Becoming
by Pandora

~*~ Buffy ~*~

My first thought when I came to was, "Why am I in a hospital?" My second was that I was really, really hungry. But not hungry in a good kind of way, because I wasn't craving Lucky Charms or Frosted Flakes. I wanted blood. Apparently, everyone else had seen this coming, because Angel handed me a packet of blood. I looked at him like he was crazy.

"What's going on?" I asked.

Giles, Spike and Angel exchanged looks before Angel asked me, "Buffy, what's the last thing you remember?"

"We were in the library...cursing Faith...then the bookshelf fell over on you, Spike and Willow--" I panicked. "Willow? Is she okay? Is she hurt?"

"I'm fine, Buffy." Willow said from over in the hospital bed. I relaxed, since she looked okay. I noticed that she was leaning on Spike, who had his arms around her waist and smiled. Looks like Xander owes me money, I thought.

"Buffy, there's no easy way to tell you this..." Giles said.

"Tell me what?" I asked, alarms going off in the back of my head.

Angel, Spike and Giles all exchanged looks again. None of them said anything for a few minutes.

"Where's Xander?" I asked, realizing he wasn't there. "Is Xander--"

"Xander's fine." Angel said softly.

I saw the looks on everyone's faces. They were keeping something from me. Something big.

"Angel, if you have something to tell me, just tell me. Drop the cryptic you're scaring me." I said, looking him dead in the face.

Angel looked at me sorrowfully. "Buffy...you..."

"What?" I asked, panic setting in.

"Oh, bloody hell." Spike said, whipping a mirror out of Willow's night table drawer and handing it to me.

I looked in it. And saw...nothing. Not nothing, as in nothing wrong, but absolutely nothing. I didn't show up. I had no reflection.

But that's impossible, I thought. Only vamps have no...

And then I remembered.

It all came back to me in a horrible rush. Faith breaking Giles' fingers...telling us her plan to destroy the world at noon...stabbing me...so much blood...all of it mine...Giles saying, "God forgive us"...Angel biting me....

"I'm a vampire." I whispered.

Angel looked at me, his pain and guilt written all over his face. "Buffy...you were dying...bleeding to death. You had about five minutes left to live. There was nothing else I could do. I tried, Buffy. God, I didn't want to do this to you. If there'd been any other way, I would never have--"

I pressed a finger to his lips, stopping him. "Shhhh."

Tears were in his eyes. My heart ached. My Angel.

"This is NOT your fault, do you understand me?" I asked, cradling his face in my hands. "Do you?"

"Buffy--" He started to say.

"Do you?" I asked again, cutting him off.

Angel searched my face, and for a moment seemed lost in his own thoughts. But then, finally he moved my palms to his lips, kissing each one before he said, "I do."

I smiled at him. He smiled back at me.

"You're still the same, Buff," Willow added. "You even have the same title. Buffy the Vampire Slayer, only a little more emphasis on 'vampire' now."

I laughed. "Right, Will." Then I saw the clock. "Oh God, it's eight-thirty! Faith's going to pull a Marvin the Martian in three and a half hours! We got to find her. Now."

"It's okay, Buffy Cordelia's looking for her, and Xander's getting the materials to curse her right now." Angel said.

I relaxed a little, until I remembered. "But the bookstore's closed today. Where's he getting materials?"

Angel, Spike and Giles exchanged glances before Angel said, "He has to go out of town to get them."

My eyes widened. "He'll never get back here and curse her on time! No way. We have to get her."

"Buffy, Cordy's going to have to handle this one." Willow told me sadly.

"You're just going to let Cordy go out there, on her own, to fight Faith?" I emphasized each word so harshly that they all winced at how stupid I made the idea seem. "No way. Cordy's been through enough she shouldn't have to do this, too. I'm going." I started for the door. Spike grabbed me by the shirt and shoved me into a chair.

"Bloody Hell, Slayer, you're a vamp now! You can't just go barging out there in the middle of the day unless you want to be brought home in a dust buster!" He cried angrily.

I gaped at him. I knew it was true, but I didn't want to believe it. Cordy would probably get killed trying to stop Faith. Or worse, she'd end up having to kill Faith herself. I looked over at Angel. If it came to it, and I had to do it to save the world, could I kill him? I felt my heart break for Cordy.

"No one should have to send the person they love to Hell." I said softly to Spike.

