots, so the end is surely near, still
I'll be there for you...
When you can't fight the war.
I'll be there for you...
When your hand's on the floor.
I'll be there for you...
'Cause you're there for me too...
No one could ever know me,
No one could ever see me,
Since you're the only one who knows what it's like to be me...
Someone to face the truth with,
Make it through all the tests with,
Someone to help me take it, somebody to fight the rest with, you.... yeah!
I'll be there for you...
When the laser blasts pour.
I'll be there for you...
When you're stokhlied to the floor.
I'll be there for you...
'Cause you're there for me too.
(Sung to, of course, "Do-Re-Mi" from the Sound of Music)
BIGGS:
Doh! We're late! Too freaking late! The
Ray! Of heat turned on has been! Dear
Me! I think it is the end
For! The fourth moon of Yavin!
WEDGE:
So? We'll fight'em anyway!
La! -ck your lasers and attack!
Te! -ams, in formation please stay!
I will say it once more. Doh! Doh! Doh! Doh!
LUKE:
Doh! I've got one on my tail! It's
Ra! -ining laserbolts out here! Dead
Me! -at I'll be if you don't work
Fa! -ster at getting my butt clear! It looks like
So! -ber's one thing that he's not!
La! -lly-gagging will not help!
Ti! -me is one thing I've not got!
So I'll have to lose him by-my-self-oh-
WEDGE:
Doh! The Y-wings were destroyed! While
Ra! -cing towards the exhaust port!
Me! -thinks that we'll have to go
Fi! -nish this or else abort!
BIGGS:
So! -mething's on my radar screen! It's
La! -dging right behind my ship! Oh,
TIE! fighters are what I've seen!
But I don't have time to - ZH-ZH-ZH-blip!
REBEL LEADER ON YAVIN 4:
Doh! That's one more that we've lost
Ra! -ging battle up in space!
Me! -ek I feel at admitting that
Farm! boy is now being chased! Wait--
So! -lo's on my radar screen!
La! -cking and blasting that TIE! LUKE:
Ti! -me to kill these Impish fiends!
HAN:
Shoot the pro - ton - and - pull - upp...
DEATH STAR INTERCOM:
The Death Star is in range OH CRAP -
BOOM!
(Sung to "Seize the Day" from Disney's Newsies)
Open the wings and seize the day!
Don't be afraid and don't delay.
No ship can take us!
No blast can bake us!
We will make them pay -
Lift off and seize the day!
Cover a pal and seize the day!
(Cover a pal and seize the day!)
Charge up your cannons and clear the way!
(Charge up your cannons and clear the way!)
Wrongs will be righted
If we're united
Let us seize the day!
Down with the Death Star!
Down with Black Sun!
One for all and all for one!
(Sung to "I'm the King of New York" from Disney's Newsies)
Double laser turrets with access hatches...
A low'ring ramp with power latches...
A gaming table in the quarters...
A smuggling hold under the floorboards!
Look at me! I'm the king of skies!
Suddenly, I'm a smuggler, like no one other, ain't got no 'druther.
Maybe she looks like cruddy old junk
But, hell, for a freighter, she's got some spunk!
Don't ask me how this baby found me
Gamblin' just crowned me
I'm the king of the skies!
A radar screen with resolution...
A nuclear engine; no pollution...
Steadfast shields, and did I mention
A hyperdrive that gets attention!
Tip your hat! I'm the king of the skies!
I'm nothin' flat! I'll be smugglin' spice 'n' tibana, I'm your man-a!
Jabba through Zorba, I'll make the trip
'Cause nothin's too far or tough for this ship!
I'm number one! Fast is nothin', I ain't bluffin', I'm the king of the -
Kessel Run! Easy demo, no problemo, I'm the king of the -
Life's redone! Once a struggler, now a smuggler, I'm the king of the skies!
(To the tune of Disney's "Under the Sea")
The moisture is always wetter
On somebody else's farm.
You think about running off now
To someplace not quite as warm.
You think about priorities!
You think about ice and snow!
Well, kid, let me tell you somethin'!
It's better here than you know!
On Tatooine!
On Tatooine!
I say, it's no better
Off where it's wetter
Than right where you've been!
Water may be a lux'ry here,
But water can be one's utmost fear.
It ain't so neat
When fifty feet deep
For year after year!
'Round here most of us are happy
To spread out and get a tan.
You say that you're sick of sunlight.
Well, cold's got a price, young man!
