On Sears hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping."

On a bag of Fritos: "You could be winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside."

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of box): "Do not turn upside down."

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."

On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."

On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."

On a child's Superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."