Nobody responded to that.

~*~ Cordelia ~*~

It had been half an hour since I'd gotten the sword at Angel's when Xander dropped me off in front of Acathla's tomb.

It was twenty minutes of searching the tomb before I realized that Faith had had the damn thing moved.

It was an hour of hitch hiking back to the heart of Sunnydale and ten minutes of thinking, and another hour of walking, before I finally found where Faith was actually performing the ritual.

One hour left. I did not have very much time.

Faith smiled when she saw me. "I thought they might send you."

"Nobody sent me. They all said it was a bad idea." I replied. It was true.

"Oh, really?" Faith said. "Nice to know my girlfriend wants to see me for once without having to be told to." She noticed the sword I was toting. "What are you going to do with that, Cor baby?"

"Kill you." I said softly, staring at a face that once held love for me. But there was no love in those eyes now. I could do this. I was ready.

"Well, I can't just let you kill me, Cor. You want me dead, you're going to have to fight me first." Faith said, smirking at me.

I nodded, choking back tears. "I know."

"Well, then, by all means, let's battle." Faith said, vamping.

I held up the sword and prepared for an attack.

~*~ Xander ~*~

I ran out of the car and into the hospital, disregarding nurses, doctors and other patients. I had something important to do, dammit, couldn't they see that?

I tripped over my shoelaces and fell flat on my face. I groaned and tried to pick up everything as fast as I could. There was only half an hour to go now. Half an hour to prevent the end of the world.

~*~ Cordelia ~*~

I was losing. It was pretty obvious. Faith was a vampire, and a former Slayer besides. She was much, much stronger.

It was hardly a fair fight, but that wasn't what mattered. What mattered was that she was too busy fighting with me to awaken Acathla. And hopefully soon, they'd have her cursed. Then it would all be over and I'd have my Faith back.

Faith kicked me in the stomach. "You're pathetic!" she yelled at me. "Not even worth the effort!"

"Then why are you still trying?" I sneered up at her. She backhanded me across the face with her fist.

"Don't talk to me like that, bitch!"

I kicked her feet out from under her, then crawled across the room for the sword.

Faith grabbed my ankle. "I'm not finished with you!" She gripped my foot and gave it a painful twist. I screamed in agony. She had broken my ankle.

She climbed to her feet. "Guess what, bitch? I'm going to destroy the world, and you're going to fucking watch!"

She walked over to Acathla and started the opening chants to the ritual.

I struggled to gain my footing, trying not to yelp over my broken ankle. I picked up a rock and flung it at her. It struck her between the shoulder blades.

Faith whirled around to face me, her face twisted up in its demon visage.

Hurry, guys, I thought.

~*~ Willow ~*~

I wrung my hands nervously, looking at the clock. Fifteen minutes to go. I felt tears in my eyes. I might only have fifteen minutes to live, I thought.

Apparently, the others are thinking the same thing, since Giles is pacing, Buffy's whittling a stake in the corner and both Angel and Spike have their heads bowed, trying not to look at anything.

We all jumped, startled, as the door to my room was flung open. Xander stood there, panting.

"I got it." He said, holding up a brown paper bag.

~*~ Cordelia ~*~

I yanked Faith's hair, eliciting a scream from her. She brought her knee up into my gut. I groaned in pain.

"What's the matter, Cor baby?" Faith taunted me. "Don't you like it rough?"

I punched her in response. She flipped me onto my back, pinning me. "Oh, that's right. You liked it all slow. God, you were so weak! So pathetic. I can't believe that you're the one I fell in love with. If it had been Willow or B, at least I'd have had a girl with spirit! You're just a prissy teenybopper valley girl who's scared to have real sex because she might break a nail!"

I shoved her off me, took off one of my shoes and threw it at her.

Faith burst up laughing. "You're going to have to do better than that, lover."

She turned away and resumed where she left off with the ritual. I collapsed on my back, exhausted. I knew I couldn't take much more. But I had to. If I wanted to save the world, if I wanted my Faith back, I had to take all she could dish out and more.

"Yeah, well, at least I had sex! You couldn't handle it with a man if you tried! Xander was a better lover than you!" I shouted at her, hoping to draw her into another fight.

It worked.

~*~ Buffy ~*~

I sprinkled salt around Willow's bed while Giles and Angel set up the materials on the lap desk she was holding. I circled the bed three times with the salt.