You wanna get really chilly?
You think frostbite is a hoax?
You wanna be found unfrozen,
You better get fond of coats!
On Tatooine,
On Tatooine,
We don't have to worry
'Bout "hypothermi".
That can be seen!
With double the suns to keep us hot,
Frozen is one thing this planet's not!
The place with the heat
Is our easy street
And that's Tatooine!
We farm and we eat
In monst-e-rous heat;
We work up a sweat
By walking the pet;
True, people have died
By stepping outside,
But our fam'ly line survived!
We rake in the dough
From mined H2O.
'Round here, that's a trade
That makes you well-paid.
'Cause water's like wine
Where double suns shine,
And life needs to be revived!
Oh, On Tatooine!
On Tatooine!
You may be the king
In a T-16,
But what does that mean?
Ya bet the Alliance wants an ace!
But teamin' with rebels ain't your place!
Don't be a flyer, stay where it's dryer, on Tatooine!
Alliance is falling, this is your calling, on Tatooine!
You're truly elite, but not for that fleet;
Stay here where it's hotter, forget about water;
Yah, this is heaven, at 107°, on Tatooine!
From Andrew Sneddon
The Solo's (To the tune of The Flintstones)
Solo's meet the Solo's
They're a smuggler Jedi family
The Falcon can do the Kessel Run
In parsec's less than 12.3
Someday, maybe the Imps will win the fight
And Leia will become a Jedi Knight
When you're with the Solo's
You'll have a wookiee is annoyed time
A pull apart the droid time
You'll have a grand old time!!!
From Temp
I'M NOT THERE FOR YOU
Vader: so no one told you that I'm you're dad
I killed your mentor and your family's been had
not everbody has days like these
you find your father and he brings you down to your knees
I'm not there for you:have I been there before?
I'm not there for you:when your hand began to soar
I'm not there for you:so turn to R2
To the tune of "Home, home on the range"
Oh, give me a home where the Sandpeople roam
where the Jawas and Banthas play
Where water is heard as a forbiden word
And the sun shines down brighty all bay
Home, home on Tatooine
Where the Jawas and Banthas play
Where water is heard as a forbidden word
And the sun shines down brightly all day
by Kyra Saltamn
To the tune of oh, suzanna
Well, I come from old Corellia
with my Wookiee next to me
and I'm going to pay off Jabba
Cause I own him a big fee
Oh, Darth Vader, oh don' you cry for me
cause I come from old Corellia
with my Wookiee next to me
well, I slept all night the day I left
in the mornin I was tired
When I went to see the slimy Hutt
he told me I was fired
oh, Darth Vader, oh don't you cry for me
cause I come from old Corellia with my Wookiee next to me
From Jonathan Murphy
(to "Bingo")Shadows of the Empire by: Jonathan Murphy, Nick Pittman, and Kevin McRillis
there was a prince of the black sun and xizor was his name-o
chorus: X-I-Z-O-R , X-I-Z-O-R , X-I-Z-O-R , and xizor was his name-o
there was a no good gambler and lando was his name-o
L-A-N-D-O , L-A-N-D-O , L-A-N-D-O and lando was his name-o
there was a there was a slimy criminal hutt and jabba was his name-o
J-A-B-B-A , J-A-B-B-A , J-A-B-B-A and jabba was his name-o
there was a dark lord of the sith and vader was his name-o
V-A-D-E-R , V-A-D-E-R , V-A-D-E-R and vader was his name-o
"It Was He" to the tune of "Let it Be" by the Beatles.
Luke is reminiscing about the aid Ben has given him in his past. By Emily Gaudier
When I found myself in times of trouble
Ben Kenobi came to me
A blue spirit or a light voice
It was he
When I was freezing in the darkness
He appeared right in front of me
A blue spirit in a light haze
It was he
It was he
It was he-e
Kenobi-e-e
It was he
He was just like a Holo
It was he
I saw my Father strike him down
"Run Luke" he said to me
The Galaxy still spun
It was he
As I travelled to destroy the Death Star
I felt he was right there with me
I was very young
Kenobi
It was he
It was he-e
Kenobi-e-e
It was he
I was very young
It was he
On Dagobah he came and told me
"With you no longer can I be"
I was there with Yoda
It was he.
But I know that he would be there
If there was a Death Star III
Iąd blow it clear to Bespin
Just you see
It was he
It was he-e
Kenobi-e-e
Just you see
It was Ben Kenobi
It was he.
