, a small division of TMDOTPBM Enterprises International, Inc. ©2003 Founded by The Mighty Druids®, ©1994. All rights reserved.Just because your coat is shiny doesn't mean you have to lick it too.
I had a dream a few days ago. It started out that I was in Iraq, in a prone fighting position (lying down aiming a weapon) next to a Marine doing the same thing. We were "sniping" enemy soldiers and doing a damned good job of it ("One shot, one kill!"). Every once in a while a few Iraqi soldiers would sneak up on us, but we had no problem taking care of them. This went on for a while.
Eventually that part of the dream faded and I was entering a house and there were a bunch of porn stars fucking each other. I got paired up with some hot girl, and eventually we started having sex. After a while, she stopped and insinuated that my penis wasn't large enough to satisfy her (in as nice of a way as possible). I've never considered myself that small member-wise, but I guess in the land of porn flicks I'd be hurting. That's about it for the dream. I found it funny, but sometimes I worry.
A couple of postings ago I expressed my displeasure with friends who have had an openly negative attitude towards my new friendship with Jeni. I had intended on writing about the friends who have supported me the next day, but plans changed. So now I'd like to thank everybody who has been supportive of an otherwise touchy situation. First of all, even though I listed Christy in the pessimistic entry, she really has been wonderful. She wants me to be happy and wishes me the best of luck (maybe in not so many words, though).
Of course Jay and Sara have given me the most encouragement out of everybody. They've even commented on how well I've opened up and expressed how I feel, especially to Jeni. I love the phone calls at work, curious as to what had happened recently concerning Jeni. They've been the cheerleaders that make me feel I'm not just a retarded guy who can't control a crush he has on a girl and that, even with the looming possibility of being emotionally destroyed, the risk is well worth it. I can even use them as a convenient scapegoat for inadvertently pressuring me if I end up hating my life :0).
Paul has also expressed interest in my postings. He hasn't exactly encouraged me to continue my current course of action (whatever that might be), but the fact that he says he reads what I write encourages me to write more. I wouldn't want to disappoint with a "...haven't seen or heard from Jeni in weeks and I just don't care..." so I try not to do that. Gotta please my fan(s), right?
...
So I've found myself more comfortable around Jeni, and I attribute that to familiarity and to our phone conversations. I love it when she calls, even if it is usually between sleep sessions. We've talked very little about important things (with a couple exceptions), but it's all part of becoming better friends. I say that those conversations are the highlights of my days, and I'm only half-joking. I admit that if my days included more exciting things like winning the lottery or going to Notre Dame football games then the conversations might slip down the rankings a bit, but I still look forward to talking with her.
Yeah, I'm easily amused. "Yeah but last year I didn't get any cake and they said this year I could have a peice of cake so I'm gonna have a peice of cake..."
, a small division of TMDOTPBM Enterprises International, Inc. ©2003 Founded by The Mighty Druids®, ©1994. All rights reserved.