I gave Willow a trembling smile. "Cast the circle thrice about to keep the evil spirits out, right?"

Willow smiled back. "Right."

Xander and Spike lit the candles around the room. I'd already locked the door. Hopefully, no nurses or doctors would try to come in while we were doing this.

I passed Willow the spell's text. I looked over the bed at Angel.

"Here's to hoping it works this time." I said.

"Here's hoping." He said softly.

~*~ Cordelia ~*~

I wrestled on the floor of the cavern with Faith. Every time I did, it took a little more of her time. But already, the ritual was half-finished, and if they didn't curse her soon, I'd have to kill her to save us all.

Could I do it? I was so sure until I came in here and started beating the hell out of her. Now, I didn't know.

Faith slammed her fist into my gut. It took every ounce of my physical strength not to throw up.

"We're going to Hell, lover." She told me, smiling crazily. "No, you're going to Hell. I'm going to kill you." I snapped at her.

"You're too pathetic, Cor baby. Face it I'm going to win. Eventually, you're going to get tired. But me? I don't get tired. I can wail on you for as long as I want, and I won't even break a sweat."

"Put your fist where your mouth is, Faith." I spat on her face.

~*~ Angel ~*~

For the second time, I watched Willow chant in Rumani. Thankfully, without my brethren's intervention this time.

I looked at Buffy. She'd been an exquisitely beautiful human, but as a vampire, she was unbelievable. The pale complexion complimented her blue-green eyes, and her blond hair made a perfect frameset for all of it. Now she was going to live forever...be with me forever.

She gripped my hand tightly as Willow's chanting became louder, more frenzied. The curse would be done soon. Then we would have nothing to do but wait.

I hope to God we finish on time.

~*~ Cordelia ~*~

I failed. Faith gashed open her palm, slapped it to the statue, and Acathla was awake. I have to kill her now. There's no other way. I couldn't keep her busy long enough to prevent the ritual while they cursed her. And now, I have to kill her.

It's not her punishment. At least, I don't think so. It's mine. I'll have to go through the rest of my life, knowing I killed her. Her blood will be on my hands.

Better hers than the rest of the world.

I reached over and grasped the sword. I started to climb to my feet.

Do it quickly, I repeated to myself. Do it fast and you won't even have to open your eyes.

Faith turned around, eyes wild and saw me.

"We're going to Hell, Cor baby!" She yelled at me. She laughed and drew her hunting knife, which was still wet with her blood.

She put her foot on my chest and pinned me to the ground.

"And now, I'm going to take care of you, Cor." She told me. "Just like I always do." She held up the knife and I waited for it to plunge into my chest, ending my life.

It never came.

For, all of a sudden, there was a flash of light in Faith's eyes and the knife was laying beside me.

And Faith looked as confused as a five-year-old studying trig.

~*~ Faith ~*~

"Cor?" I asked in a whisper. "What happened? What are we doing here? Where is 'here'?"

Cordelia looked up at me strangely. She looked shocked. I didn't care. Seeing her at all seemed like some kind of miracle. Like I hadn't seen her months. Years, maybe.

"Baby, what's going on? Where are we? I don't understand."

She reached up tentatively and touched my face. "F-Faith?" She asked me in a quivering voice, almost like she was afraid to believe.

Believe what? I thought.

"What are we doing here, Cor?" I asked softly. "The last thing I remember, we were fighting vamps in an alley. What happened? Did they knock us out? I don't remember. Everything's all messed up. It's like I can't think clearly."

Cor didn't answer my questions. Instead, she covered my mouth in what was probably the most intense kiss of my life.

She broke off and wrapped her arms around me so tight, I nearly winced. "Faith, baby." She kissed me again. "I love you. I love you so much." She was crying. Why was she crying? I don't understand. She kissed me again, only softer, sweeter, like she wanted to take her time.

"I love you, too." I whispered into her hair. She kissed me again, both our mouths opening to gently touch our tongues together. "Cor, what's wrong?"

"Shhh. It doesn't matter. Nothing matters. Except you. You matter." She hugged me close again, her tears felt warm on my neck. "I love you, Faith."

"I love you, too, baby." I whispered, drinking in the sight of her. God, but she's beautiful. I heard some strange whooshing sounds behind me, but when I started to look, Cor grabbed me and kissed me again. I ran my hands up and down her back.