SYMPATHY FOR THE REBELS
-------------------------------------------
(sung to 'Sympathy for the Devil' by the Rolling Stones (version used is the one by Guns N' Roses on the 'Interview with a Vampire' soundtrack album).
Please allow us, to introduce ourselves:
we are heroes of space and sky
We fight the Empire in StarWars,
And please, don't ask us why!
We were around when Bothan Spies
gave us an Imperial code,
Made damn sure that Palpatine,
was on board the Death Star, so he would explode
Please, why don't you? ..celebrate, we're done!
But what's, puzzling you, is_simply how the heck we won?!
We were around on Alderaan,
when it was simply blown away
We survived, though, because we are,
the good guys so we're here to stay!
We were on Hoth when AT-AT's drew near,
Fighting Captain Veers,
with that guy from "Cheers"!
Please, why don't you? ..celebrate, we're done!
But what's, puzzling you, is_simply how the heck we won?!
Some were around when those Jedi guys
fought for long decades
with the clones they made,
I shouted out who killed Luke's Aunt Beru,
When afterall, it was me and you!
So let us please introduce ourselves:
We are heroes of space and sky,
They built two Death Stars to stop us, though,
So you can't say they didn't try!
Please, why don't you? ..celebrate, we're done!
But what's, puzzling you, is_simply how the heck we won?!
Sometimes even the power of the Force can't help,
and no Jedi can save your soul
So please have just enough sympathy,
To allow us one plot-hole..
Though we're the Heroes of Yavin, man
Heroes of Endor, man
Heroes of Hoth,
We really needed them cute teddybears,
yes, without them would just have lost!
Please, why don't you? ..celebrate, we're done!
But what's, puzzling you, is_simply how the heck we won?!
Please, why don't you? ..celebrate, we're done!
But what's, puzzling you, is_simply how the heck we won?!
Please, why don't you? ..celebrate, we're done!
But what's, puzzling you, is_simply how the heck we won?!
(repeat until dead)
---------------------
From Deborah Edlund
Let's Blow the Whole thing up
by KC Gleason and Jon Levitt
to the tune of "Let's call the whole thing off"
by Harry Connick, Jr.
You say "Jabba," I say "JObba"
You say "Buba," I say "BOba"
Jabba, JObba, Buba, BOba
Let's blow the whole thing up
You say "X-wing," I say "B-wing"
You say "A-wing," I say "That thing"
Oh, let's blow the whole thing up
Oh, if we blow the whole thing up, we must part
and oh, if we ever part that would puncture my heart
I say "Star Wars," You say "Str Wrs"
I'm not gonna stop watching Star Wars just 'cause you say "Str Wrs"
Let's blow the whole thing up
** INSTRUMENTAL **
Oh, if blow the whole thing up, we must part
and if we ever part that would break my heart
So, I say "LUcas," you say "Luckas"
Pepper, what's the problem?
For we know we need each other
So, we'd better call the blowing up off
Oh, let's
(blow it up!)
Let's
(blow it up!)
I'm talkin' baby why
(blow it up!)
*A Darthin' dotin' day
(blow it up!)
dubbie Falcon yea
(blow it up!)
Boba Fettn' dooo
(blow it up!)
Oh, let's blow the whole thing up!
*scat: Slang n. A type of Jazz singing in which meaningless syllables are improvised on the melody.
From Chris "Snyper" Lorentzen
Sung to the tune of "Winter Wonderland" :
Lasers scream.. are ya listenin'
Check your screens..red dots glistenin'
A beautiful sight....we're happy to fight
Flying in the Star Wars universe....
Check CMD's..A TIE fighter!
As we aim..lock and fire
A beautiful sight....we're happy to fight
Flying in the Star Wars universe....
Alliance squadrons take on the Empire
So many battles have we quickly won
We can't believe how easily they tire
'Cause they claim that we're out-numbered three to one
Later on...in the hanger
We'll recount...all the danger
We'll sleep well tonight...we fought the good fight
Flying in the Star Wars universe
Flying in the Star Wars universe
Flying....in the Star Wars....universe
STAR WARS LAND
(sung to the theme of Gilligan's Island)
By: Daniel Brock
-
Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale
A tale of a blonde-haired boy
That started on an old sand planet
And ended with a joy
-
The hero, son of the enemy
His friends were dangerous
They set across the galaxy
To fight for the Rebel Alliance
-