Title: I Don't Know You Anymore Author: Kathya Email: Drus1lla@cs.com Rating: PG (i think) Disclaimer: I do not own the characters Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Angel. I am merely borrowing them, they will be returned to Joss Whedon when I'm through. I also do not own the lyrics to the song, they belong to the wonderfully talented writers in the group Savage Garden. Author's Note: I was listening to this song, trying to get inspiration for another fanfic I'm writing, but it ended up inspiring me to write something else completely. Feedback would be appreciated. Summary: Angel returns to Sunnydale after years away. I would like to visit you for a while Get away and out of this city Maybe I shouldn't have called but someone had to be the first to break We can go sit on your back porch Relax Talk about anything It don't matter I'll be courageous if you can pretend that you've forgiven me Angel waited with the phone to his ear, waiting for her familiar voice to come across the other end. The phone continued to ring, and suddenly she answered out of breath. "Hello?" Buffy called into the phone. He stayed silent for a moment, wondering why he was intruding into her life when he had stayed away for so long. He had seen her a year ago, he and Cordelia had gone back to Sunnydale for Giles' funeral. He had stayed away from her then, even though he knew she needed him. It had been six years since he had last held her, since he had asked the Oracles to turn back time. Cordelia would fill him in occasionally, only letting him know that she was still alive. At first it had seemed like there was something more she wanted to say, she would get a look on her face like she was under a terrible burden, but she never said anything. "Buffy?" he whispered. "Angel?" There was disbelief in her voice, and pain. He couldn't ignore the pain that he heard there. He knew she hadn't moved on like he had hoped for her, that she had stayed alone in Sunnydale. "Are you there?" He knew she was going through a difficult time again, according to Cordelia she had just lost her mother as well. He knew he had to go to her, to be a shoulder for her to cry on. "I'm coming to Sunnydale, can I see you?" "Of course," she answered immediately. "I'll be there after dark." "I'll be at my mother's, well my house." "I'll see you tonight." Because I don't know you anymore I don't recognize this place The picture frames have changed and so has your name We don't talk much anymore We keep running from the pain But what I wouldn't give to see your face again She was older now, he could see. Not so much in her features, but in her eyes, she was no longer the vibrant young girl he had known. Everything was different in the house. New photos graced the walls, and the mantle above the fireplace, but he didn't really notice them. She was the only thing he could focus on. She seemed to be distracted, glancing towards the stairs, as if she were waiting for someone. "Why are you here?" she finally asked. They had sat in silence for so long, afraid of what they might say to one another. "I thought you needed me," he answered. "I've needed you before," she said, her throat constricting with the emotions coursing through her body. Suddenly she was on her feet, moving about the room, breathing deeply. Angel turned when he heard the small voice call out to her. "Mommy?" He saw Buffy turn as well, going over to the little boy who had just come down the stairs. She knelt in front of him, kissing his forehead before lifting him into her arms. Buffy had a son. Something he hadn't known. He watched her with her child, he was right, she was a wonderful mother. "What's wrong sweetheart?" "I couldn't sleep. Grandma didn't read me my story." He heard Buffy draw in a shaky breath, fighting back the tears. "I told you Grandma went to heaven. It's just us now." Her hands were caressing the back of his small head, trying to soothe his pain. "To take care of Grandpa Giles?" "Right," she answered. "Would you like to meet Mommy's friend Angel?" Angel saw him nod, then almost gasped aloud when Buffy turned towards him with her son. He had short dark brown hair, Buffy's smile, but he saw his own eyes staring back at him. Springtime in the city Always such relief from the winter freeze The snow was more lonely than cold if you know what I mean Everyone's got an agenda Don't stop keep that chin up you'll be alright Can you believe what a year it's been Are you still the same? Has your opinion changed? "Angel," Buffy began, "this is Iain. Iain, this is..." "My daddy," the little boy finished. "Buffy?" Angel looked from her to the little boy in her arms. He couldn't believe what he was seeing, he had a son. He heard footsteps on the stairs, and saw Cordelia come down. "Why don't you let Auntie Cordy get you ready for bed. I'll be up to tuck