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Southern Martian cooking has never been better with Kil behind the stove.
(This recipe has been altered from its original form for humans. It is suggested that this concoction not be taken in by humans either)
2 Kilograms of Rocks
1 Big mallet
3 Grams of sugar
4 Liters of Coca-Cola
1 Big fireplace
Take the mallet and smash the coke bottles in the open fireplace.
Then, take the sugar and sprinkle it on the rocks.
Eat the rocks and enjoy cleaning up the mess in the fireplace.
1 pound of Assorted Tribbles
2 Giant sticks
1 Face Hugger
400 Bowls
20 Rags
4 Gallons of water
Wet the rags and place them inside the bowls. Dump the water inside the bowls and place the face-hugger CAREFULLY inside one bowl. Take the sticks and beat the face-hugger off of your face to avoid breeding tiny chest-bursters. Take the Wet Rags out of the bowls, and cover the Tribbles with them. Uncover the tribbles, and let the Rags sit out for an hour. When the rags are hard, eat the rags and pet the Tribbles and clean up the Face-hugger off the ground.
We would like to inform you that Kil has been sent to a local mental institution on your planet.
Instead, we introduce Dobe,
the intergalactic tap dancer.
Unfortunately, Dobe has suffered a sprained ankle from an accident
involving a marble and a creature equivalent to the Elephant.
The event itself is to horrifying to describe.