She broke off and sobbed, "Oh God, it's too late. There's no time. I can't..." She started sobbing softly, and buried her face in my neck. I kneaded her shoulders. "Hey, Cor. What's wrong, babe?"

But then she was kissing me again. "I love you. Always. Never forget that, no matter what happens. I love you. I love you with all my heart. God, I love you." She whispered to me between kisses.

"I love you, too, Cor baby." I whispered to her, pulling her close.

She sniffed a little, then pressed her forehead to mine. "I love you, Faith."

"I love you, too, Cor."

She lifted my face up to hers, and kissed me again. It was so warm and soft, and so passionate. I could feel everything she felt for me, everything she would ever feel for me in that one kiss. And although, it was probably the best kiss Cor and I had ever shared, it sent a chill through me. She was kissing me as though it were the last time.

I heard the whooshing sounds again, and looked to her in fear. "What's happening?" I whispered.

"Shhhh. Don't worry about it." Cordelia whispered, combing her fingers through my hair. "I love you, Faith. Never forget?"

"Never, baby." I promised.

She pulled me close, and covered my mouth with hers.

~*~ Cordelia ~*~

I kissed her as I did it. I needed to. Each kiss was so precious, and this was the last time I would ever kiss her. And she was so afraid. She needed to be kissed and held, even if it was only as she died.

Died in my arms.

I was still kissing her as I pulled back the sword. Still kissing her as I ran the sword through her chest. Still kissing her as she cried out in agony against my lips.

Finally, I pulled away from her. And saw the hurt in her eyes. Not the physical pain. The betrayal. I had killed her.

"I love you, Faith." I sobbed.

"I love you..." She whispered, starting to float away from me into the mouth of Acathla, the sword still protruding from her chest.

"No!" I cried, grabbing her, pulling her close. I felt her blood staining my clothes and the sword hilt jabbing my ribs, but it didn't matter. Faith mattered.

"No!" I cried again, clinging to her like there was no tomorrow. Because there was no tomorrow. The world was saved, but the only person in it that I really need would be dead.

"Just hold onto me, Faith," I whispered fiercely. "Don't let go, whatever you do." Maybe if we clung hard enough, she wouldn't have to go. Maybe Hell would just close itself up and leave me my lover.

Faith clung to me. She didn't understand what was going on, but she knew she was scared and she knew that I wouldn't let go of her, no matter what.

She and I sat on the floor, clinging to each other, fingers tangled in one another's hair, tongues tangled in one another's mouths. I wasn't letting her go. Hell could take it at its leisure it wasn't getting Faith.

I felt the energies swirling around us. It made me so sick, but I could also feel the energies flowing away. Maybe it was actually going to leave Faith. Maybe I got to keep her.

But then, suddenly, strange purple mists were swirling around both of us in a perfect spiral, enveloping us, sealing us in. And that's when I knew.

It wasn't leaving Faith.

It was taking us both.

And I didn't care. I didn't care! Where we were didn't matter Faith mattered. Us being together mattered. I had just gotten her back. Nothing was separating us again.

"Cor..." Faith sobbed, clinging to me in fear.

"Shhhh." I whispered, burying my face in her hair. "It'll all be over soon. It'll all be over soon."

I felt the floor fall away as Faith and I were lifted up and carried into the mouth of Acathla. Into Hell.

"Cor!" Faith cried, outright weeping.

"I love you." I whispered.

Faith sobbed and held me tighter in response.

I felt the magick started to close. We were in Acathla’s mouth now. Soon, the magick would seal the gateway. The world would be saved, but Faith and I would be lost forever. I inhaled the scent of Faith's hair, and knew immediately that it was worth it.

I wasn't sure how I knew, but I knew, if I let go of Faith at any point before the magick was permanently sealed, it would let me go and carry her the rest of the way to Hell. I held her tighter. I had put her here, I wasn't going to leave her there by herself.

I could hear the inhuman howls and screams of pain coming from the inhabitants of the place we were going. Poor souls being tortured forever. Forever lost in darkness and pain, with no one to care.

At least Faith and I had each other, whatever it was worth.

I closed my eyes and let the darkness consume me.

~*~THE END~*~

::hands reader either a tissue to dry their eyes or a flame-thrower with which to destroyer me:: Feedback, please?

Go here for more of Pandora's stories.

This page hosted by Get your own Free Home Page