you in, okay?" Iain looked from his mother to Angel. "Will Daddy come too?" Buffy glanced at Angel as she handed her son to Cordelia. "We'll both come," she answered. Angel watched Cordelia as she carried his son up the stairs, he hadn't missed the look of guilt in her eyes. He couldn't seem to find his voice as he followed Buffy into the living room. "I don't understand," he finally managed to get out. "I should've told you. I tried to call you so many times. I just couldn't." "How, I mean, I." "That's the first time I've seen you speechless," Buffy tried to lighten the tension between them. "He's five, I named him Iain because it means 'God's gracious gift.' I figured when I saw you in him, that's what he was." Because I don't know you anymore I don't recognize this place The picture frames have changed and so has your name We don't talk much anymore We keep running from these sentences But what I wouldn't give to see your face again "How could you keep this from me?" Angel couldn't help the anger that was beginning to grow inside him. Buffy brushed at the tears that were starting to slip down her cheeks. Angel was looking at the pictures on the mantle more closely now. Buffy and Iain smiled out at him from a photograph that had obviously been taken at Halloween. His son was dressed as a pumpkin, proudly showing his mother a bucket filled with candy. There were more photos of his son and Buffy with all her old friends, even a couple with Spike. He stopped at a photograph of Giles, Buffy and a newborn baby Iain outside the hospital. He ran a finger over the glass before turning back towards her. "It wasn't right, I know that. But I was so angry, and so scared. I was pregnant, nineteen, and I couldn't even remember the day that I was with you. I kept having these dreams, they were so real, and a part of me knew it had happened." "That Thanksgiving you came to LA to see me?" Buffy nodded her head. "It came to me slowly, I know about everything that happened that day. I know it was real, and I wasn't just driving myself crazy wishing for something I couldn't have." "I had to keep you safe, I couldn't protect you that way." "I know." They moved towards each other, the tears streaming down both their cheeks. "I figured that you didn't want to be with me. I was really hurt, and I guess I didn't tell you because of that. There's no way for us to be together, we both know that. I'm sorry. There's nothing else I can say to you now." I know I let you down Again and again I know I never really treated you right I've paid the price I'm still paying for it everyday So maybe I shouldn't have called Was it too soon to tell? Oh what the hell It doesn't really matter How do you redefine something that never really had a name? Has your opinion changed? "Buffy, I want to be here for you, both of you." Angel watched as she played with her hands, she did that when she was anxious. He noticed something on her hand he hadn't seen before, a silver claddagh ring. He took her hands in his, causing her to look up at him. "How can you ever forgive me for not telling you?" "You've forgiven me much worse." He held her as she cried against his chest, their tears mixing together. Their lips met timidly, afraid of what time might have done to them. Their passion for each other was still as strong as it had been from their first kiss until their last day together. Angel knew she still loved him as much as he loved her, that love had created the little boy upstairs. Everything he had ever done wrong was made right in his son, and in that moment when Angel forgave himself his past, both he and Buffy felt his heart begin to beat. "He's waiting for you," Cordelia interrupted. Buffy smiled at her friend, then at Angel as she led him upstairs to where their son waited. Iain was sitting up in his bed, waiting for his parents. He giggled as his mother kissed his face all over, like she did every night. Angel sat beside Buffy on their son's bed, watching as they went through their nighttime routine. "The gold people told me Daddy would come," he told them. "What gold people?" Buffy asked. "The gold people," her son replied. "They said Daddy would come home to us. You are home? You won't go?" "I won't go," Angel answered. "Goodnight my son." "Goodnight Mommy, goodnight Daddy." Iain raised his face for kisses from both his parents, then hugged them as they tucked the covers around him. Buffy rested her head over Angel's heart, listening to the steady beat below her ear. He tightened his arms around her as they watched their son sleep. They were a family now, the three of them. Because I don't know you anymore I don't recognize this place The picture frames have changed and so has your name We don't talk much anymore We keep running from the pain But what I wouldn't give to see your face again I see your face I see your face