You People Are Priceless (Soth vs. TheOsprey)
Here's more beefy material form our dear friend TheOsprey. Msted, naturally:
you people are priceless
(Tom):The story of a poster who couldn't reach the the Shift of Caps Lock keys.
I simply have to laugh with gusto.
(Mike):Yes, Gusto, my gay Italian friend!
You people are turning into a real self fulfilling prophecy.
(Crow):Don't you always self-fulfill your prophecies?
(Mike):Well, I THINK so.
In just a matter of a few days things are falling apart so well I almost can't take credit for it.
(Tom):In fact, I CAN'T take credit for it! I'm just a brainless commentator!
What do I mean?
(Mike):The only post where the explanation is bound to be more confusing than what's being explained.
First we have of all people a newbie who has to tell it like it is.
(Crow):First we have of all people...should there be any commas, like, anywhere?
(Mike):Well, I THINK so.
Some body named SuperFly basically said the show is a dead goner.
(Tom):And with a single misplaced tap of the Spacebar, TheOsprey implies that corpses are now posting on the Internet!
I couldn't agree more!
(Mike):What am I agreeing to again? I always get good and drunk before I write these things.
And the fact that a new person was able to see this should tell all you vets something.
(Crow):It should tell you that vets get a special discount in some stores!
You all cling to a show that is finished and this guy comes right in lays the truth on you.
(Tom):Unlike TheOprey, who attempts to splatter pieces of truth across the BBoard, but fails every time.
Now I won't get into why you didn't attack him like you did me.
(Mike):Because he wasn't tacky abou it, which insults TheOsprey, which is why he won't get into it.
I'm just glad somebody hammered the truth home
(Crow):Period? Punctuation? Anything?
2nd, there was the priceless post in which Tom, Henry and cavewoman moaned and groaned with each other about who was wasting more post between them,
(Tom):Turns out TheOsprey was voted the most wasteful!
with the always present pokejedservo yapping between it all hoping to be heard like a lapdog.
(Mike):This guy is more like a lapweasel.
If you want a good laugh read #9208 and all the bickering replys.
(Crow):I'm making notes of all the errors in this post so far.
(Mike):How many have you got?
(Crow):I can't count that high.
third we have my buddy puckshark,
(Crow):And capitalize sentences....
weeping that he couldn't infect us with his dreary movie reviews as long as a telephone book.
(Tom):Meanwhile, TheOsprey drones on LONGER than a telephone book, and with less entertainment value.
Poor thing couldn't watch his movie, and we don't have to suffer through his highbrow crap.
(Mike):Highbrow crap vs. TheOsprey lowbrow crap. You decide!
This is a good week!
(Tom):My mother finally spoke to me!
Amazingly though he still managed to have a longwinded post that said zip.
(Tom):Well, she said, "Lick me!" but still....
Or how did he put it ? "Plenty to write but nothing to say" I couldn't have said it better.
(Mike):In fact, you're not stating it ANY better at all. Actually, this is a pretty good example.
I think he's stealing my material.
(Crow):Trust us, NO ONE would steal your material unless they wanted new birdcage paper.
And as for all you wits who cleverly pointed out that I had typos in my posts
(Tom):Hey, I think he means us, too!
it goes like this. I sit , write, post, done.
(Mike): Yunno, someone else said something about thinking not being on that list. I think they were right.
I'm not going to sit and reread, proofread, correct, erase, and whatever you waste your time with.
(Crow):That's why I'm burger-flipping at Hardee's!
It aint worth it and you still managed to get my point, right?
(Tom):Ok...um...it's an elephant! Is that your point? No? These guessing games are hard...
Keep it up everybody, your making me proud!
(Mike):Proud to be an English flunkie!
Host segment:
(Crow is on deck, reading the latest TheOsprey post. Mike and Tom enter.)
Crow: Six hundred and eighty-two.
Mike: Hey, Crow, what are you doing?
Crow: Counting the number of errors in TheOspery's last post! He got really mad about it, so I just wanted to point them out to him.
Tom: Huh, well, how many do you have so far?
Crow: Uhh...six hundred and eighty-two....no, wait! Six hundred and eighty-three!
Mike: Oh, come on, he couldn't have made that many!
Crow: You'd be surprised, Mike! Look, some of them are double errors. See, he used the word "aint." Everyone knows that's improper English, but he also didn't put an apostrophe!
Tom: Wow! And I thought it was just his spelling!
Crow: Nope. I'd say our friend TheOsprey must have slept through every English course he ever took. In fact, I think his name was a mistake. I think he's a country buff and wanted TheOprey, but he misspelled it.
Mike: Well, that's food for thought! Be back next time!
Tom: Maybe he should post on the Sesame Street BBoard and learn his English. (Crow and Mike mutter "Maybe...." Fade out.)
Until his next post, see you all, and take care!
Soth
I've had a bad week. Take me back to your uplifting MSTings!
This is sad. Take me Home!